Yo-Yo Mama! After a special school assembly, Bart gets into yo-yos and is really good at performing all the tricks until one day he nearly kills the Simpson's pet fish when he accidentally smashes their tank!
Everyone in school is called to a special assembly. Bart thinks it's going to be boring and sighs.
However the assembly has some special guests, professional yo-yo players! They perform special stunts with yo-yos.
“Kids, this is a yo yo. Pretty mundane and boring isn’t it?” said a guest speaker playing with a yo yo. “Or is it?”
There are professional yo yo artists with special high tech yo yos.
“Sparkle!” A female yo yo artist.
“She’s beautiful...” the boys sigh.
“Zero gravity!” An artist is upside down.
“The cobra!” An artist in a snake basket has a yo yo on his tongue and launches it before swallowing it.
“Aaaaaaaagh! Cobra!” Homer screamed being in the assembly for some reason.
"Cooooool! I want a yo-yo!" said Bart.
“Those guys must be billionaires!” said Milhouse.
“I bet they get all the girls!” said Nelson.
“I question the value of this assembly...” said Lisa.
“Shaddup!” Bart yells at her.
“Children please. Let’s not get over excited by yo yos...” said Skinner.
“Kids, how about we get your principal up here!” said the stunts men and er woman.
Everyone cheers as Skinner is dragged on stage.
They launch their yo yo yos dangerously at him.
“Oh! That nearly grazed my ear!” Skinner chuckled.
“Keep still Principled Skinner. These yo yos are extremely dangerous!” said Mr Amazing.
“They’re not kidding...” said Yugi Moro from season zero in Japanese.
Bart frowned at Oscar.
“What? They did a chapter on deadly yo-yos...” said Oscar.
“Mwuhahahaha!” Diesel Kane, yes that’s Hirutana’s English name laughed evilly while misusing deadly yo yos.
Yugi sighed and held up a sign with Japanese writing. Underneath in Roman letters was the word Baka.
At lunch Bart kept going on about what yo-yo he was getting.
“Something basic, nothing to fancy like those newfangled ones with flashing lights or sounds...” said Bart to his friends as he ate lunch.
"How much do those cost?" Milhouse asked.
"I don't care." said Bart. "I just want a yo-yo."
"That's pretty mundane. Everyone has yo-yos. I have no idea why our creator wrote an episode about yo-yos..." said Richard.
Lewis was playing with a yo-yo.
Oscar brought Teddy, his living teddy bear in. He had chosen corned beef hash for lunch from the cafeteria but didn’t want it. So he gave it to Teddy to eat by feeding him it.
"Ay Caramba, this smells awful!" Bart gagged at the stench of his corned beef. He winced. "Oz don't bring your teddy bear to school..."
“This corned beef hash taste just like dog food.” said Teddy.
Kids who had also chosen the corned beef hash suddenly spat out their food in disgust and caused and angry and loud commotion.
"Oy gevalt!" Jurkle could be heard yelling.
“Children. Children! Children calm down!” Skinner got everyone to shut up. “I can reassure you that Lunch Lady Doris would never, ever serve dog food for lunch.”
“Um... sure...” said Lunch Lady Doris looking shifty.
“Now who is the student responsible for this slanderous rumour?” said Skinner.
“My pet living teddy bear Teddy.” said Oscar.
Everyone laughed at him for bringing his living teddy bear.
“Oscar report to my office immediately!” Skinner said angrily.
Everyone went Oooooooooh! Or made handbag noises.
Oscar left the scene carrying Teddy.
"I want a yo-yo." said Bart.
"Boy... it's "May I have a yo-yo?"} Homer explained.
Bart groaned. "May I have a Yo-yo..."
"Just a minute sweetie." said Marge she was cross with Oscar. "Now Bumpkin why have you got yourself detention?"
"I fed some of my corn beef hash lunch to Teddy and he said it tasted exactly like dog food. Then everyone rioted and Skinner got mad at me for something Teddy said..." said Oscar.
"Look just take me to the toy store and get me a yo-yo!" Bart groaned.
Bart’s family go to the toy store during Grampa's visit to buy a yo-yo and other toys.
“Bah! In my day we didn’t have fancy toy stores and whatchacallits! We used to...” Gramps ranted.
“Dad clam it! We don’t want to hear any more of your stupid In my day... stories!” Homer yelled at his dad.
“I just wanted to make conversation...” Grampa whined.
However Homer sees a giant floor keyboard.
"Hang on, I have something I need to do." Homer explains. He runs onto the giant keyboard and slides down it to make a chord. Then he starts singing "Rock around the clock tonight!" really badly and off key. The other customers. Get annoyed and yell for him to shut up. Homer in midsong then starts swimming across the keyboard.
Oscar starts laughing at Homer's antics.
"Oscar don't encourage him..." Bart sighed.
At the end of his song Homer slides across the keyboard breaking it with a loud feedback squeal as the keys shatter exposing the circuits and wires underneath.
Everyone yells and walks off.
"Sir, you'll have to pay for breaking that. It costed 300 dollars." a store clerk explained.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
Marge hrrrrrrmed in disappointment.
Lisa tried the Malibu Stacy dolls however something was wrong with one of them.
"My spider sense is tingling!" said the doll in a male voice.
"That's not right..." Lisa comments as she puts the doll back.
Next it was Grampa's turn to misbehave and break things.
"Toys! Pa! In my day toys were made to last! Look how fragile this thing is!" Grampa with some difficulty snaps a toy rocket in half. "And these toy soldiers, which I may rant, we did not paint ourselves green during the war! Except for camouflage, but not our entire bodies... Look I can step on them!" Grampa stamps on the plastic soldiers.
"Ok, Gramps... Time to wait outside please..." A store clerk escorting him outside the store.
"Oh! I have a soldier in my slipper!" Grampa moaned as one of the toy soldiers got in his slipper.
Bart was admiring a large and probably expensive James Bont volcano lair play set.
"Cooooool!" Bart cooed. “The Dr Never volcano play set! With death bringer missiles!”
He placed it on a table where Maggie was playing with the toy you put the shapes in the correct holes.
"Hrrrm! Bart, you wanted a yo-yo... Besides that's way too expensive, even for a birthday present...." Marge sighed.
Homer was observing the play set. "I bet it falls apart the moment we take it home too! And-Aghhhh!" Homer jabs himself on a sharp part of it and his finger bleeds. "Why you!" He sets off the toy's real firing death bringer missiles and one goes in his mouth and explodes.
"Hrrrrrmm... Let's just get to the yo-yo section...." Marge sighs.
Elsewhere despite that he's supposed to be with the Simpsons on their day out to the toy store. Oscar went on an adventure. Apparently he thought he was a robot so a bureaucratic organisation made him sign forms in triplicate to state he wasn't a robot.
Oscar was doing the robot. "I am robot. Bart your actions are illogical."
Bureaucrats kidnapped Oscar.
"Please confirm to your knowledge that you are not a fully robotic being, were born an organic creature, and do in fact possess what many cultures would call a soul." said the bureaucrats. They gave him forms to sign.
"What? “To my knowledge”? Do a lot of people not know if they’re robots?" Oscar winced and reluctantly signed the forms."
"Thank you for confirming. Move through." said the bureaucrats letting him go.
"What if I was a robot and I didn’t know it?" Oscar asked.
"The machine would melt you from the inside out. Please move along, sir." The bureaucrats sighed.
"Okay, I’m not a robot, so I’ll be fine." Oscar sighed. "Killjoys..."
At the yo-yo section Bart was doing tricks with a yo-yo.
"Remember Boy, don't aim that at your sisters! Don't play with it indoors... and well that's it." said Homer.
"Fine..." Bart sighed.
"I might as well use this time to write up my letter of complaint." said Abe.
He was dictating what he wrote.
THERE ARE TOO MANY STATES NOWADAYS.
PLEASE ELIMINATE THREE.
I AM NOT A CRACKPOT.
Yeah sure Abe... eliminate three states...
Bart shows off his new yo-yo to all his friends. He quickly learns all the tricks.
Bart's friends gasp in awe as they watch Bart perform yo-yo tricks.
However Oscar can't yo-yo properly and is pulling his yo-yo about, string fully unwound, in frustration as it won't come back up again.
Nelson laughs at him. "Haw! Haw!"
Oscar goes off frustrated.
In an office.
"I'm sorry, young man. You're just not ready. Pick up your check at the front office, and for god's sake, put some clothes on!" said a boss as we see is talking to Oscar who is naked for some reason. Uh....
Back at school.
"Oz? Are you okay?" Milhouse asked. Oscar looked over at him Quizzically. "You've been um weird all week."
Oscar frowned. "I am not weird! I am eccentric!"
"Mil don't talk to him... he'll start going on about clowns again or something..." said Bart calling Milhouse over.
"I better go." said Milhouse.
Oscar sighed and went off to do random and increasingly stupid things.
Bart suddenly noticed it was raining large wheels of cheese.
"Oz..." he sighed.
Ralph was performing a trick with his yo-yo when he was squashed by a large wheel of cheese.
"Haw Haw!" Nelson laughed.
However one day Bart is playing with it indoors despite being warned not to. Not being careful his yo-yo flies at the fish tank and shatters it! Water floods everywhere and the pet fish flop about everywhere in desperation to breath.
"Oops!" Bart gulps.
Everyone runs in to see the mess. They gasp in horror.
"Bart! what did you do now?!" Homer yells.
"It was an accident!" Bart whines.
"Bart! What did we say about playing with your yo-yo indoors?!" Marge scolded him.
"We'll kill the boy later Marge! Right now everyone grab a fish and take them to the kitchen sink!" Homer said as Bubbles and his wife were jumping about on the carpet. And Snowball II was watching them hungrily while flicking her tail ready to pounce. "No fish for you kitty! Shoo!" Homer shooed the cat. She hissed at him.
The fish were saved in time and in a temporary home until a new tank could be bought.
"Okay now we kill the boy." said Homer.
"Dad, I agree that Bart should be punished but-" said Lisa.
"I completely disagree! I think you should leave poor Bart alone! So what if he nearly killed two dumb fish..." said Oscar.
Bart smiled and tousled Oscar's hair. Lisa glared at Oscar.
"Well it's a good thing you're not his father!" Homer said snarking.
"Bart, I'm confiscating this until you learn your lesson!" Marge took his yo-yo!
"No fair!" Bart groaned.
"Yes fair!" Marge scolded him.
"No fair!" Bart whined.
"Norfair?" Oscar asked summoning Ridley.
However Oscar was willing to help.
"It doesn't involve killing Mom and Dad does it?" Bart interrogated Oscar.
"No! Of course not!" Oscar replied in an offended tone.
Once everyone was out Oscar went through everything in the house.
"Ugh! Not their underwear drawer..." Bart told Oscar in disgust.
"Bart, I know how to find confiscated items. I've had experience when my folks were still alive..." Oscar explained. "I know every hiding place."
"I wonder what happened to them..." Bart asked himself.
Oscar eventually found his yo-yo and gave it back.
However Marge found him playing with it and was cross.
"Mom, if I were you, would I give you something back I confiscated..." Bart asked.
Marge imagined a tiny version of herself being teased by a giant Bart.
"Here you go, just kidding! Here you go, just kidding!" said the giant Bart in her imagination as he was sat at the dining room table teasing her with his yo-yo.
"Well... No..." Marge sighed.
Homer was mad at Bart for being smart alecky. "That's it, go to your room!"
But they were in Bart's room. "But I'm in my room!" Bart explained.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
Bart laughed and muttered a smart remark about Homer under his breath.
"That's it! Go downstairs!" Homer yelled. However they were all of a sudden downstairs.
"But I am downstairs!" Bart explained.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
Once again Bart laughed and made a smart remark.
"That's it! Go to your room!" Homer yelled. This process repeated itself over and over...
"Enough! Bart, you can keep your stupid yo-yo! But you're grounded and your allowance will pay towards the new fish tank!" Marge yelled.
"Awww gee..." Bart sighed.
The Simpsons are having breakfast in the kitchen one day after enough money is accumulated to pay for the new fish tank. The pet fish are swimming in the kitchen sink.
"Well, this gave us an excuse to use the dishwasher...." Marge remarked as she put the dishes in the dishwasher. The fish were watching her.
"Look you'll get your new home today!" Marge told the fish.
"Mom the fish don't understand you..." Lisa sighed.
later in the lounge.
"Nothing is on!" Homer wailed as he flipped through the T.V. channels, one right after another.
"How about you mow the lawn?" Marge asked.
"You could do some work around the house. I'd really like that hole in the kitchen wall fixed. I keep shooing snakes out of the house." said Marge.
In the kitchen snakes hissed and slithered out of the wall.
"See this is why we do not let Lisa do animal rights stunts. They're annoying and I get bitten by something! When was the last time something Bart did that was annoying?!" Oscar ranted.
"Oz for your information-" Lisa berated him but Bart carelessly broke a vase doing a yo-yo trick.
"Bart!" Marge yelled.
"Oops!" Bart gulped.
Oscar was engrossed by the TV.
"Uh, Oz, if you look at the screen any longer, you might have vision problems." said Lisa
Oscar laughed. "Aren't you being a little dramatic, talking basketball?"
Lisa winced exasperated.
Eventually the new tank was set up and the fish were soon swimming about in it.
"Let this be a lesson. Bart..." Marge explained.
"Okay, I won't play with my yo-yo indoors..." Bart sighed.
"I sure hope this whole incident didn't stress out the poor fish!" Lisa ranted.
"Lisa the fish probably don't remember, they only have three second memories!" Homer explained.
"No they don't! That's just an urban legend! And-" Lisa explained but Homer started snoring. "Forget it..."
A cool and quiet November night passes through the city of Springfield, especially in a house on Evergreen Terrace, in this house there is a 10-year-old boy, with yellow skin and spiky hair, wearing green pajamas.
The boy, Bart who you've read about a zillion times in my series by nowM was under the covers of his bed, with a flashlight in one hand, and the latest Radioactive Man comic in the other; the young man was very fixed on the comic pages and the little giggles of emotion that he saw page after page, to the point of rolling slightly in his position on the bed; movement that stops momentarily when the youngster hears a raspy voice:
"Do you mind, Bart? I am trying to sleep." Hugo groaned.
Bart gave a small sigh of frustration, closed his comic and resurfaced from the sheets of the bed, pointing his flashlight to another boy very similar to him although with messier hair, and missing teeth, wearing a big black shirt; he was sleeping on the right side of the bed.
"You're not supposed to be out out of the attic!" Bart hissed pointing his torch at Hugo.
Hugo squinted. "And do you mind not waving that thing in my face! I am still getting used to outside light!"
Bart sighed and switched off his torch and set aside his comic.
"Why don't you sleep in the attic?" said Bart.
"Why should I have to?! Why don't you?!" Hugo rasped.
"Because it's dark and scary up there! And I'm not the deranged lunatic here!" Bart ranted. Hugo was sewing his dolls together.
"Why don't you bunk with Oscar?" Bart asked Hugo.
"Because he wets the bed..." said Hugo making a grossed out face.
Bart groaned in disgust too. "Yeah but that's why he wears diapers and plastic pants to keep the bed dry..."
One afternoon Bart was watching TV when there was a commercial for another latest toy. Bart immediately wants it.
"Here we go again..." Marge sighs.
She was discussing with Homer their finances. Apparently they're in trouble, again...
"I'll get a second job, one that pays well. You think those guys on Friends need another friend?" Homer asked.
Marge was baffled. "Homer no... think of something sensible...."
"Moooom! New toy! Want!" Bart whined.
They go back to the toy store to get the said toy.
However Homer sees another giant floor keyboard.
"Dad no!" Lisa warns him.
"Dad yes!" Bart contradicts her.
Homer starts playing the Simpsons theme on the keyboard. However store clerks grab Homer to try to drag him away from the keyboard but he fights them off and finishes his song before breaking the keyboard again....
It hurts everyone's ears with a painful screech.
Bart sighed and took Oscar to look for the toys. Bart was looking at the action figures.
However Oscar embarrassed him by looking through and cuddling the teddy bears.
"Haaaaaaw!" Oscar cooed as he hugged a big soft teddy bear.
The apples in Springfield were always the best in the autumn. That random, seemingly insignificant fact is what had brought young Oscar into his foster parents' backyard. That, among other things.
"Bumpkin do you really want the New neighbours at Ned's old house seeing you play outside in nothing but your diaper..." Marge sighed.
"Yes..." said Oscar twirling his diaper covered butt. His diaper crinkled.
Bart's treehouse tree grew apples in autumn/fall. Red shiny apples were growing.
Bart was in his treehouse playing with his yo-yo. He saw Oscar wandering about wearing a diaper. He rolled his eyes.
Ralph sat in Maggie's sandbox held his blue yo-yo above his mouth and was lowering it into his mouth.
"Ralph.... don't eat your yo-yo..." Bart groaned.
At Sprawlmart Homer was offered a job.
"Sir. How would you like to be a full-time Sprawl-Mart greeter?" A guy asked.
"Is there a chance for advancement?" asked eagerly.
"No." said the guy.
"Then no..." Homer frowned.
"Okay fine you're assistant manager if I see good behaviour from you..." the supervisor sighed.
"Woohoo!" Homer cheered.
"♪ Alouette, gentil alouette, alouette, je te plumerai.♪
♪ Alouette, gentil alouette, alouette, je te plumerai.♪" He is singing in French. Bart's French in his Mom's side.
"Keep it down, you frog!" Oscar yelled.
"Limey..." Bart replied.
Elsewhere the sort of evil EPA guys. Well to Mr Burns they're evil. Well they do nag and interfere. Well the two guys were bickering.
"Look, we can't keep stopping at every "sop," "yeld" or "one vay" sign. Just move on." said one of the sinister EPA guys as they drove about.