Simpsons Fanon

Oh Brother, Where Bart Thou? During a power cut one snow day Bart is bored and finds Maggie and Lisa playing by doing a fashion catwalk show. Bart joins in only to be embarrassed when they put Hello Kitty pyjama bottoms on him. He then gets a little envious and wants a baby brother. Despite everything he tries his plans to get Marge pregnant end in failure.

Meanwhile Bart’s friends make a South Park joke and Otto kills Kenny/Ralph! Then Bart’s dreams come true when a little orphan called Charlie runs away from his orphanage to live with Bart. But Bart finds he is not good big brother material.


The title gag is Homer in a lawnchair with balloons again.

The couch gag is the furniture dancing to loud music!! The Simpsons run in and see this. “Hey!” Homer tells off the furniture and it returns to normal and the Simpsons sit down on the couch.

One snowy day Homer and Lisa are watching a TV programme hosted by some guy about how candy is made.

Homer gargles and drools.

“But here are the candy themed titles to whet your appetite folks!” said the host.

The host is a wrapped candy. He screams.

Then he is by a conveyor belt of Hershey kisses as one of them looks like his head.

Then he watches cookies get made.

“Mmmmmmm!” said Homer.

Then the host starts off the show explaining how gumdrops are made.

“They are made of gelatine. Which is made from the skin, bones and hooves of only the sickest horses!” said the host. Lisa is horrified as live footage of horses is shown being killed and slaughtered.

“Aaaaaaagh! Dad! Turn it over! Turn it over!”

“No dad! Keep it on! Keep it on!” Bart cheered.

“I’m trying Lisa!” Homer whined tapping the remote desperately.

“Dad! You just made it louder!” Lisa yelled.

Eventually they changed the channel.

“And now the Emmy award for best lighting goes to...” said a lady.

Homer screamed.

“Back to the horses!!” He put the candy program of horses dying back on.

Some time later he was at the window with Lisa watching the snow fall down.

“Wow look at all this snow, you wouldn’t think we were suffering from global warning...” said Homer.

“Dad! Global warming causes extreme weather conditions at both ends of the spectrum! Hot and cold...” said Lisa.

“So you’re saying warming makes it colder... Well aren’t you the queen of crazy land! I’m Lisa Simpson! Everything say is the opposite! Lalalala!” Homer dances around mocking Lisa.

“Really, Dad? Really?!” Lisa sighed as he danced about and sung and went out the room.

The next morning it was still snowing.

Jimbo and his gang were on a sled being pulled by nerds that they were whipping.

“Faster dorks!” said Jimbo whipping them.

“I’m in a team!” said Ralph.


In the kitchen Bart in his pyjamas was listening to the radio announcing which schools were closed.

“Mom I can’t hear the radio announcements...” said Bart.

Super Nintendo Chalmers was deliberately listing every school except Bart’s. “Springfield high school, Springfield middle school, Springfield Elementary... (Bart is excited) school of performing arts... (Chalmers and Skinner laughing)”

Oscar gets up and goes off somewhere with his gun. Bart hears the front door slam and Oscar’s jeep drive off. Then he hears a gun cock on the radio and Chalmers and Skinner unnerved by something. “And er Springfield Elementary school. That’s your school Bart.” said Chalmers frightened.

Bart rolled his eyes at Oscar’s attempts to help.

Bart later gets dressed in his winter clothes. “Snow day!” He cheers and runs outside. But a strong cold wind blows him back in and he back flips onto the couch and a maths book lands in his hands.

“What a smart way to spend a snow day!” said Marge praising him for doing his homework.

“Good grief...” said Bart. He threw his maths book away and went upstairs. A Woodstock bird from Peanuts comics flew about the house making Woodstock’s sounds.

Bart played a violent video game.

“Head shot! Head shot!” said the game every time he got a head shot as he killed snowmen in the game. Coool! I know exactly where I’m going with this.... “put that in your pipe and smoke it!” said Bart. “Cooool! I’m stabbing him with his own carrot nose! Ahhhh! Ice loogies!”

“Even in the icy Siberia, I have powers! Political powers!” said Oscar doing that em accent Milhouse was doing in Bart Sells his Soul with a tank. He tapped a button on his controller and Abraham Lincoln with a chain, Teddy Roosevelt, Chairman Mao, Gandhi with a nuclear bomb and Rameses attacked the snowmen.

“It’s showtime!!” Abraham Lincoln yelled.

“Oz, did I say you could join in...” Bart sighed.

Suddenly the power went out.

“That tree must have fell on the power line!” said Bart. “Hmmmm! I’ll just watch TV.” He tries to put the TV on but it will not work without power. “This calls for Static boy!” he rubs a balloon on his head and uses static electricity to power the TV. It flickers on and off.

“Allow me, Electric man to help!” said a Peter Griffin in red footsy pyjamas and Meg’s bedroom curtain as a cape as his alter ego Electric man used a stronger dose of static with Bart’s to power the TV. It stayed on but flickering ever so slightly.

“Nice one Electric Man!” said Bart.

“Stay in your mom’s church.” said Electric Man.

“Nope.” said Bart.

Marge found Peter Griffin in pyjamas powering the TV with static electricity weird.

“Hmmmmmm! Bart nothing electrical will work in a power cut. And who’s that man in his pyjamas...” said Marge.

“They carry static electricity. I am Electric Man!” Peter zapped Marge and ran away.


Bart went about the darkened house. There were flashing lights and a loud video game in the attic. Bart curious went up there.

Hugo was sat on his futon playing Bonestorm loudly but the TV and Console were not hooked up to the mains, but instead a giant Tesla coil. It buzzed with arcs of electricity.

“Hugo how is that working...?” Bart asked.

“Lemon battery and the magic of mad science...” Hugo explained having hooked up lemons to the Tesla coil.

Bart rolled his eyes.

He went downstairs and found Lisa and Maggie playing a catwalk fashion show dressing up in stupid outfits.

Maggie is stumbling in high heeled shoes too big for her and wearing a giant foam novelty hand from a baseball game on her head.

“Diapers never looked so dapper.” said Lisa into a microphone.

Baby Oscar in a diaper giggled.

Bart sweat dropped.

“What are you two doing?” Bart asked.

Lisa turned off her radio which must have the same demonic sorcerous electrical powers as Maggie’s radio that it can work in a power cut.

“Having a catwalk fashion show. Go away...” said Lisa as Maggie walked down the catwalk.

“Actually I’m bored. I want to play.” said Bart.

“Okay put these on and sort out that attitude! Come on people!” Lisa took her role as director of a fashion shoot way too seriously.

Bart was then modelling on the catwalk. A wooden ramp Lisa set up.)

“And here is Bart modelling a Nelson vest, a school tie on his head like a karate expert, red liquorice belt and Hello Kitty pyjama bottoms.” said Lisa.

“Hello Kitty?! I thought they were Spider-Man heads! Eew! Eeeeew!” Bart tried desperately to get the Hello Kitty pyjama bottoms off.

Lisa laughed.

“How comes you and Maggie get along so well?” Bart asked. “And I’m all alone?”

“Because dear brother, we’re sisters and will have a bond that will last forever that you’ll never understand...” said Lisa. “And you won’t ever feel that bond because you’ll never have a brother...”

“Lis, I have Hugo...” said Bart. “Even if we don’t get along...”

Hugo laughed maniacally.

“I meant a little brother...” said Lisa.

“Sure I will! Just get Dad to knock up Mom again and get her pregnant again!” said Bart.

“Bart do you even know how that works?! Even if Mom got pregnant and kept the baby. It could be another sister...” said Lisa.

Bart horrified had that day dream about Sex and the City again where Grown up Lisa, Maggie and an unnamed sister were dragging Bart about clothes shopping and making him carry their stuff.

“Come on Bart! I want to go to Tiffany’s!” said Lisa.

“Ungh.... Why? You have enough jewellery...” Bart groaned carrying bags and hat boxes.

“For breakfast! I want a croissant!” said Lisa.

“Lisa you can’t buy food in a jewellery store...” said Bart.

“Yes you can! They have breakfast at Tiffany’s now!” said Lisa. A studio audience groans.

We pan over to grown up Oscar as a street busker playing his guitar. “So I said what about, breakfast at Tiffany’s? She said I think I, remember the film I...” Oscar sings the song Breakfast at Tiffany’s by Deep Blue Something badly. People yell at him to shut up.

Bart’s dream ends and he shakes his head.

“That’s not gonna happen! Everyone knows it goes Boy, girl, boy, girl. But Maggie had to be a girl and I had to be twins. So God owes us another boy! There!” said Bart.

“Sure Bart. That makes real sense...” said Lisa.

Bart groans and storms off, oh should I say wades off with his hello Kitty pyjama bottoms at his ankles because they won’t come off. Lisa laughs at his predicament.

“Ha! Jokes on you Lisa! These are too tight so I’ll stretch them!”

Lisa stopped laughing and gasped as she realised she ruined a set of pyjamas she liked.


That night Lisa was reading Alice Through the Looking Glass apparently but getting the characters wrong. Or reading a pop up book adaptation of the Through the looking glass movie... does that even exist yet.

“Off with their heads! said the Red Queen!” said Lisa.

“It’s the Queen of hearts that says Off with their heads doofus! Read the actual books! And not the Disney adaptation!” said Oscar reading the actual Alice in Wonderland books.

“But it’s a pop up of the live action movie! With Helen Bonham Carter as the red Queen and Professor Snape as the caterpillar!” said Lisa. “Pull the tabs Maggie.”

Maggie pulled the tabs and the book popped up the er pop ups. Mmmmmm! Time share condo...

“Of course you ought to, you stupid girl! Fifty points from Gryffindor!” said the caterpillar. God bless Snape Caterpillar...

Bart who was watching his sisters play sighed and went up to the attic to play with his brother Hugo.

Hugo was performing a science experiment as green glowing chemical lit the dark attic up with an eerie green glow. Hugo was laughing maniacally.

Bart rolled his eyes and went down to the landing to go to his room and to go to bed. He dreamed of brothers.

He dreamed of the Smother Brothers arguing. “No you’re stupid!”

”No you’re stupid!”

Wright brothers flying an early plane. and an early penny farthing style bike. Wilbur, riding the Penny Farthing whines at Orville who is riding the early plane.

”I’m the underachiever and proud of it. I wouldn’t even know who the Wright Brothers are...” Bart in the dream addressed the fourth wall.

Well this episode is stupid because it ignores Hugo!

The Marx brothers with gag Groucho Marx glasses, noses and moustaches throwing pies at each other and performing clownish antics.

Oscar was in the dream insisting that the revolutionist economist who helped stir up communism in Russia, Karl Marx was a Marx brother.

Bart sweat dropped.

Bart then dreamt of the Baldwin brothers. Yes all of them. They were hanging about having fun.

Then he dreamt of the Manning brothers. Um they play football.

Then he dreamt of Mario and Luigi jumping down a green pipe. Coooool!

”Coooool! Mario...” said imaginary Oscar.

Bart sweat dropped.

Then the Blues brothers dancing.

And the Smith Brothers coughing.

Then he dreamed of Sideshow Bob and his brother Cecil holding hands and skipping while murdering Barts that kept appearing.

“No brother! No brother! No brother!” The chopped up Barts repeated.

Bart woke up screaming.

Plot 2[]

Bart woke up from his nightmare.

“Who or what are the Manning brothers? Besides football...”

“Well it’s a good thing you don’t have a brother, he might end up with your brain! Ha!” said Lisa.

“Uh I’m his brother and your brother and Maggie’s...” said Hugo. “And I have an IQ of 200.”

“Oscar stop breaking canon!” Lisa yelled.

Bart sighed.

Bart dressed himself up for the bad weather. His dad was outside sorting out the cause of the magic frosty wind that blew him inside yesterday. It was Old Man Winter!

Old Man Winter, actually Grampa in a red Christmas themed set of footed pyjamas was laughing and holding a wooden knobbly stick.

“Ha! I cast a blizzard upon your house! What are you gonna do about it? Huh?” said Old Man Winter/Grampa.

“Okay Dad get outta here...” said Homer taking his father off screen.

“I’m cold and lonely...” Grampa whined.

“Dad, I want a brother.” said Bart.

“You have a brother! What’s his name... Hugo!” said Homer.

Hugo ran around in the snow barefoot and laughing maniacally.

“I meant a baby brother...” said Bart.

“Sorry but I ain’t changing anymore diapers than Maggie’s or Grampas...” said Homer.

“But Lisa got Maggie!” Bart whined.

“Bart. Girls are easy. Girls like Daddy! They marry hockey players so Daddy gets free tickets to the game! They don’t steal Daddy’s knives, and I don’t have to tell them how their body works because I don’t know!” said Homer.

“You never told me how my body works!” said Bart.

“I meant when you hit puberty! I will then!” said Homer.


Bart and his friends Milhouse, Nelson and Ralph did a South Park reference. Bart was Stan, Milhouse was Kyle, Nelson was Cartman and Ralph was Kenny.

“Guys I’ve got something to tell you...” said Bart as Stan.

“Are you breaking up with me?” Milhouse asked.

“No! I want a baby brother but my parents said no.” said Bart.

“Why don’t you just trick them? Swap your mom’s birth control for tic tacs. Cook them a romantic meal spiked with viagra... summon the god of sex Tyrannosaurus Sex...” said Nelson as Cartman.

“Nelson, I get you’re the bully in my social group but can our Cartman be someone not so likeable and endearing?” said Bart.

“Know any fat racists at school?” Nelson asked.

“No.” said Bart Stan.

“Then I’m Cartman then.” said Nelson.

“Remember when Ralph thought he had a baby brother but it turned out to be a pine cone?” Milhouse Kyle asked.

“Mmmmmmmrrrrmmmphhhhmmmmhmmmmhmmm!” Ralph as Kenny in an orange parka muffled.

“Yes Ralph exactly.” said Bart Stan.

Otto Mann accidentally ran Ralph over knocking him flying off somewhere with the bus.

“Oh no! I killed Kenny!” Otto yelled.

“No you killed Ralph.” said Bart.

“Who did I kill yesterday then?” Otto asked.

“You bastard!” Milhouse as Kyle yelled.

“Okay this joke has run its course...” said Bart as Stan.


Bart tried everything from cooking his parents a romantic meal. It just made them full and tired.

Bart dressed as Gordon Ramsay snapped a spoon in half frustrated.

Bart somehow got his hands on a DVD of the Karma Sutra. Eeeeeeeew!

“Oh Homie! Look what the snuggle fairy left us...” said Marge in a sing song voice holding the Karma Sutra DVD.

“Oh! People in other countries doing it!” said Homer.

They put the DVD in.

“(Homer screams with laughter) Look that guy looks like Apu!” said Homer laughing.

“Sssssh! We don’t want the kids knowing we’re watching this...” said Marge.

Lisa shivered in disgust as she heard Indian music playing.

Marge and Homer were trying to play twister... uh I think but there was a horrid crunch as they tried to do a complex manoeuvre and then they screamed in agony.

The next day Homer’s arm was in a sling. And Marge had a neck brace as Lisa treated them with a medical kit.

Bart frustrated and sat with a bowl of cereal snapped his spoon.

He went to a sewer outlet where Jimbo and his gang were spitting into a river.

“What do you want doofus? Can’t you see we’re hawing loogies?” Dolph interrogated him. The bullies spat loogies.

“I wished I hawked that loogie!” said Kerne.

“I want a baby brother but I can’t get my parents to do the nasty!” said Bart.

“Doofus. Eventually every set of parents ends up doing the nasty eventually...” said Jimbo.

“Mine do it the one magical time the prison and the lunatic asylum both have a mass break out!” said Kerne.

“All you have to worry about is the pill.” said Jimbo to Bart.

“The pill what’s that?” Bart asked.

“You don’t know what the pill is?!” Dolph asked.

“No! You older boys are supposed to tell me these things instead of just beating me up!” said Bart. “Except for when I was in kindergarten and you thought I was cute because I kept singing Butt Man.”

“Okay. Listen...” Jimbo told Bart about the pill.


Bart tried to replace Marge’s pills with tic tacs but got caught.

“Bartholomew Simpson!” Marge was cross with him. “You’re a handful but you never interfered with my reproductive freedom before!”

“I want a baby brother. But Dad said we have an Uday we don’t need a Qusay, then he got mad when I reminded him Hugo exists still.” said Bart.

“Ay bitch! That’s not funny!” said Canadian flapping head squeaky voiced Saddam.

“Anyway. I want what Lisa and Maggie have... a bond with each other...” said Bart.

“Hmmmmm! I’m sorry Bart. But your father and I are happy with just three kids. Well four now that social services have forced us to look after Hugo as well.” said Marge. “Besides the new baby might not be a boy. They might be another girl.”

Bart had his day dream about Sex and the City and being dragged around the shops by Lisa, Maggie and their new sister.

“You’re right Mom. I’m sorry I messed with your birth control pills. I won’t ever do it again.” said Bart.

“That’s okay dear.” said Marge.


Bart went to an orphan.

“One boy please! And don’t skimp on the freckles!” said Bart.

“A ten year old can’t adopt a child.” said the lady at the desk.

“Stand aside buddy. They say these a hundred dollar notes make you go blind...” said Oscar bribing the lady.

“I can’t see anything! Go in and take your pick!” said the lady taking the bribe.

Bart smirked and went in to take an orphan.

“If you were going this route why don’t you let me be your honorary baby brother until Marge and Homer do the nasty? I’m one year younger than you!” said Oscar.

“Because you’re annoying...” said Bart.

They didn’t realise a little boy wanted to be adopted by them and was following them around without them knowing.

They left unable to find any boys.

Bart was sleeping in one morning when he was woken by a very young boy telling him to wake up.

“Wake up! Wake up big bro!” said the boy.

Bart woke up to find a little boy sat on his bed. He must have been about six years old. He had scruffy clothes like a street urchin and was wearing a green wooly hat.

“Ugh... What the!” Bart gasped. “I’m Bart Simpson! Who the hell are you?”

“Charlie. I’m your new baby brother. I escaped from the orphanage.” said Charlie the orphan.

“Wow! My dream came true!” said Bart. “So what do you want to be when you grow up?”

“A one armed drummer in a prison rock band.” said Charlie.

“Cool!” said Bart.

They were looking about the house looking out for Marge and Lisa the snitch. They weren’t about luckily.

“So how comes you were never adopted?” Bart asked.

“People only want to adopt babies.” said Charlie.

“We have a baby here somewhere.” said Bart.

Maggie was making bedroom eyes at Charlie and blowing him kisses.

“Keep walking sistah...” said Bart.


Marge is talking to Homer while cooking.

“Bart seems happier now and no longer going on about wanting a baby brother.” said Marge.

“Yeah that’s never gonna happen anyway. Maggie has already left her cute phase and got into the gross toddler phase...” said Homer.

Maggie was sleeping in her play pen just wearing a diaper. She was drooling in her sleep and coughing and scratching her butt.

Marge sighed.

Bart was going out with Charlie.

“Going out Mom.” said Bart.

“Okay dear.” said Marge. They didn’t notice Charlie. Hehehehe!

“Did you notice the little kid following Bart?” Homer asked.

“Nope...” Marge sighed.


Bart went outside the Try N Save and put Charlie in the penny plane ride.

“Bart these rides are for babies...” Charlie whined.

“It’s just while Boy with Shades is lurking about.” said Bart.

Boy with Shades watched Charlie reluctantly rode the penny plane ride.

“Now you can’t question that is not normal.” said Bart as during Fat Man and Little Boy, The Boy with Shades was looking at him with interest as he rode a penny ride. One of those little cheap rideable planes and other cartoon things outside super markets.

Boy with Shades shrugged his shoulders.

Plot 3[]

Bart took Charlie to school and carried him about on his shoulders.

“He’s my Little brother.” said Bart.

“No he’s not! You pinched him from an orphanage!” said Milhouse. Bart hand gagged him.

“No I didn’t! He ran away to live with me! Now if you know what’s good for you, you’d keep your mouth shut!” said Bart.

Milhouse nodded. He would try not to squeal.

“What maturity level is he at?” Oscar asked Bart. “Does he still yell Bum and poo!?”

“No! Kids his age don’t do that!” said Bart.

“I can speak for myself Bart. And no that is so kindergarten.... I’ve outgrown that phase...” said Charlie.

“I never did! I still love shouting Bum and poo!” said Oscar enthusiastically. “Bum! Bum! Poo!” He he yelled.

“Oz!” Bart whined at his immature behaviour.


Marge then started feeling broody. Oh dear...

“Homer I want another Baby.” said Marge.

“What?! And you have Maggie.” Homer gasped before explaining bluntly that she already has a baby to look after.

“I mean a baby baby!” said Marge. “Maggie’s soft spot on her skull is gone now all her bones are properly fused together. And well um...”

Maggie was in her playpen snoring and snorting while drooling and scratching herself.

“Does she always just do that?” Homer asked.

“Hmmmmmm... it’s not very lady like is it...?” Marge asked. “I think she takes after her Aunts Patty and Selma than me...”


At school Bart managed to get Oscar to shut up and stop yelling bum across the playground.

“So how comes we’ve never seen Charlie around school then?” Milhouse asked.

“My parents hid him away because he had two noses. So he was kept hidden until they could afford the operation to remove one of them.” said Bart.

“That’s plausible considering your parents locked Hugo away.” said Milhouse.

“Sometimes I wish they still did...” said Bart sighing as Hugo was sewing a pigeon to a frog.

“Why are you doing this I want a brother thing when you have Hugo?” Milhouse asked.

“Because I want a baby brother who’ll look up to me. Not a psychotic twin...” said Bart.

Hugo was laughing maniacally from somewhere.


Then Bart decided to let Lisa in on what he had done. Um bad idea.

“Lisa, what’s it like having to share a bathroom with two boys now?” said Bart showing off Charlie.

“Bart! Where did that boy come from?!” Lisa gasped.

“Relax he’s an orphan. Like Annie but he’s a dude and he hates tomorrow.” said Bart.

“I hate it so much!” said Charlie.

“Bart! You have to give him back!” Lisa nagged.

“Nuh Uh. I finally have what you and Maggie have. An eternal bond of brotherhood. Except ours doesn’t suck.” said Bart.

Bart took Charlie to the Kwik e Mart. And bought him a squishee.

“So how did you escape the island of misfit boys?” Bart asked.

“Shimmied down the drain pipe.” said Charlie.

“I love shimmying!” said Bart.

Bart thought that letting Lisa in on what happened just to boast to her was a bad idea.

“Now that blabs-a-lot knows about you we better make the most of what little time we have.” said Bart

“I don’t want to leave you Bart!” Charlie said tearfully.

“I know Charlie. But if I know my sister she’s probably already blabbed to mom and dad...” said Bart.

But Lisa hadn’t told Mom and Dad yet. However at school Bart had an embarrassing secret.

In his locker was a ginger Afro like Disco Stu’s and a red dress.

“Errr...” Charlie asked.

“Charlie don’t look in other’s lockers!” Bart admonished him.

“Bart get ready for rehearsals for tonight’s production of Annie. Where you’re Annie.” said Skinner.

Bart blushed and dressed as Annie with the wig and dress.

Charlie laughed.

“Good grief...” said Bart.

At home at lunch time Bart was teaching Charlie how to make a PB and J sandwich. Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. “The secret to a good PB and J is no J double PB.” said Bart making a sandwich.

“Then it’s not a PB and J sandwich then. It’s just Peanut butter...” said Oscar.

“That’s besides the point Oz and...” said Bart but Oscar suddenly started singing the noodle song from PB and J Otter.


On evening Bart did something irresponsible with Charlie. He took him to see an R rated Horror movie.

“Ah Sever V is on! Maybe we might get to watch it without my mom interrupting it!” said Bart. He took Charlie into the cinema to see the film. Somehow they got tickets to see an R rated film.

However Charlie was frightened of the film. He was shivering and hiding under Bart’s seat.

“It’s not real Charlie. Well part of it is based on the events. Wow the blood is realistic!” said Bart.

Charlie was hiding under Bart’s seat shivering.

On the way home Charlie was still traumatised.

,ah! The boogeyman wants to eat my brains!” Charlie cried.

“Smart kid...” said the boogeyman from a sewer.

“Oh gee... I really am a bad brother! Why did I think it was a good idea to take a little kid to see a horror movie?” Bart said to himself as he comforted Charlie.

Then Wiggum arrived.

“A,right Bart, you’re busted! Hand over the orphan...” said Wiggum.

“Wiggum? How do you know Charlie is missing?” Bart asked.

“Because his orphanage has been on high alert. This isn’t the first time he has escaped you know...” said Wiggum.

“Chief take me away from him! That bad boy showed me a scary movie!” Charlie betrayed Bart and went to Wiggum willingly.

“With pleasure Charlie, let’s get you back- Aghhhhh! My eyes! It burns!” Charlie had sprayed mace in Wiggum’s eyes. He ran off with Bart.

“That was all an act to mace Wiggum?” Bart asked.

“Of course Bart.” said Charlie.

“okay but we have to find shelter. We can use that mound of snow as an igloo!” said Bart.

They hid inside a mound of snow.

Lisa eventually found them.

“Bart you have to give Charlie back.” said Lisa.

“Not on your life Blabber mouth! Now we have to live in an igloo now because of you!”

“I haven’t said anything to anyone yet!” said Lisa. “If anything it’s probably the orphanage wondering where Charlie is.

Bart was refusing to talk.

“How do you even intend to look after a kid anyway?! Have you thought about anything besides this crummy shelter that could bury you both alive at any moment? Like what to feed him? How to get him clothes?”

“I’ll think of something. As long as I don’t feed him after midnight I’ll be fine...” said Bart.

Suddenly the snow thy hollowed out collapsed on them burying them alive.

“Bart!” Lisa cried.

“We’re trapped!” Charlie cried.

“Don’t worry Charlie. Remember what I told you. Point and squirt.” said Bart.

Lisa heard flies being undone and the snow melted and hissed as Bart and Charlie made escape holes by peeing on the snow. Eeeeeeeew!

“Did ya miss us Lisa?” Bart said smugly.

“Eeeeeeew!” Lisa groaned.

“I need a moment to finish!” said Charlie peeing.

“Eeeeeeeew!” Lisa groaned. “What next you do a montage to the poster of the Adam Sandler movie Big Daddy?

Bart and Charlie were peeing on a front door of a building.

“Hey! Stop peeing on my door!” A guy in a vest upstairs yelled at them.

Next door Adam Sandler and a little boy were peeing on another door.

“You know Charlie, the boy is played by twins...” said Bart.

“Just don’t let Attic Bart eat my brains please!” Charlie shivered.

Bart went home to have serious words with Hugo.

“Hugo what did you do to scare Charlie?! He got frightened during an Adam Sandler joke!” said Bart annoyed and angry with Hugo.

“I just wanted to perform a little science experiment with him...” said Hugo.

“Well don’t!” Bart told him off.


Eventually Bart agreed that Charlie had to return to his orphanage. He went to visit him only to find to his dismay, and Charlie’s, that Charlie had been adopted by an upperclass family with lots of girls. Charlie squirmed and tried to run away as the girls poked him and pulled at his ears and clothes and called him cute. He tried to run away but they caught him by his underwear which stretched as he struggled before yanking him back.

At home.

“Well that was an adventure Bart had this episode.” said Lisa.

“Everyone I have news! I’m pregnant!” said Marge.

“D’oh!” Homer groaned.

The end.