Simpsons Fanon

Mountain of Madness Marge is concerned about Homer's mental state during a snow storm at their mountain retreat when he has vivid hallucinations and becomes Shinning Homer again after the food runs out. Then in another story Mr Burns gets very hyper on coffee.


The couch gag is Grampa sleeping in the couch bed when the Simpsons come in and fold up the couch, whim him still in bed and then sitting on the couch.

Cabin Fever

The family are going to the mountains for a Swiss inspired holiday.

“Where are we gong Mom?” Bar asked.

“To our winter retreat in Mount Syllabub.” said Marge.

“Why?” Bart asked.

“Because that’s what we do every winter. Well until we stopped after you got that tattoo...” said Marge.

“I could have killed that Mervin when I found out he gave you that Tattoo...” said Homer. “I mean why?! A tattoo? An ear piercing? A stolen video game?! I have to look after all four of my children now?! Even the screwy one?!” Homer ranted about how everything has gone wrong.

Hugo frowned while reading a Jules Verne Book.

“Can I read that after you, Hugo?” Lisa asked.

“No. Because it’s my copy of 20,000 Leagues under the sea!” Hugo rolled his eyes as he read. “And you wouldn’t enjoy it how I am enjoying it...”

“The portrayal of Captain Neto’s hatred of the outside world and his slow descent into supervillainy?” Lisa asked.

“No! His awesome nuclear submarine and the giant squid attack! Mwuhahahaha!” Hugo laughed maniacally.

Lisa sighed.

“Coooool! Lemme see!” Bart looked in Hugo’s book.

“Sure bro!” said Hugo letting him read the book.

“Hey! There are no pictures! Only words!” Bart whined.

“You have to use your imagination, Bart... I don’t suppose you got your fair share of brain cells and instead they all went to me...” said Hugo.

“Hmmmmm! I’d appreciate the intellectual sparring we could have Hugo if you didn’t fill your boy genius brain with wacky ideas of giant squid attacks and zombie Albert Einstein....”

“But those things are cool! Science doesn’t have to be dull just because you make it so!” said Hugo.

”I gotta pee...” Oscar whined.

”Tough, you should have gone before left.” said Homer.

Oscar groaned.

“And here we are, kids! Mount Syllabub!” said Homer as they pulled up.

Once there, they unpack. The kids want to go out and play and Hugo is biting everyone again.

"Hugo! Stop biting!" Marge scolds him, the kids go out and play. Bart starts throwing snowballs at Lisa.

"Ow! That one had a rock in it! I'm telling!" Lisa whined.

Oscar meanwhile needed a pee so he began urinating in the snow.

"Eeeeeew! Oscar!" Bart whined. "Nobody touch any yellow snow! Oscar's just gone to the bathroom..." Oscar blushed as he pulled up his trousers.

"Eeeeew!" Lisa groaned. "He even managed to write his name..."

“The snow on that peak looks highly unstable by my calculations. It could collapse with the right volume of noise.” said Hugo.

“Shut up Smartypants...” said Homer groaning as he unpacked.

“Dad! Don’t be so rude to him! He’s right! These sums all add up! I really think we should have waited until spring...” said Lisa.

“But then it wouldn’t be a winter holiday...” Homer explained in a matter of fact way.

Lisa grumbled like Marge annoyed at her Dad.

“Cooool! Are you saying there might be an avalanche?!” said Bart eagerly.

“With the right volume of sound...” said Hugo.

Bart laughed evilly and rubbed his hands. He clapped a short hard clap.

Nothing happened.

“You’ll have to be louder than that...” Hugo sighed.

Oscar belched loudly. There was a rumbling sound as the snow started to come loose.

“Oscar that’s disgusting! Excuse yourself!” Marge told Oscar off.

“Guys, stop trying to cause an avalanche...” Lisa sighed.

Homer dropped something on his foot and swore. The mountain tremors got even more violent.

“Close...” said Hugo adjusting his specs.

“There’s only one animal that can cause an avalanche and that’s a polarchuck. And they’re not real in this universe...” said Oscar.

“Is that a Polarchuck?” Bart asked as the camera panned up to a cute cartoon bear cub with a big shiny nose and buck teeth grinning.

“Uh Yep.” Oscar gulped.

The Polachuck cleared his throat and yodelled loudly a cartoon yodel.

The mountain shook violently and the Simpsons were buried in an avalanche.

“Stupid yodelling, bear cub...” Homer groaned.


That night there was a blizzard and more avalanches from yodelling cartoon polar bear cubs so they were snowed in.

"We're trapped!" Bart tried the door but it was frozen.

Lisa tried a window, it opened but snow came in and piled up around her. "I think there's been an avalanche..."

"Hrrrm! I guess we'll have to stay inside." Marge sighed as they put on their winter clothes to stay warm, even Hugo was feeling the cold and wrapped up warm.

They decided to unpack.

”I really don’t want to have to wear my diapers because that polarchuck might sniff me.” Oscar groaned.

The polarchuck was sniffing the air with his big wet shiny black nose. Oscar grimaced.

They told stories to preoccupy themselves. However Homer's took a surreal turn...

"That night your mother told me the horrible truth that she was indeed pregnant again..." Homer narrated.

Homer in the story was on the bed on his knees. "We're doomed! Doooomed! Aaaaaaaaaagh!" His head inflated and popped like a balloon.

"Homer! Stop that! That didn't really happen!" Marge nagged. Bart and Oscar were laughing.

"Oh yeah? Well I have a photographic memory, and I remember it clearly..." Homer retorted.

In the story Handsome Pete, the midget clown came in to the master bedroom and danced while playing an accordion. He was playing sailor music.

"Homer..." Marge sighed as Homer jazzed up his story with stupid randomness.

"Who wants to hear what happened at last week's town meeting?" Homer asked.

"Oh me! Me! Me!" The kids yelled.

Homer painted a surreal picture where Marge had green hair and blue hair curlers in her hair and wearing a rainbow colored necklace. She was holding a rolling pin and boring everyone with a long winded reason for not wanting a casino.

"There was also Naude with a head on a spring, a three headed Apu, Ned was wearing a baseball glove, I was glamorous having just spent a month at the gym lifting weights... (Homer imagines himself with muscles) oh and there was a bearded baby and a penguin on Dr Hibbert's head, but I don't know why..."

"That's enough!" Marge yelled.

"Yeah Dad, Bart and Oscar might like your bizarre stories, but we don't!" Lisa added.

"Come on dear, I'll tell you what really happened..." Marge and Lisa went into the bedroom.

“As much as your stories are funny Homer, I’m of to play some video games.” said Oscar going off to his room to play his Gameboy.

"Anyway, where was I before your mother interrupted..." Homer asked.

"You had just hit the gym, Mom with green hair and rainbow pearls was nagging to a whole room of surreal nutty people." Bart explained. "Please let there be head exploding too..."

"Bart, not everything needs my head exploding to make it cool..." Homer sighed. He got back to telling his story. "Anyway so Green haired Marge, glamorous me just after a few lifts at the gym, head on a spring Maude, Three headed Apu, Ned with a baseball glove, someone had a penguin on their head, a bearded baby and an alligator in a suit were being bored to death by your mother's nagging when an octopus passed me the phone..." Homer painted the story.

"It's the president for you, Homer." said an off screen octopus as a tentacle passed Homer a phone.

"So I said "Get this Mr President!"" Homer explained to the kids who were getting bored with the nonsensical ramblings.


"Mom, why does Dad tell such weird stories..." Lisa asked as she sat in bed trying to keep warm.

"Hrrrrm... Your father has a very active imagination..." Marge sighed.

“I think I can dig us out.” said Oscar.

“No Oscar! Without tunnel buttresses and supports you’ll be buried alive! Just wait until mountain rescue arrive!” said Lisa warning him.

We pan to the top of the snow drift where wolves, the feral kind are sniffing and growling as they dig into the snow to get to the Simpsons...

“Oh I’m not digging. My tame Polarchuck will! And his tunnels won’t collapse because of cartoon physics. The best kind of physics...” said Oscar summoning a Polarchuck. It dug into the snow from the window by Lisa’s bed by eating the snow...

“I thought the main thing in his universe was the danger of falling snow blocks...” Said Bart.

“D’oh!” Oscar groaned. The polarchuck was flushed out his tunnel along with snow from it collapsing.

“I’ll find us some wood to build buttresses...” Hugo sighed.

The polarchuck dug himself out of the snow.

“What’s that annoying yodelling polar bear cub? You want me to put the pee bucket on your head?” Bart asked deviously while holding the peeing bucket.


Meanwhile Homer and the boys (Bart, Hugo and Oscar were digging through the snow to the surface. Oscar braced the tunnels with wooden frames. Eventually they got the door open. They cheered.

"Good, because supplies are running low..." Marge explained.

"What?!" Homer yelled.

“And if you’re planning on going to the surface watch the the tunnels for Polachuck poo...” Oscar warned.

“Eeeeew!” Everyone groaned.

“So there’s no food?” Homer asked.

“Nope.” said Marge.

“No beer?” Homer asked.

“No sirree.” said Marge. "And no TV."

Homer snapped. “I’ll kill you! I’ll kill all of you!”

The kids screamed.

“Homer!” Marge told him off.

“Sorry. 8 need a moment alone.” said Homer. “I’ll be back later...” he added with an evil grin.

The family passed the time with stories again. This time Homer told the story of his chilli trip,

"Now what do you think it means?" Homer asked.

"That you really like Johnny Cash for some reason?" Bart asked.

Eventually everyone got bored and crazy with isolation. They made snowmen and dressed them in their clothes. Then they started getting cabin fever...

"Urge to kill, rising..." Homer murmured grabbing an axe.

"Aaaaagh! Dad's gone nuts!" Bart yelped.

"Homer! Stop that!" Marge nagged.

"You and what army?" Homer murmured. Suddenly an army of snowmen with pickelhaubes and moustaches appeared around Marge and the kids. Homer gasped in fear. "Stay back! I have powers! (He grew confident) Political powers!" Suddenly Rameses, Gandhi, Abraham Lincoln with a chain, Chairman Mao and Theodore Roosevelt appeared snarling and brandishing weapons.

"It's show time!" Yelled evil Lincoln. The Simpsons and their imaginary armies fought with each other.


Eventually the mountain rescue dug a passage to the Simpsons cabin only to find them fighting each other in their pyjamas.

"Um... we'll be back in a minute..." said the rescuers as the stepped back outside.

Eventually everyone stopped fighting and they got packed and went home. They agreed never to speak of what happened again.

That night at home in his and Marge's bed, Homer dreamed of all his imaginary friends in the town hall having a meeting. It then descended into a wrestling match between Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt.

Plot 2[]

Burns Needs a Pick me Up

One morning in his office Mr Burns was very tired and reluctant to run the plant today.

“Oh my sir. Did you rest well last night?” Smithers asked.

“Yes I did Smithers. But I (Yawns) could sleep for forty more winks if it wasn’t for this plant I need to run. I’ll make myself a coffee!” Mr Burns got up to make himself a coffee but scratch but his trembling hands caused a mess everywhere.

“Um how about I make you a coffee sir?” said Smithers.

“Thank you Smithers.” said Mr Burns sitting back down as a maid cleaned up hi mess.

Sometime later he was drinking coffee. And sometime later he was full of energy running about.

“Whoop de doo mail man! Whoop de doo florist! Whoop de doo President!” Mr Burns said gleefully to a mail man, Howard Jr the florist and Bill Clinton.

“Well I must say it is an honour to be here Montgomery.” said Bill Clinton.

“Whoop de doo tarantula Town!” said Mr Burns to a tank/vivarium full of tarantulas crawling about.

“Whoop de doo employees!” said Mr Burns down the tannoy microphone.

“Wow Mr Burns has gone nuts today...” said Homer in his work station.

“Whoop de doo!” said Mr Burns in a high pitched manner.

Smithers was quite concerned as the caffeine took effect.

“Uh... maybe you should stick to decaf Sir...” said Smithers.

“Everyone who has found love can go home today!” said Mr Burns down the microphone to the plant speakers.

“Yaaaaaaaay!” everyone including Homer cheered and they went home. Except one guy who cried as he stayed alone because he had nobody to love.


Mr Burns then needed a sit down.

“Smithers where is everyone?” Mr Burns asked.

“Um you were really hyper on coffee sir and you sent them all home.”

“By Lucifer’s beard! Get me decaf next time Smithers! I can’t keep losing my inhibitions like that!” said Mr Burns.

“Yes sir. I’ll mKe a note.” said Smithers.

The next day Mr Burns came into his office whistling and walking like Mickey Mouse. He sat down and Smithers offered him tea and coffee.

“Oh no. No caffeine for me today Smithers. I’m already buzzing with energy!” said Mr Burns.

Time passed and he got bored and fell asleep. Someone made him some coffee and he was finishing it revitalised and full of energy. “Let’s do something exciting?”

“Chinese checkers or domestic sir?” Smithers asked.

“Hmmmm, I was thinking a mock safety drill. But which one?”

There was a choice or red buttons labelled as such; “Fire drill, Mad dog Drill, Blimp attack, Meltdown alert and Richard Simmons Robot Attack. I really hope he chooses the Richard Simmons robot one.

Meanwhile in Homer’s station.

”So you’re saying this vent goes straight to Old man Burns’s office?” Homer asked Oscar.

”Yes...” Oscar sighed. “So if my calculations are correct. This ether and Insanity pepper bomb will send vapours straight to his office and drive him insane!” said Oscar.

”Oooooh!” said Homer. “Do we want him insane?”

”The, he’s nice to everybody but thinks you’re Pop N Fresh kind of insane, yes.” said Oscar.

The ether and insanity pepper fu es make Mr Burns woozy.

”Oooooooh...” Nr Burns groaned.

“Sir are you alright?” Smithers asked.

Burnsie hallucinates a cartoon diplodocus dancing to jaunty 1920’s music.

Mr Burns chuckled and danced extremely high or something.


”Yeah but won’t those fumes affect us?” Homer asked Oscar.

”D’oh!” Oscar realised. The fumes started to affect him and Homer.

”Flanders?! What are you doing here?” Homer whined.

”Well what can I Dim dum doodily habba hooey habba hooey...” Mouths and moustaches appear in the air as Ned ripples like a lava lamp. “Gabba gabba hey!”

Homer screams and runs down the halls of the plant as they twist and morph from the hallucinations.

”Goo goo gajoob?” A walrus asked.

”Haw Haw! Ha Haw!” Nelson as a cubism painting laughed in a distorted manner.

Edna Krabappel with six eyes and a chimp muzzle made the trumpet sound grownups make in the Peanuts Comic.

Barney burped and had triangles ripple along his stomach.

Homer screamed and ran off into the oblivion of the twisted dimension of illusions.


A worker comes to Mr Burns while he is high.

”Um Mr Burns?” The fat worker stammers.

Mr Burns hallucinates him as Pop N Fresh Pillsbury dough boy.

“Pop N fresh you delightful tub of goo! I owe your tubes of pastry to my healthy physique!” Mr Burns said joyfully. “I know what to do with you!” He poked Pillsbury’s belly.

Pop n fresh/Pillsbury giggled.

Mr Burns kept poking him.

”Erm Mr Burns I was wondering could I have a raise?” the man asked.

”Oh sure! Anything for you Pop N Fresh.” said Mr Burns.

”Woohoo!” The worker cheered and ran off.

Moleman wanted his broom fixed or given a new head.

”It’s that delightful TV leprechaun! I’m gonna get your lucky charms!” said Mr Burns turning on a power drill.

”Oh no! My brains!” Moleman groaned as we hear a disgusting squishy noise of his skull being drilled into.


Meanwhile in the mass hallucination dimension Oscar and Homer screamed as a giant butterfly flew past.

Homer oozed about.

”Oh I hope I didn’t brain my damage! I better check my pupils!” He looked in a pool of water. His pupils were going nuts. Suddenly the pool turned into a giant yellow and black striped snake. It wrapped Homer and Oscar tightly in its coils and hissed at them.

”Aaaaagh! Snake Jafar!” Oscar screamed.

”Okaaaaay...” said Homer as the snake released them.

Homer then broke the sun by going sun rise sun set repeatedly. He screamed when the sun shattered.

”Okay. Not to self. Don’t do anything...”

He then encounters that stupid turtle again, climbs another pyramid and encounters red space coyote Johnny Cash.

Mr Smithers was hassled by an illusion of Lisa Simpson whining about finding another injured Shrew.

”Mr Smithers! I found another shrew! I think this one twisted it’s ankle!” said Lisa.

”Not now! Must get Mr Burns to return to his faculties before he hurts himself!” said Smithers heading to Burns’s office to get some sense into him.