Simpsons Fanon
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Lord of the Fries: Megabyte Homer, Junior Vice President of Hyperglobalmeganet creates a webpage, a very annoying noisy one with our groovy lord, dancing Jesus. Meanwhile Lisa has a problem with her Malibu Stacy saying phrases that encourage young girls that is okay to be a dumb blonde. Then Homer’s new computer gets a virus so they go inside and visit the CGI cartoon Reboot! And references to Cyberworld at IMAX 3D cinemas.

Plot[]

The chalkboard gag is “I will only provide a urine sample when asked.”

The couch gag is Santa’s Little Helper doing the Snoopy dance until the Simpsons come in and stare at him. He stops and groans and sits down like a normal dog.

Homer is at the gates to the plant but it’s locked up.

“Come on! Open up! I have to get first in line for the box of donuts!” Homer whined shaking the bars of the gates.

Lenny and Carl arrive in a sports car dressed for holiday. “Homer what are you doing? The plants closed for fumigation!” said Lenny.

In the plant Mr Burns set off a can of pesticide but it affected him instantly like the gas grenades in Treehouse of Horror III. “Woooooo.... I was strolling through the gas one day...” he sung then fainted.

Smithers sighed while wearing a gas mask.

“Didn’t you get the email?” Carl asked Homer.

“No. What’s an email?” Homer asked.

“It’s a letter on the computer.” said Lenny.

“Or a silent phone call.” said Carl.

“Oh. I don’t have a computer.” said Homer despite having one in Das Bus.

“And that’s why you’re trying to go to work and we’re going on vacation! See ya!” said Lenny. They drove off.

Homer groaned.

“That’s it! I’m getting a computer! Because Bill Gates broke my old one smart ass narrator!” said Homer. “As soon as I get out of here. He shook the bars before realising he was already outside.

Oh I am so stupid!” he said laughing at his silliness

...

Meanwhile Lisa was playing with her dolls.

”Let’s go shopping!” said Malibu Stacy.

”Oh Stacy! Only a chauvinistic man would make you say something silly like that!” Lisa sighed.

”My Spider sense is tingling!” said another girl doll.

“Uh... Okay...!” said Lisa.

She went downstairs.

”Mom something is wrong with what my doll is saying...” Lisa whined.

”Not now dear! Oh shoo! Shoo you bad Mole People!” Marge was hitting reptilian mole people that had dug up into the kitchen from underground. The Mole People growled as she hit them with a broom.

”Uh okay...” Lisa groaned.

”Lisa we do not have time for a You episode today! We’re following Homer about!” said the director.

Lisa sighed exasperated.

”Even Gamblor has more lines than Lisa...” said Bart.

Gamblor was out in the yard laughing maniacally with his neon claws and Mecha body made of slot machines and roulette wheels and neon logos.

Homer arrived at a computer store. A man was helping find a good computer.

“How about that one.” Homer asked.

“Sir if you buy that, you’ll be just buying a very expensive paperweight.” said the shop assistant.

“Well a paperweight would be nice but what I really need is a computer.” said Homer. “How about that one?”

“Sir the technology is three years old. Only suckers buy that.” said the shop assistant. “You’re not a sucker are you?”

“Heavens no!” Homer gasped.

“Good because if you were I’d have to ask you to leave the store.” said the man.

“I just need a computer to send and receive emails...” said Homer.

“Oh... well this one will do fine.” said the shopkeeper picking out an average computer. “Damn! I wanted to sell him the really expensive Astronaut computer!”

“I was an astronaut once!” said Homer.

“Sure you were.” said the shopkeeper packing his new computer in a box.

Homer looked at the price tag of the astronaut computer. It was five thousand dollars. He then took a sip of his glass of water and looked at it again and spat out his drink. “Five thousand dollars?!”

“Yes. Isn’t she a beauty? But you don’t need something so advanced Mr I only want to send and receive emails. Now let’s go...” he took Homer and his new computer to the till.

...

Homer got home and Lisawas mowing the lawn with the rusty old manual lawnmower and grumbling and whining like Bart in Call of the Simpsons.

“Lisa look! I got a new computer!” said Homer parking up on the curb and showing off his computer.

“That’s nice Dad, but could you have invested in a new lawnmower? Like those rideable ones Mr Flanders has?”

Rod rides past the fence between their front lawns on a rideable lawnmower.

“No.” said Homer. “And where is your brother? I told him to do the lawn!”

Bart was inside watching cartoons.

Homer went inside and set up his computer.

“Okay computer. Kill Flanders.” said Homer.

“Soundwave acknowledges.” said the computer in a computerised tone as it transformed into a killer robot and smashed through the kitchen wall and went to Flanders who was trimming his bushes.

“Well hi diddly- Gaaaaaagh!” The robot computer strangled him.

“Coooool!” said Homer.

He had put an older computer in the bin.

“Homer don’t throw my computer away.” Marge nagged. “And why is there a robot outside strangling Ned?”

“Dad we’ll get the computer set up for you.” said Lisa. Why don’t you go outside and call off your killer robot computer that’s strangling Mr Flanders.

“No because I told it to do that...” said Homer.

Sometime later.

“There Dad. I set up your computer and wrote some instructions on basic commands that anyone can understand.” said Lisa.

“I see.” said Homer.

The new computer was in the bin outside.

“Homer bring that thing back in the house now!” said Marge.

“Fine...” Homer sighed.

...

Uncle Herbert came over to visit with good news. He got out of bankruptcy for the umpteenth time.

"Herb you really need to stop getting bankrupt every so often. It's becoming a reoccurring joke..." Homer sighed.

"Hey that first time was still your fault. Man if I hadn't let you design your own car I'd still be a billionaire instead of living on trash!" Herb ranted.

"Like a trash man?" Oscar asked trying to lead the conversation into a Frank Reynolds reference.

"Oscar no!" Bart whined.

"I'd say more like Oscar the grouch." said Herb. "Say why are you whining at Grouchy Bart?"

"Don't ask... he thinks you sound like Danny Devito and hasn't stopped making references ever since we first met you Unky Herb." Bart replied.

"Oh..." said Herb.

"Hey! Just because my name's Oscar doesn't mean I'm the grouch off Sesame Street." said Oscar annoyed.

Outside Oscar the Grouch popped out off their bins. "Give us the money!"

"Elmo knows where you live!" Elmo popped out of the bin next to his.

"That's never gonna not be scary." Bart commented.

The Simpsons then went into the dining room.

"The drinking bird!" Herb lamented as he picked up the broken drinking bird.

"Uh yeah... sorry about that Herb. Bill Gates sort of broke it buying out my Hyperglobalmeganet business..." Homer explained.

"Homer, these might not be worth much but this has sentimental value! I gave it to you as a gift because you liked it! (Growls) I'm so mad I could just strangle you right now!" Herb ranted.

"Okay. If that'll make you feel any better!" Homer whimpered.

"Nah, I'll just buy you a new one." said Herbert.

...

Sometime later, Internet King Homer was on the family computer browsing the web. He went on Chief Wiggum's page and accidentally got virtual Wiggum to call a squad car to his address by selecting "No" when asked if he had committed a crime.

"You have selected No which means you have committed a crime but don't want anyone to know. A squad car has been sent to your location Homer Simpson!" said Virtual Wiggum.

"D'oh!" Homer groaned.

"Hey Homeboy, whatcha doing?" Bart asked as he sat next to Homer and Oscar sat on Homer's opposite side.

"You call me Dad! And it's none of your business!" said Homer.

"Coooool! You're on the internet! Look there's this really cool website!" said Oscar typing something.

Homer and Bart screamed as Oscar had gone on a pornographic website.

"Turn it off! Turn it off!" Bart yelled.

"Listen here spiky! You don't ever, ever go on those websites in this house! Understood?!' Homer told Oscar off while grabbing his arm.

"Yes sir." Oscar gulped.

"Now buzz off you two and go out and play or something." said Homer.

The two boys left for Bart's room.

Homer then started looking at animated gifs. "Oooooooh! A dancing Jesus!" Homer had found a dancing Jesus animation. Jesus was dancing in a spotlight. Homer made "Dee dee dee de dee!" sounds to the music while wagging his fingers as if enjoying the funny little animation. "That's a cool little animation! I think I'll add that to my webpage..."

...

Homer gathers everyone, including Herb and Hugo, to look at his new webpage.

"Feast your eyes on my new webpage!" said Homer. He clicked the mouse and red curtains opened to a jingle to Show Homer's very noisy webpage! There was a dancing Jesus in the middle, bells and alarm clocks ringing. Wriggling worms, flying angelic toasters and cartoon mouths saying "Hello! Hello! Hello!" over and over again. "Well? What do you think?" Homer asked.

"I got suspended from school today..." Bart explained waiting for everyone to yell at him.

"No kidding." said Homer joyfully as if he hadn't listened. "You'd think all those noises would get annoying but they're not." said Homer. Oscar was covering his ears irritated by the loud noises and ringing. "So... What do ya think? Be honest, it's great right?"

"They found a switchblade in my locker..." Bart said ashamed. However no one was listening.

"Well, a website is supposed to be personal. You've just taken copyrighted material! They could sue you!" said Lisa.

"Oh don't be ridiculous Lisa! Animated Gifs from Geociies are like clip art, they're there for everyone to use..." said Oscar. "Mind you no one wants to visit a webpage that just spams things at you. That website might crash a few browsers Homer..."

"I took a swing at a cop." Bart said, but nobody was paying attention. (Um this episode's canon equivalent is very weird...)

"They can't sue me if they don't know who I am! I think I'll call myself Mr X..." said Homer.

Leon S Kennedy from Resident Evil screamed and ran away.

"Homer no one can sue you for using the dancing Jesus or the flying toaster things. They're open source for everyone to use..." said Oscar.

"Woohoo!" Homer cheered.

"I'm just mad all the time..." said Bart.

Homer was typing something. Probably adding more annoying things to his website. "Yep this'll annoy a few people! Hehehe!

"Hrrrrrrmmm!" Marge sighed.

...

Everyone left to their own activities. Marge wanted a word with Homer. "Homer... Did you actually listen to anything Bart was trying to tell you?"

"Marge we don't have time for another Bart's in big trouble and we're supposed to be mad at him story." said Homer. "Besides whenever I'm mad at him Oscar keeps saying I'm a bullying jerk so I've started taking these mood pills and ignoring Bart. If you wanna yell at him go ahead." said Homer taking mood medicine to calm himself.

Marge hrmmmed.

Plot 2[]

Meanwhile up in Bart and Hugo's room.

"I can't believe Mom and Dad didn't even care that I got in trouble! I don't know whether to be mad or relieved!" said Bart.

"I'd say relieved. Count your lucky stars you got away with it." said Oscar. "So what are you gonna do now you've got the week off?"

"I was thinking of opening up my casino again." said Bart.

The following afternoon Bart had opened his casino treehouse and invited all of his friends.

"So what's on for tonight Bart?" Milhouse asked as they got ready.

"Well you already did a magic show last time and that failed spectacularly when my cat attacked you. We already had Robert Goulet as a guest..." said Bart.

"Oh I know! Strip poker!" Oscar suggested.

"Oscar no!" Bart yelled. "I've got something new. I swiped these Playdude magazines from the trash! Mom must have found my Dad's stash again." said Bart holding Playdude magazines.

"Cooooool!" His friends cheered.

"Playdude is just a parody we use instead of playboy so Hugh Hefner doesn't sue us." Oscar explains to the fourth wall.

"So bring your evening gowns guys and bubble pipes." said Bart.

Everyone stared blankly.

"Just bring your dressing gowns..." said Bart.

...

That night they got partying. Milhouse brought root beer and they read Homer's playdude magazines.

Meanwhile Homer was up late on his computer checking his annoying webpage.

Lisa came into the lounge in her pyjamas.

"Mom says for you to come to bed." Lisa said wearily.

"In a moment sweetie. Why isn't my webpage getting any hits?!" Homer replied. "Come on!" He tapped the screen where the hits meter was. It said 0000.

"Dad in order to get visitors your website has to offer something! Not just annoying noises and animations..." Lisa explained.

"But I wouldn't know what to put on my webpage!" Homer replied.

"What do people need?" Lisa asked.

"Disco Jesus!" said Homer. He typed away and now Jesus had an Afro and was dancing under a disco ball.

"No Dad!" Lisa whined.

Elsewhere Marge was checking on Bart's late night party/sleepover.

"Boys it's getting late, time to-Oh my lord! Bart where did you get those playdudes?!" Marge yelled.

"Um, the garbage..." said Bart blushing.

Marge confiscated them.

"Hmmmm! I thought I threw these away properly so your father wouldn't find them... Bart these aren't for children! Do you understand?" Marge explained.

"Yes Mom..." said Bart.

"Good now everyone inside. It's way past your bedtimes!" said Marge.

All the boys whined and went down the ladder and then went inside.

In bed.

"Homer, Bart got ahold of these from the trash." Marge showed his collection of playdude magazines.

"D'oh! Randy little!" Homer groaned. "What were they doing in the trash?!"

"Hmmmmm! Homer we're married. You should only have eyes for me!" said Marge.

"Oh I'm not interested in the ladies in them! I read the errrr, articles..." said Homer.

"Oh. So if I cut out the naughty pictures you'd be alright with that?" Marge replied.

"Yeah." said Homer.

"Oh okay. Goodnight dear." said Marge.

"Goodnight." said Homer.

...

The next day Marge gave Homer back his playdudes.

"Here you go Homer." said Marge.

Homer read one but was annoyed there were no naked ladies in it as they had been carefully cut out.

Homer threw them out. Somehow Bart got a hold of them again.

"Hey there's a recipe in here for something called a Tom Collins." said Bart. "I assume that's a cocktail but I only know of a Manhatten."

Then they found a game of spin the bottle. Which they played.

Well before they played they needed an empty bottle.

They poured beer out out of the treehouse window. It falls into Homer’s sleeping mouth because he snores. He swallowed the beer. “Mmmmmmm! Beer, such sweet, sweet beer... What!?”” He woke with a start.

"Milhouse I dare yooooouuu tooooo... kiss something with your eyes shut!" said Bart.

"Okay!" said Milhouse. He shut his eyes and pursed his lips ready for a kiss.

Homer came up the treehouse ladder to ask Bart something.

"Bart do you-" unfortunately he locked lips with Milhouse! "Eeeeeeew! I kissed Milhouse!" Homer was promptly sick and vomited everywhere. Once he was done he saw Bart had his playdudes again. "Bart! Do you even know what's in those!!" Homer confiscated them from him.

"No because someone decided to cut pages out of them!" said Bart.

"Oh, well these can't harm you, and I don't want them now, so enjoy..." said Homer giving the magazines back.

"I can't believe you kissed my dad..." Bart said to Milhouse.

...

Lisa was in her room playing with her Malibu Stacy doll. She pulled the string to make her talk.

"Let's all go shopping!" said the doll.

Lisa gasped. She pulled the doll's string again.

"Tell me I'm pretty!" said the doll.

"Oh no! Malibu Stacy you must have something sensible to say!" Lisa whined. she tried again.

"Don't ask me, I'm just a girl! Hehehe!" said the doll,

Lisa was horrified.

She was discussing the doll with Bart, who didn't care.

"So? It's just a dumb doll." said Bart.

"No it's sending out a chauvinist message that it's alright for girls to be dumb blondes from Sex and the City obsessed with looks and shopping!" Lisa ranted shaking the doll in Bart's face.

"And..." Bart asked.

Lisa growled and stormed off.

"Lisa no one wants to watch an episode about your dollies!" said Homer.

"Yeah that's like asking for an episode of the Rugrats that's just about Angelica and her Cynthia doll..." said Oscar.

"Hey! What's wrong with Cynthia?!" said Angelica.

Everyone gave each other awkward looks.

...

Homer was going through his emails.

He got one from Comicbook guy.

"Dear internet king.

Your website is extremely annoying and a cacaphony! Plus it crashed my PC!

Yours angrily

Comic book guy.

Ps Worst webpage ever!"

Homer whined.

Elsewhere in the backyard. Lisa was explaining to her friends about the things her doll was saying.

"Don't you see what's wrong with what she's saying?! She's brainwashing us into miniature Paris Hiltons!" Lisa ranted.

"Oh I know something's wrong with what my Malibu Stacy is saying!" said a buck toothed girl. She pulled her doll's string.

"My spidey sense is tingling!" said the doll in a man's voice.

Lisa was confused. "Uh....."

Homer yelled out the rumpus room window.

"Lisa! No one has time for your doll story!" Homer yelled.

Lisa stormed off to get away from Homer.

...

She was then in her room at her computer trying to decide a name for a doll.

"How about Pukelina?" Oscar asked.

Bart chuckled.

"Uh no." said Lisa.

"Pigface, the ugliest girl?" Oscar asked.

Bart laughed hysterically.

"Oscar!" Lisa yelled. "No, I was thinking of naming the doll after myself." said Lisa.

"That's a great idea!" said Bart. "I've got it! Loudmouth Lisa! No wait! Stupid Lisa Garbage face!" said Bart.

"Ugh... Forget it..." Lisa sighed.

"Ha! Stupid Lisa Garbage face!" Oscar giggled.

Bart went on his laptop to check his prank website he made about Lisa to taunt her. It was called StupidLisaGarbageface dot com. And had a picture of her caricature she got from the school fayre of her with a big head chasing tiny boys with a lovesick look on her face and crazy eyes. Bart had also uploaded pages from her diary onto it.

Oscar saw it and collapsed with hysterical laughter.

"Uh oh. Okay Oscar it's not that funny... snap out of it!" Bart tried to get him out of his laughing fit.

...

Homer was at his computer making his website even more annoying by putting Internet King pop ups on there. Then one of the annoying doodads he installed into the code of his website had a virus...

“Aaaaaagh! A computer virus!” Homer screamed.

“Oh no a compute virus! That could corrupt all our computers Dad! We better call out a debugger.” said Lisa.

“Nahahahaha! Debugger!” Bart said laughing.

“Quiet boy...” said a Homer.

“We could... or... we can go in the computer with my newest invention the virtual-helmet 3000.” said Hugo. “And pulverise that computer virus!”

“The thing’s idea sounds cooler we’ll do that.” said Homer.

“My name is Hugo!” Hugo yelled.

They put on helmets and went into the computer. They turned 3D or into CGI animation.

“Cooooool!” said Bart.

“This all looks rather expensive...” said Lisa admiring her 3D self slightly.

“Well Treehouse of Horror VI’s Homer3 did make an enormous hole in Fox’s budget...” said Oscar.

Then they saw Phig from Cyberworld fighting cartoon bugs. CGI Oscar willed a scouter lens on his eye that told him they were computer viruses.

“They’re computer viruses! Luckily our CGI forms are the most powerful forms yet,” CGI Oscar explained. He willed a suit of battle gear onto himself and a huge ass blaster onto his arm. The Simpsons did the same and blasted the cartoon computer viruses to pieces

Phig thanked them for their help.

“No offence lady, but if I want to speak to CGI babe fighting computer viruses I’d hang out with Bob, Enzo and Dot from Reboot...” said Oscar.

And that precisely happened because Phig took them to the cyber world museum which was in a virtual city.

A cone rammed Homer up the butt as they walked into the museum.

“Hey watch it coney!” Homer yelled and threw the cone it pierced the ground causing a catastrophic rip in the fabric of the virtual dimension again.

“Oh real smart Homer...” Oscar sighed.

Plot 3[]

Luckily Bob from Reboot sealed the tear before it could get any worse.

“Coooool! Reboot!” said Oscar. “This show existed!”

“Yes we know Oz... it was sponsored by Skips prawn flavoured snacks...”

Then Megabyte attacked. Because CGI Tony Jay!

“Oh so it is... my old friend Bob...” said Megabyte mockingly.

“What are you up to now Megabyte?” Bob asked annoyed.

“Uh maybe we should get outta here and look around the museum...” said Phig.

“No way lady! Museums are boring! I wanna see some action! And maybe kick Megabyte’s butt!” said Bart.

“Such bravado for a sprite...” said Megabyte as he unsheathed his Wolverine claws. Yes he has knuckle claws like Wolverine.

“Eep!” Bart gulped deciding he’d rather hide in the museum with his family.

The Simpsons, Oscar and Phig went to a museum of CGI films and animation. They passed a moving painting of AntZ, Toy Story, Shrek etc.

“I liked those cartoon alien bugs. I want an army of them to work for me.” said Uncle Herb. “And the Looney Tunes.”

“No Unky Herb...” Bart sighed.

“Pregnant Arnold Schwarzenegger!” Oscar yelled.

“No Oz!” Bart whined.

“Sssshhh! This is a museum!” Phig explained asking them to be quiet in the museum.

However just as the felt safe from the fight between Bob and Megabyte. Hexadecimal giggled as she vandalised the paintings by painting over them. She could even turn people into paintings.

“Oh no, it’s Megabyte’s sister Hexadecimal...” said Enzo.

“Hey! I am more than just Megabutt’s sister! I am Hexadecimal!” said Hexadecimal changing her faces about to suit her expression. She had multiple faces like theatre masks that she would wear to suit her mood. Right now she was annoyed to be only known as Megabyte’s sister.

“Yes we know you have quite the reputation of your own as being a dangerous computer virus...” said Enzo.

“I read the entire wiki. Megabyte and Hexadecimal are not just brother and Sister. They were originally part of an even more dangerous computer virus called Gigabyte...” said Oscar.

Enzo and Dot were unnerved.

“Bob always spoke about the times of Gigabyte... about how he was so dangerous he couldn’t be stopped except by separating him into Megabyte and Hexadecimal.” said Enzo.

“Hellooooo! I’m trying to be evil over here!” said Hexadecimal annoyed at being ignored.

“Hex can you be quiet for just one minute?” Enzo groaned.

“Certainly not! I’m the baddie here!” said Hexadecimal.

“What are you gonna do that’s you’re personal thing? Besides being infected by those creepy black spiders...” said Oscar.

“Web creatures, Oz.” said Enzo.

“Or get covered in those colourful worms...”

“Nulls, Oz...” said Enzo.

“Why you insolent little!” Hexadecimal was angry so she had her angry face with red eyes and fangs on.

“Eep!” Oscar gulped.

Suddenly a big purple cube covered the quadrant of the city the museum and Megabyte and Bob were in.

“What is that?” Bart asked.

“A game cube. We’re about to enter a game...” said Dot.

“Coooool!” said Bart.

“Nintendo should sue.” said Oscar.

...

The game was Super Mario with a raccoon computer virus. Dot and Enzo played the game to get everyone out. Everyone else just lounged about.

Bart was reminiscing from this episode’s prequel where everyone got stuck on a tropical island.

“And the Oscar tried to kill Martin by pushing him off a cliff so he could make a Lord of the Flies reference.

“Piggy...” Oscar chuckled sadly.

“I would have been Piggy if we hadn’t got everyone to see sense when they thought Milhouse ate all the food and wanted to kill him!” said Lisa.

”Enzo,” Hugo asked.

”Hmm?” Enzo replied.

”What is with the freaky scary skeletons in some of the Game Cube simulations?” Hugo asked.

A cartoon raccoon computer virus was killed by green glowing skeletons.

Shigeru Miyamoto was suing Reboot because of his new console the GameCube.

”Ah the GameCube....” Oscar sighed.

”Um... I don’t know... my writers really like skeletons?” Enzo replied.

Then they had to go to the virtual park to fight Megabyte.

Then they encountered future Enzo, now calling himself Matrix and using a gun!

”Cooool!” Oscar cooed.

Bart frowned.

Then there was a Bart from the future. Season 18's Bart and Frink’s Almost Excellent Adventures IV he summoned a copy of himself that mutated into a hideous monster version of himself. Like Bart’s guilt but yellow with spotted skin, razor sharp teeth and claws.

”That’s you when you made a pet computer virus.” Oscar explained to Bart.

”Go get em boy!” said Future Bart to his pet computer virus.

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