Simpsons Fanon
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Lisa on Ice Bart and Lisa become rivals when they join rival ice hockey teams.

Plot[]

The Simpsons are watching the evening news. The weather man announces there will be a blizzard over night.

"Woohoo!" said Bart. He threw his homework into the fire.

"Bart, that weather prediction is never accurate! It's the middle of summer!" Lisa explained.

The next morning Lisa decided to prank Bart.

"Snowball fight!" Lisa yelled and threw a snowball in Bart's face. Bart furiously leapt out of bed and chased after her.

He arrived outside to find it was sunny and there was no snow. "Unseasonable warmth?" Bart asked.

"It was ice from the fridge!" Lisa taunted and laughed.

"Where did you get you jammies from Simpson?! Did your mommy buy them for ya?!" Jimbo laughed. Bart was wearing extremely cute baby pyjamas! (Footed pyjamas.)

Bart looked down at his pyjamas. "Of course. Who else would?"

"You win this round Simpson!" Jimbo annoyed he was no longer embarrassing Bart.

However Oscar saw Bart in his oh so cute pyjamas...

"Ohmygosh! Ohmygosh! Where did you get such cute pyjamas! Eeeeee!" Oscar grabbed Bart and hugged him.

"Oscar! Personal space!" Bart yelled.

"Bart get inside and get dressed it's time for school!" said Marge.

Lisa was looking smug.

"Oh hell no! You're not winning this round sistah!" said Oscar in a sassy tone. He used his magic wand and suddenly it started snowing!

"Oscar!" Lisa yelled. "That can't be good for the environment!"

...

Eventually the snow was so deep that the school was shut on the radio.

"Woohoo!" said Bart still in his cute pyjamas.

...

After Bart's very abnormal snow day everyone was back at school. Lessons were cancelled for an assembly.

Skinner announced because of missed deadlines. (The snow day) and impossibly low test scores, pink warning slips were to be handed out when ever anyone was in danger of failing in a subject.

Martin was being nerdy as usual.

"Hey Kerne make a note on your electric diary to beat up Martin!" said Jimbo.

Kerne wrote Beat up Martin. It turned into "Eat up Martha."

Martha, a punk fifth grader with long black hair and face piercings looked at Kerne romantically.

"Martha and Kerne, sitting in a tree! K I s s I n g!" Dolph and Jimbo sang. Kerne angrily threw his electric diary at Martin. He yelped as it whacked him on the head.

Ralph was called up first.

"Yaaaaaay!" said Ralph.

"No Ralph. This says you're failing English. That's bad." Skinner explained.

"Me fail English? That's umpossible!" said Ralph. He just stood there.

"Ralph, get off the stage sweetie!" said Chief Wiggum.

"Next up is Simpson! Bart!" said Skinner. Bart gulped and went up.

"I wouldn't be so surprised Bart. You're failing in several subjects!" However Skinner had some good news. "On the other hand your excelling at your magical subjects!"

"Skinner... I have a reputation to uphold..." Bart blushed.

"Next up is Simpson, Lisa?!" Skinner was shocked.

Everyone gasped and stared at Lisa. She was horrified to receive a pink slip.

"There must be some mistake Principal Skinner!" Lisa stuttered.

"I thought so too young lady! But here it is! You're failing at Gym!" said Skinner.

"Gym? That's an outrage!" Lisa yelled. She screwed up the slip and threw it.

...

At home Marge and Homer are cross with Lisa.

"Hmmmm! Lisa we're very disappointed in you!" said Marge as she read Lisa's pink warning slip.

"Why aren't you mad at Bart?! He's got more than me!" Lisa protested.

"Yeah but we've grown to expect bad report cards! And he's got less than we expected he would get! Well done boy for not flunking all your subjects!" said Homer as he scruffled Bart's hair. "As a reward for not failing Potions, Charms, Transfiguration and Defensive against the dark arts... here's your new turtle as promised." Homer gave Bart a pet turtle.

Lisa screamed and ran off upstairs.

"Hmmmmm! I think we're done something wrong here..." Marge pondered.

"You think?!" Oscar remarked.

Later Marge apologised to Lisa.

"Mom if I don't pass Gym I'll have an F that'll haunt me forever!" Lisa explained.

Lisa had a daydream. She was at her student graduation. However a man in a stupid hat interrupted it to explain she had failed 2nd grade Gym.

"In that case Lisa Simpson. I sentence you to an eternity on Monster Island!" said the college Dean as she was handcuffed. "Don't worry it's just a name.

Later Lisa and some other college students were being chased about an island by Godzilla, Mothra, Rodan and a fire breathing Gamera! XD

"He said it was just a name!" Lisa yelled exhausted.

"What he meant was Monster Island is actually a peninsula!" said a student.

Lisa's dream ended with her wondering why she dreamt about Godzilla of all things.

...

Bart was thinking of a name for his turtle.

”Michelangelo!” Oscar yelled.

”No! Absolutely no way!” said Bart.

”I like it!” said Hugo having got out of the attic and hid with his head under the kitchen tablecloth like Barney.

Bart winced, baffled by this.

...

Lisa decided to take up extra curricular sports lessons at school to bump up her grades. However...

In basketball she accidentally dribbled the ball with her chin. “Doh! Doh! Doh! Doh!” she groaned.

In volleyball the ball bursted on her head because her starfish hair punctured it.

"Girls that was our only ball..." said the gym teacher. Everyone was dismissed from class.

At dodgeball everyone threw their dodgeballs at Lisa very hard.

However one evening Bart had joined an ice hockey team. He was on Chief Wiggum's team, The Pigs.

Suddenly he saw a familiar mask.

"Nyaaaaaaaagh! Jason Voorhees!" Bart screamed.

However the figure laughed Milhouse's nasally laugh. "Ha! You so fell for that!" Milhouse taunted. "It's just my hockey mask!"

"I so knew it was you Milhouse!" Bart retorted. "Anyway, why are you on Apu's team?"

"The half price Squishees were too tempting!" said Milhouse.

"Oh damn those tempting Squishees!" Bart groaned.

...

After the game Bart's team won and badly hurt Milhouse. However Wiggum had some bad news. He bet on the other team so he had to forfeit the pizza dinner reward to them.

Everyone on his team groaned in disappointment.

To take his frustration out on someone, Bart started shootings garbage and pucks at Lisa to torment her.

She screamed and dodged the projectiles. However a puck was going to hit her so she reflected it with a hockey stick.

...

Apu saw this and decide to make Lisa his new goal keeper. "Just to be sure this isn't a fluke. Hey little girl! Catch!" Apu fired a puck at her. She screamed and caught it.

...

"Hmmmmmm! Ice hockey? I don't know Lisa, that sport is so violent! Look at Milhouse's teeth!" Marge explained. She was holding some teeth that were knocked out at last night's game.

"Mom... stop showing us those...." Bart groaned.

Then Milhouse knocked. He was with his dentist. "Do you have my teeth?"

Everyone looked around awkwardly. "Um... no." Marge lied.

However Lisa was allowed to go ahead and join Apu's team. Homer went with her.

"Now listen up! I don't want anyone giving my daughter a hard time just because she's a girl!" Homer ordered.

"Dad please, I'll be fine." said Lisa.

"Bleh Bleh Bleh! No pranks! No jokes! And- (Homer screams with laughter) Look! That kid has bosoms! Someone get me a wet towel!" User was naked and looking at his bosoms.

Suddenly we hear a wet towel being cracked and Uter yelping as Homer chased him a cross the changing room. "Don't make me run! I'm full of chocolate!" yelled Uter.

...

Meanwhile outside the hockey arena Martha was trying to make out with Kerne. But he was too shy to say he wasn't interested in her.

"Uh babe.... Oh look! Bruce Dickinson from Iron Maiden!" yelled Kerne.

"Oh where?!" asked Martha but Kerne ran away.

Martha cried. "Why won't you love me?!"

At her first game Lisa was frightened every time the puck flew at her and screamed.

Marge was covering her eyes.

“Come on honey, don’t you want to see our little girl play?” said Homer.

“No. She must be so terrified! I should have never let her play!” said Marge.

Lisa screamed again.

Homer and Oscar laughed cruelly and obnoxiously.

However Lisa eventually proved to be a much better goalie than Milhouse. The game ended in a draw.

...

Bart that evening was furious. He was in Lisa's room pulling the heads off her dolls.

"Bart! Stop that!" Lisa yelled.

"It's a free country..." Bart replied.

"Get out of my room!" Lisa yelled.

"Fine, but I'll be doing this with my arms. (He starts windmilling his arms) and if any part of you should get hit it's your own fault!" said Bart.

"Very well. Then I'll be kicking air like this! Uh! And should any part of you occupy that air, it's your own fault!"

They both started making demented noises as Lisa kicked air and Bart moved about like a robot. Eventually we hear screaming from upstairs.

"Hmmmmm! I better see to that." Marge groaned. She saw Homer watching her pie. "Now Homer, don't you eat this pie!" Marge stupidly left the blueberry pie unattended.

"Pie, I will be doing this with my mouth! (Makes eating sounds as he bites air) And if any part of you gets eaten, it's your own fault!" said Homer. He started biting air and approaching the pie until he bashed his head on the cooker hood. "Ow! My head! Oh what the heck." He grabbed the pie and ate it.

...

Marge found the kids fighting in Lisa's room.

"Hey stop that! Stop that!" She started switching the lights on and off rapidly. Wheeeeeeee!

"Mom! Can you not do that! It's very annoying!" Bart groaned.

"I never want to see you ever fight like that again! You are not in direct competition! I repeat, not in direct competition!" Marge told them off.

"Okay Mom we get it." said Bart.

"Hey kids! I just got news! Both your teams are in the final! You'll both be in direct competition with each other!" said Homer excited. "USA! USA! USA!" He said repeatedly while flicking the lights on and off! Wheeeeee!

"Homer! Stop that!" Marge nagged.

“No! It’s coooool! Wheeeeeeeee! On! Off! On! Off! On! Off! On! Off!” Oscar played with the light switch.

Plot 2[]

”Hey Bart, since Lisa is getting good at sports, where does that leave you?” Milhouse asked Bart one morning at school,

”I’ll have to study and get good grades!” Bart gasped. Omg! He’s Hugey!!

Bart to music put up his hand in class at every question.

”Bart Simpson... Bart Simpson.... Bart Simpson.... Bart Simpson! You have put your hand up for every question and you haven’t got any right!!” said Mrs Krabappel frustrated with him after several questions.

”I’m sorry...” said Bart.

After class Jimbo’s gang beat him up.

”That’s for wasting teacher’s valuable time!” Jimbo grunted punching him repeatedly in the stomach.

”Hey leave him alone!” Lisa yelled and she beat the crap out of the bullies and pulled Jimbo’s shirt over his head.

”You’re just lucky Lisa’s your sister, dude...” said Jimbo.

...

It was the final.

"Hey Bart... I have a lucky charm!" Lisa was wearing a Krusty doll head as a necklace.

"Krusty!" Bart cried. "You clown murderer you!" They started fighting.

Apu and Wiggum broke up their scuffle. "Okay save it for the game!" said Apu.

"Hmmmm! This is bringing out the worst in them! Why can't they play nice..." Marge sighed.

The game started. Jimbo fouled Bart and slammed him into the safety screen.

"He fouled my boy! I demand justice!" Marge yelled.

"Mooooom!" Bart groaned with embarrassment.

"Jimbo has been penalised. Bart gets a free shot!" said the referee. Apu's substitutes booed.

...

"How comes you're not playing spiky?" Homer asked Oscar.

"Because I don't want to lose any of my teeth and I can't ice skate!" Oscar replied.

...

It then came down to a one on one final shoot out between Bart and Lisa.

However they started having flashbacks of themselves helping each other out as babies. Little Bart was doing shadow puppets for Lisa to make her laugh.

Baby Lisa nursed Bart's knee with a plaster when he fell off his skateboard. Bart gave Lisa some of his ice cream when she dropped hers. Baby Lisa gave Bart the first cookie from the cookie jar when they helping each other to nick cookies.

Then I faint from the cuteness overload!

In the present Bart and Lisa surrended and the game ended in a draw.

"A draw?! That sucks!" said one of the parents. Suddenly everyone started ripping up chairs and rioting! Cooool!

Bart and Lis agreed never to fight again and skated to the changing rooms.

...

Bart was in class one morning. However, he hadn’t done his homework... He was dreading being called.

“Luckily I’m a sssssssSimpson...” he said smugly.

“Okay we don’t have anyone with a name beginning with A....” Mrs Krabapple was reading the register. “I love this class! Bart is always first up! Mwuhahahaha!” She thought happily and wickedly that the first student alphabetically was Bart. She did everything by First names not surnames....

A boy coughed for attention...

“Oh nuts! I forgot we have a new student today... Ace Dracula...” Mrs Krabapple sighed. “Hand in your homework Ace...”

Suddenly Principal Skinner had an announcement over the tannoy. “Everyone to the assembly hall immediately for an emergency assembly!”

Everyone cheered and ran out.

“Single file children! Single file!” Mrs Krabapple yelled.

The assembly lasted all day so Edna never got to ask Bart for his homework.

”Damn it! Now he’s gonna pull a one nighter!” Skinner ranted.

Bart however instead of getting straight to cramming his homework last minute, decided to pull the heads off of Lisa’s dolls again.

”Bart! Stop that!” Lisa yelled.

”It’s a free country! I can do what I want!” said Bart petulantly.

”Get out of my room!” Lisa yelled.

”Okay but I pulled off the head from your favourite doll... Mr Honey Bunny!” said Bart decapitating Mr Honey Bunny!

“Bart, that’s your favourite childhood doll! Before you got into Krusty...” Lisa explained.

”Nooooooo! Mr Honey Bunny!” Bart cried and kissed his Mr Honey Bunny doll. Lisa laughed.

...

Oscar annoyed Homer by demanding he return to being Mr Thickly the wallaby from Taz in Tazmania, and singing the theme song constantly.

”Taz in Tazmania! Taz in Tazmania!” Oscar singing.

Bart cried and tried to find Marge’s sewing kit to sew Mr Homeybunny’s head back on.

”Hmmmmm! I think the attic monster took it to the attic...” said Marge.

”Marge!” Homer barked. “I’ll get the sewing kit boy... now no more talk about monsters in the attic!”

Bart gave mom a suspicious look.

Anyway School was having a lot of emergency assemblies.

The tannoy barked out instructions from Skinner during class.

”Children please head to the Butthead Memorial hall for yet another emergency assembly.” said Skinner over Tannoy.

Bart and his friends laugh hysterically.

”Ugh.... I really shouldn’t have let them name it...” Skinner sighed in his office.

”No Butthead! Nooooooooo!” Beavis cried.

Bart winced.

After assembly he sewed Mr Honey Bunny’s head back on. “Honey bunny...” he cooed and kissed the Mr Honey Bunny doll and put it in his desk.

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