Homer's Very Bad Day The sequel to Homer's bad day. Homer gets crushed by the garage door while the family are out, worrying Marge about his health that he should get some insurance in case something terrible happens. Then Homer buys the kids a trampoline but when Ralph falls off of it he tries to get rid of it. Then while posting his insurance, eating a hotdog, holding Maggie, walking the dog and wanting a newspaper from a vending machine Maggie gets trapped in the newspaper vending machine!
The couch gag is the Simpsons sitting down normally but Homer with an evil leer takes off his face revealing he is Sideshow Bob in disguise! The Sideshow Bob theme plays as he gets out a sharp knife.
"Nyaaaaaaaarrrgh! Sideshow Bob!" Bart screams and runs away with Bob in his Homer costume chasing Bart.
Marge is driving the kids somewhere one Sunday morning. For some reason. Whatever it is it's boring to them as they're bored.
"Isn't this a lovely Sunday drive?" Marge asked cheerful.
"Suuuure... why don't we top it off by helping out old people..." Bart asked sarcastically.
"Why that's a lovely idea Bart!" said Marge.
"Mom I was being sarcastic..." said Bart.
"Oh..." said Marge disappointed.
"Well with all the techno terror and global warming I think this Sunday drive reeks of bio hubris..." Lisa sighed.
"Lisa stop using fancy words!" Marge told her off.
"How did Dad get out of this?" Bart asked.
"He's cleaning out the garage." said Marge. "Oh look! Krusty! Krusty say something funny!"
Krusty was drinking coffee and wearing a fishing hat. "What is it with you vultures and asking me to tell jokes or do a monkey dance?! The fishing hat means leave me alone!!"
"What a nice man!" said Marge before driving away.
At home Homer was in the garage cleaning.
"There. Now the next task... kill spiders? There's no spiders here!" said Homer. A black widow like spider was on his arm. Homer screamed.
The spider broke its web bungee and scuttled about while Homer tried to stomp it.
"What's a matter spider? Afraid to die?!" Homer yelled. The spider hid under a cardboard box.
Homer lifted it up. "Ah ha! Uh?" However the spider had vanished somehow. However when he looked up at the box he saw there were hundreds of spiders clinging to the bottom. They dropped onto his face! Homer screamed and ran about the garage breaking tings and swearing.
He found a can of spider poison called "Charlotte's Dead" Hehehehe! He sprays himself with it and screams because it got in his eyes.
"Spider poison is people poison!?" Homer yelled. In his blind stumbles he tripped on Bart's skateboard and fell on his back. He looked up in horror as a spider dangled from the garage door. An extreme close up showed it was angrily glaring with its eight tiny black eyes. Suddenly it activated the garage door...
The family went home only to find Homer lying lifeless in the garage door way and being crushed by the door repeatedly.
Marge gasped horrified.
"Now open the envelope I gave you." Bart said to Lisa. She opened a brown envelope labled For Your Eyes Only. Inside was a kid's drawing of Homer being crushed by the garage door.
Marge set the door to open and it folded up. Homer was lying lifeless with a purple face.
"He's not breathing!" Lisa examined him.
"I'll help!" Bart did an elbow drop wrestling more on Homer's stomach. He suddenly coughed up loads of spiders and revived but was traumatised and screaming nonsense about spiders.
Later Homer was in bed being nursed back to health by Marge.
"Homer we had quite a scare today! This has made me worried! What if something bad were to happen to you?!" Marge explained.
"I'm fine. Nothing bad will-" Somehow Homer got his neck crushed by a window and was trapped. Marge gasped and freed him.
"Okay I'll get life insurance..." said Homer.
"You better Honey... You keep almost dying! Look at these vacation photos!"
Inside a photo album were pictures of Homer being hurt or humiliated.
At a trip to Disneyland, Homer is being beaten up by Mickey Mouse and Goofy. At a trip to Mount Rushmore Homer got stuck up giant stone Abraham Lincoln's nose while Bart in a safety harness laughed at him.
"That one was Bart's fault. He told me there was gold up Lincoln's nose..." said Homer.
The next picture was Homer trapped headfirst in a whale’s blowhole. Marge was nearby gasping in alarm. Bart was laughing again.
"If you die, I'll be a widow with three kids to look after!" Marge explained.
"Four kids Marge! Four!" Homer corrected her because she forgot Hugo.
"Oh yeah four..." said Marge
Homer and Marge went to a rather depressing insurance building.
The lady asked Homer about his health.
"Any heart attacks?"
"Don't we all?" Homer answered.
"No. No wait three! I uh don't remember much after the last one..." Homer groaned while blinking his eyes out of sequence.
"Do you smoke?" The lady asked.
"Yes!" said Homer.
"Homer you don't smoke." said Marge.
"I'm trying to look cool!" said Homer.
The lady shook her head and put Homer's insurance form in the shredder.
"It still counts if I sign it!" Homer tried to sign it but the shredder sliced his hand badly! "Yaaaaaaaagh! My haemophilia!" His wrist bleeds badly.
The lady stamped Uninsurable on his chest. Homer groaned.
At home Marge sighed as she sat down to watch TV. "Oh well... so my husband isn't insured... what's the worst that can happen?"
However the film she watched was about a rich couple playing tennis. Suddenly the husband has a heart attack and dies!
He never did his will properly so the lady got nothing and was rendered homeless.
The lady lost all her rich friends and went crazy.
"Clara eventually got into college." said the narrator. Marge sighed with relief. "As a cadaver!" Marge gasped in horror. (A cadaver is a corpse used to teach coroner students)
Marge was worried and had another talk with Homer.
"Don't worry Sweetheart, after that snooty hag wouldn't insure me I got us another insurance broker!"
Lionel Hutz arrived in the kitchen. "Lionel Hutz, Attorney and insurance broker." Lionel gave Marge his card.
"Yes we know who you are Mr Hutz. My husband always calls upon you for legal matters..." said Marge.
They were then at his office.
"And there. Mr Simpson, you are financially secure with life insurance should the worst happen. I can even get my sworn enemy the blue haired lawyer to confirm this."
"This insurance is kosher." said the blue haired lawyer confirming Homer's insurance was legit. "And screw you Lionel! At least I can win a case!"
Lionel Hutz groaned and buried his head in his arms
"Now Homer, just because you're insured now doesn't mean you can be complacent! I don't want to be a widow just yet..." said Marge.
"I'll be fine Marge..." said Homer.
However at dinner he got poisoned by some broccoli from Treehouse of Horror XI.
Marge and the kids had to revive him until he coughed up the deadly vegetable.
Then when Maggie was having another of her cruel moods she hid in the air duct and when Homer tried to get her out with some tongs she snatched the tongs and hit him with them. He did a Curly thing and later Marge found him lying down with something pinching his nose and twisting it with tongs. "Nyaaaa-ah! Ah! Aaaaaaagh!" Homer made Curly/Larry sounds.
Marge sighed. "Whatever..."
One morning Krusty was giving away a trampoline.
Homer read this in the newspaper.
”Oh my god! Tramampo tramamo trampampoline!” He tried to say trampoline. He ran off.
”Don’t bring home any more crutches!” said Marge.
”But Mommy I need crutches!” said the weird Tiny Tim kid from Fists of Odin.
Homer rang his doorbell but it was rigged to squirt water at people. Homer found this annoying at first but then just held the doorbell to get squirted.
"Hey! That seltzer is not free!" Krusty told him off.
"But the trampoline is." Homer asked.
"Uh yeah..." said Krusty. "No catches whatsoever!" There was a reason he was trying to get rid of it...
Homer took it from him. "The kids will love this!"
They did. Bart, Lisa, Maggie, Hugo and Oscar took turns on the trampoline bouncing upon it joyfully.
However Homer tried to and the trampoline shut on him like a Venus flytrap. Marge gasped.
"D'oh!" said Homer.
"Homer that doesn't look safe..." said Marge.
"It's fine... and it was free! I have big plans for this..." said Homer having a day dream.
In his dream he opened a theme park called Homer land with a shabby sign. There was a trampoline with kids jumping on it. A muddy swamp called Mucksville with kids playing it. Nelson threw mud at Wendell.
Then there was a fort made of old mattresses. Milhouse crawled out of it.
"It smells funny in there..." said Milhouse.
"No it doesn't!" said Homer.
The day dream ended.
Homer made good on his own zany ideas for a theme park. He put up a shabby sign painted with the words "Homer Land." It was barely moments before Oscar vandalised it with spray paint to read "Bonerland" Bart laughed upon reading it.
Then he made a big mucky mud pond for Mucksville. Mudboy was the first to try it as he laughed his insane laugh and jumped in.
Finally up went Fort Mattress. Oscar crawled inside.
"I found a dildo..." said Oscar from inside.
Marge went "Nyaaaaaa!" and crawled inside and snatched the sex toy from him.
Bart shivered in disgust.
Eventually all of Bart's friends at school, Rod and Todd and Otto came over to try out Homer's park. Mostly everyone tried the trampoline.
Peter Shepherd was trying Mucksville when it bubbled because Mudboy used is earth elemental powers to turn it into quicksand mud. Peter whined as he started sinking.
Oscar was nearby wearing only his trunks, waist deep in the mud and drinking a coconut cocktail drink in a coconut shell. The mud bubbled around him.
"That's disgusting! Leave Mudboy's mud pool now!" Mudboy told him off for farting in the mud.
However the trampoline soon went wrong as Otto fell off and dislocated his arm.
"Otto! Are you alright!" Bart asked.
"Yeah just help me put my arm back in. Oh! That hurt!" said Otto. Bart put his arm back in place.
Then Wendell took Otto's turn but projectile vomited over everyone as the bouncing made him sick.
"Eeeeeeeeew!" Everyone groaned.
Ralph bit his tongue while jumping. "Ow! I bit my tongue!"
Then Rod and Todd tested God as they jumped really high.
"We're nearly as high as God!" said Rod.
"I can see Mommy!" said Todd.
Lisa cried and sobbed into a tissue.
"Catch me! Catch me Lord!" said Rod. However the Flanders brothers crashed into each other mid air and landed in a heap.
"Ow! What did we do wrong God?" Rod asked.
"Uh didn't you two read the temptation of Jesus Christ when he spent 40 days and 40 nights in a vast desert with the devil tempting him? Especially the lesson "Don't tempt fate thinking God will catch you..." (Don't test God)."
"Yes... we learnt about it yesterday on Veggie Tales..." Rod replied sarcastically "now if you don't mind smarty pants I think I twisted my back!"
Marge was quite concerned by the amount of injuries. "Homer do something!"
"Okay..." Homer replied. He nailed in a sign reading "Caution!" However the scene pans out to reveal the entire lawn covered in crying/groaning kids lying about seriously injured. That one theme from Saving Private Ryan is playing.
Marge was nagging Homer about the trampoline.
"Okay I'll get rid of the stupid trampoline! Sheesh..." said Homer.
Homer drives the trampoline back to Krusty.
"Krusty I have your-"
"Just keep driving..." Krusty said pointing a shotgun at Homer. Homer drove off.
Homer took the trampoline to the desert canyon from the Roadrunner cartoon. He threw the the trampoline into the canyon but it bounced back up.
"And that's the last of Mr Trampoline..." said Homer. However a shadow covered him. He only realised as the the trampoline landed on him smashing him through the cliff edge. Homer was stuck there.
"If this was a cartoon the cliff would break off and fall now..." said Homer.
He remained all night. The wolves howled.
"I'm thirsty..." Homer groaned. The cliff eventually broke and he fell screaming into the canyon.
Then Roadrunner appeared. "Meep! Meep!" Then he ran away.
The trampoline was somehow in the backyard again.
Homer brandished a buzzsaw. "Okay trampoline you've met your match!" Homer turns on the trampoline and runs toward it screaming with anger.
In the kitchen Marge is feeding Maggie when Homer screams in agony and we hear something being cut and jamming the buzzsaw's teeth.
Homer is then seen covered in bandages ranting at the trampoline.
"Okay you may have won this round Trampoline but soon you'll rust! Rust I say! Gahahahaha! Ah! Hahahaha!" Homer ranted before laughing madly.
One morning Marge came down to another mess. She groaned as she found a pair of homer's white pants on the stairs.
She was most angry to find her family sitting in a filthy kitchen eating breakfast.
"Right that's it! Nobody leaves the house today until it's spotless! And to show I'm serious..." Marge was holding Oscar's ring of skeleton keys.
"My skeleton keys!" Oscar lamented. He tried to jump to get them but Marge held them out of his reach.
The family were assigned tasks.
"Bart you'll do the living room, Lisa, you'll vacuum your room, Errr... Homer after that near fatal boo boo I'm assigning the garage to Oscar." said Marge. Oscar went "D'oh!"
"Homer's done half the jobs. At least those skis from the Navahajo Olympics clogging up the attic are gone. You just need to kill the spiders Oscar."
"Piece of cake! I'm the master at Spider Stomp at the arcade!" said Oscar.
"Yes we know Oz..." said Bart. There was a flashback of Oscar playing Spider Stomp at the arcade while Bart watched bored.
"Homer instead you'll take out the garbage." said Marge.
"Dad you know the rules... whoever tops it off drops it off..." said Bart.
"Not just yet!" Homer grinned stomping the garbage into the bin so it took up less space. The trash at the top was from Love Day. Sir Lovesalot kept saying "I love you" as he got stomped on.
"Hmmmm! You can clear out the basement again... just remember to only use the Mr Cleanse in a well ventilated area! I don't want unexplainable screams again..."
Bart watched cartoons while half heartedly scrubbing and dusting until Marge switched off the TV.
"Hey!" Bart whined.
"No TV until you finish!" said Marge.
"But it helps me work!" Bart whined.
"Music helps me get in the mood Sweetie!" said Marge putting on some corny music.
Bart sighed and got to work.
Homer got a leaf blower and turned it on. It blew comics and magazines cluttering the basement floor everywhere and then into a little tornado.
"Jumanji!" Oscar yelled at the tornado and it vanished. "Wow it does work!"
"Oscar get to the garage and stop mucking about..." Marge sighed.
"Okay lady! I love you bye bye!" said Oscar mocking Bart as he returned from the kitchen. Bart sighed and shook his head.
"Finished!" said Homer.
"No you're not! I want you to get rid of the old Calendars and TV Guides!" said Marge.
"But Marge! I know it's not 1985 anymore but what if we get stuck in 1941 again?! said Homer.
Marge sighed at Homer's stupidity.
"And these TV guides! Homer upsets Sgt Carter... so many memories!" said Homer.
He imagines two characters from Sgt Carter.
"Pyle! Shazam! Pyle! Shazam! Pyle! Shazam!"
Homer giggles as his dream ends. "Shazam..."
In a puff of smoke DC Captain Marvel/Shazam appeared.
"You called?" Shazam asked.
"Um can you clean basements...?" Homer asked.
Lisa was in her room vacuuming when she heard what sounded like a Mariachi band outside. But it was Bill Clinton and some kids playing brass instruments to jazz music. Lisa sighed.
Moe drove past. "Hey Clinton! Get back to work!" He told off the president.
"Bite me!" said Bill Clinton.
Lisa sighed and muttered angrily at being stuck inside cleaning up. Suddenly the the vacuum cleaner sucked on her saxophone... (That sounds so dirty!) and the saxophone played a loud note. Lisa annoyed yanked the vacuum cleaner away from her saxophone.
Oscar was in the garage. He looked around at the spiders scuttling around and imagined a Spide Stomp arcade game machine.
He then grinned evilly and started stomping on the spiders. He sung "These boots are made from walking whilst doing so."
However a swarm of red back spiders covered him and he yelled before being webbed up in a cocoon. The spiders took the cocoon somewhere...
Homer got to cleaning the basement floor with Mr Clenser despite being told not to. He got hallucinations from the fumes again.
Marge heard blood curdling screams from the basement again. "Homer..."
Elsewhere Oscar woke up in a giant spider web with the spiders from his favourite arcade game Spider Stomp.
Oscar found he was stuck in spider web and couldn't move.
The crazy blue spider was holding a cartoon bomb and yodeling like Bette Midler as Winifred Sanderson.
"Coool! Wait! You're not mad at me for stomping on a few spiders are you?"
"Perhaps..." said the spider queen. The crazy blue spider yodelled again.
Bart was scrubbing the walls. Not taking notice out of boredom he rubbed off all the paint on a copy of the famous painting American Gothic.
Suddenly KBBL ring in and give me something stupid was on. Bart quickly grabbed the phone and yelled the winning phrase down it.
"Bart, I'm having palpitations!" Grampa had got on the line somehow. Um he was staying over?
"Grampa don't tangle up the line..." said Bart sighing.
Eventually everyone was finished. The house was delightfully clean.
"There now wasn't that better?" Marge asked.
The Simpsons minus Oscar murmured bored. Homer was traumatised by something. Probably his hallucinations.
"Good because next time we need a big clean up I'll know who to call!" said Marge.
The kids and Homer screamed and ran off.
Bart noticed someone was missing. Oscar...
"Hmmmm! I thought Oscar said he was good with getting rid of spiders I even bought a new can of Charlotte's Dead spray! Where's he got to?" Marge asked.
Oscar was in the spider web boring the spiders with his favourite cartoon spider web scenes.
"Now that baseball cap kid you captured wasn't young enough... the younger the better. Oh! I loooved the episode of Mighty Max where he is stuck in Arachnoid's web! He looks so cute in a cocoon! Oh! And Ben 10 when he gets stuck in a spider web with Zombozo as a giant clown spider! Or is it a spider clown? I love clowns!!"
The spiders face palm...
Next Bart was in hot water...
"Bartholomew J Simpson!!" Marge used his full name...
"Uh oh! Full name!" Bart gulped and went find what Marge was cross about.
"Look what you've done to my painting of American Gothic!" Marge yelled. The white canvas read "If you can read this then you've scrubbed too hard." with black letters.
"Hey I don't look after art work very well! Remember when I ruined your picture of Whistler's Mother?" Bart replied.
There was a cutaway of Bart sneezing on a copy of Whistler's Mother hanging up on a wall. He gasped as he got snot on it. He tried to clean it off with a handkerchief but forgot he used it to soak up ink from a leaky pen and smeared ink over the face of the old hag in the painting. He screamed and came back with a tin of industrial cleaner and wiped the painting clean. But it dissolved the paint making it bubble. Bart screamed and wiped the face of the hag smearing it to just off white and bits of green grey. He screamed louder and pondered how to fix this. He decided with a ballpoint pen to draw a cartoon face on the painting where the Mother's face should be.
"Yes dear I remember that..." said Marge as the cutaway ended.
Marge let Bart off deciding that perhaps she assigned them the wrong tasks as only Lisa cleaned without causing a mishap.
"I just hope your father delivers his insurance papers..." said Marge as he had some paperwork for his life insurance to post.
However Homer was trying to do too many tasks at once such as walk Santa's Little Helper, look after Maggie and post his paper work and eat a hotdog he bought for lunch. However he saw a newspaper with a funny headline and laughed. He wanted it but it was in a vending machine. Homer groaned and juggled Maggie, his paper work, his hotdog and Santa's Little Helper's leash to buy a newspaper. He checked he wasn't missing anything but screamed. Maggie was trapped in the newspaper vending machine.
"Ah! Don't worry sweetie I'll get you out!" He tried to pull her out by her pyjamas but ripped them off. Maggie was still in the vending machine in just her diaper. She giggled and wrapped herself up in a newspaper and went to sleep.
Homer screamed and tried to use some mustard to get Santa's Little Helper to send an urgent message home but he licked the mustard message.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
Eventually he eventually got Maggie home but she was still stuck in the vending machine. It was put in her crib.
Marge sighed disappointed in Homer.
Marge was having her book club.
“I’m not sure it’s even safe with these plastic cheese swords and knives now that we’re currently uninsured until that insurance I posted goes through...” Marge sighed.
Homer then had a very weird dream. A terrible accident caused Bernice to be set on fire. Luanne to be stabbed with a cheese knife, high heeled shoes in Kookie Kwan’s eyes and Agnes Skinner got an axe in her back.
“I’ve been cleaved!” She groaned and dropped down dead.
“Oh my god! We’re totally liable!” Marge ran about horrified. Then she saw Lindsey Naegle and they snogged passionately.
“Mmmmmmmm! Forbidden love...” said Homer groaning aroused.
Marge did not want to know what Homer was dreaming about.
Marge and her lady friends were discussing books.
“And if I was Peter Griffin I’d probably snap my neck now.” said Homer.