Simpsons Fanon
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Homer's Enemy Homer gets on the wrong side of of Frank Grimes and drives him to insanity with his poor work ethic, laziness and carelessness. Meanwhile Bart buys an old factory at an auction while forced to go out with his mom while she buys a novelty number plate.

Plot[]

The couch gag is the Simpsons sitting on the couch but Bart is glowing green. Homer gets up ad adjusts the TV, But is now glowing red. Homer slaps the back of his head and he returns to normal.

The episode starts with Kent Brockman reading the news. He has just finished reading a story. “(Chuckling) Which if true, means death for us all!” said Kent.

Oscar overreacted. “We’re all gonna die!” He screamed.

“Shut up! We’re not all gonna die! Now sit down!” Homer told him off for being too loud. He grabbed Oscar by the collar of his turtleneck sweater and forcefully sat him down.

“And now for another of Kent’s people.” said Kent.

The story was about Frank Grimes.

“Abandoned at the age of four by his parents... caught in a silo explosion at the age of fifteen... spent two years recovering in hospital.”

“Didn’t that guy replace you at work Dad?” Bart asked.

“Yeah, now I’m in Sector 6B with Smitty...” Homer sighed.

Homer was shown at work dealing with the aftermath of Smitty having part of his tongue amputated because of a tumour. He flicked spit everywhere when he tried to talk. Homer winced disgusted.

There is a brief summary of the events from You Only Move Twice onwards. Globex is eventually shutdown by government agents (successfully this time despite Homer's misguided attempts to help Hank) and Hank Scorpio is arrested. The Simpsons have to move back to Springfield and return to where they left off.

”Frank Grimes never went to school. Instead he spent his childhood as a delivery boy, delivering toys to far more fortunate children.” said Kent.

Homer returns to his job at the nuclear power plant. However since a new worker, Frank Grimes had taken his place in his absence, he's reassigned elsewhere.

Homer is at his work staton spinning on his chair.

“Chair goes round! Chair goes round! Chair goe-Waaaaaoof!” Homer says as he spins round until the seat comes off its axle from being unscrewed by constantly spinning in one direction.

“Hey Homer, you busy?” Lenny asked him.

“Yes.” said Homer.

“We’re gonna say hi to the new guy. Wanna come?” Carl asked.

“I don’t know... I’m kinda dizzy.... I should probably go home from sickness... Uhhh....” Homer is queasy from spinning around on his chair.

He then ends up going with his friends to pester Frank. Frank sighe as he sees Homer, Lenny and Carl presses up against the glass of his booth. Then Teddy, Oscar’s teddy bear joins them by smooshing his big wet shiny black nose against the booth’s glass.

“What are you doing?!” Homer asks him accusingly like he shouldn’t be there.

Frank lets them in.

“Can I help you?” Frank asked them.

“You’re new here aren’t ya?” Lenny asked.

“Kinda. It’s my second week.” said Frank. “I’m Frank Grimes by the way.”

“I’m Lenny, he’s Carl, and he’s Homer.” Lenny introduces himself and his friends to Frank. “I’m Lenny.”

“Nice to meet you. Now I really have to-“ said Frank.

“Wow! You pencils with your name on them! Just like an executive! I’d kill for one of these!” Homer finds pencils with Frank Grimes printed on them.

“You can just ask the stationary company to make some up for you!” said Frank.

“Can I have this one?” Homer asks. Wanting to keep the pencil.

“Um no...” Frank takes the pencil.

“Can Lenny have it?” Homer asked.

“No...” said Frank taking it back.

Teddy was wiping his nose down the glass walls of Frank’s work station.

“Why is there an unauthorised life form smooshing its nose against my work station windows?” Frank asked.

”I have no idea.” said Homer.

”Well it must be removed from the plant immediately. Mr Burns will be mad.” said Frank Grimes.

However Homer annoys Frank by eating his special dietary lunch despite it being clearly labelled.

“Homer that was my special dietary lunch...” Frank said annoyed because Homer ate his lunch. He is either vegan or intolerant of some sort of food like gluten or dairy...

”Yeah a bully at my old remedial school kept eating my yogurt. So when I caught him I put him in hospital. He spent a month on a drip being tube fed....” said Oscar menacingly.

”Why is there a child in the cafeteria?” Frank asked.

”I’m the author. I am everywhere at once.” said Oscar.

Calling him Grimey.

”Homer my name is Frank Grimes. I took the time to remember your name, can you at least remember mine...” said Frank.

Then taking his pencils and stuffing them into his ears/up his nose and gnawing them.

Frank seethed and angrily took back his surviving pencils that Homer hadn’t gnawed or inserted into his orifices.

Homer then nearly drinks a flask of sulphuric acid, which when Frank stops him and burns a hole in the wall upon throwing the acid away in the process gets him in trouble with Mr Burns, Frank declares Homer his enemy.

Frank then goes to his station, formerly Homers, and thinks back to his unlucky past. How he had to fight for a diploma and was horribly injured in a silo explosion.

Homer's friends speak with him, but he's disgusted by how homer eats rudely like a pig.

"Pigs tend to chew. I'd say he's more like a duck." said Lenny.

"Well some sort of animal..." Frank replied. He then goes on to remark that he found Homer sleeping in a radiation suit once.

Homer's friends ask him not to give Homer such a hard time.

However while trying to make up with Homer he sees that Homer's station is blaring with sirens and red lights because of an incident involving the sector it's monitoring. (A fire or meltdown perhaps.)

Homer's response, much to Frank's horror, is to pour water over the console to break it so it will shut up. The console short circuits.

Frank gets extremely angry at him and declares them enemies.

"So we're not swapping lunches?" Homer whined.

Frank growled under his breath.

...

At Moe's he laments his situation.

“Oh, I can't believe it. I got an enemy. Me-The most beloved man in Springfield.” said Homer.

Oscar shook his head.

”I don’t like you. In fact Apu doesn’t like you very much...” said Oscar.

”He doesn’t?!” Homer gasped.

“I don’t like you!” said Dr Evazan from Star Wars.

Homer sobbed.

“Aw, it's a weird world, Homer. As hard as it is to believe, some people don't care for me neither.” said Moe.

”No, I won't accept that.“ said Homer. “I like you.”

”You do?! Well that’s rather sweet Homer. That makes me feel a bit better about myself.” said Moe.

”We all have enemies sometimes Homer. I’m enemies with Jane Fonda.” said Lenny.

Homer winced.

”Why....?”

”I dunno...” said Lenny.

Moe suggests he invite Frank over for dinner.

”And then Bam! A fork in the eye!”

Homer winced. “Can we just not do the fork in the eye...”

”No we can’t! The fork in the eye is the most important part!” said Moe sharply.

Homer rolled his eyes.

”Homer maybe you just got off on the wrong foot...” said Carl.

”I dunno. Eating his dietary lunch, gnawing his pencils... calling him nick names... That’ll annoy anyone...” said Oscar.

”Hey what have you got against Homer?” Carl asked.

”Me? I fell out with him over how he treats his other son, Hugo. He locked him in the attic...” said Oscar glaring at Homer.

...

Meanwhile Marge has to run some errands and wants a novelty number plate. Rather than leave Bart and Hugo alone she drags them along with her.

At a registering office to get her new number plate, Bart and Hugo are getting bored. Marge is trying to find a number plate named after herself but her preferred options are taken.

"Sorry ma'am, Marge is taken." said the man.

"Hmmmm... How about Margie?" asked Marge.

"Sorry."

"Margarine?"

"Nuh uh, taken."

"Hmmmmm.... How about Mitzey?" Marge asked.

"We have Ditzey." said the man.

Marge wasn't sure.

Bart and Hugo were fed up. "Moooom... can we look around?"

"Sure but don't get lost or cause trouble." said Marge.

"We won't..." Bart and Hugo replied in unison.

They went off and found an auction happening. The fast talking auctioneer was selling something but no one was interested. Bart decided to bet.

"A quarter!" said Bart.

The auctioneer accepted the bet of a quarter and asked for any other bids. There were none.

"Sold, to the young boy who just arrived!" said the auctioneer.

"Cooool! What did I get?" Bart asked.

"Twelve Madison Avenue." said the man giving him deeds and a key.

”Woooooow!” said Bart holding the key.

Somehow Bart was able to keep what he just won from Marge and got home that day. He then decided to take Milhouse and Hugo to wherever it was that was his prize.

It turns out he had just bought an old abandoned factory.

"Cooooool! This place is huge!" said Bart. He threw a rock. It landed on the other side of the huge factory and echoes filled the room because of how big it was.

"What shall we do first?" Bart asked.

"Naked basketball!" said Milhouse.

”Cooooool!” said Oscar.

"Absolutely no way!" Bart quickly stopped him.

"Turn it in to a science laboratory! Mwuhahahahaha!" suggested Hugo laughing evilly.

"Absolutely no way to that either..." Bart sighed.

"Well you suggest something Bart..." Milhouse retorted.

Bart's idea involved sitting in an office chair brandishing a fire extinguisher and setting it off so the recoil sent him flying across the factory and into a wall. "Weeeeeeeee! Oof!"

"Okay that was fun for a few seconds. What now?" Hugo asked.

They then found themselves on the wooden walkway overlooking the factory floor. It was wobbly and dangerously unstable. "Wacky shack!" They cheered shaking the unstable foundation about.

Then they dissolved old typewriters in industrial waste.

“Cooool!” said Bart as they dissolved.

“It’s Diiiiiiip!” Hugo screamed.

Bart rolled his eyes.

At work.

“Hiya, stretch. What's the good word?” said Homer.

Stretch from Casper the friendly ghost went “Wooooooooooo! Ooga booga!” at him.

”Aaaaaaaaaagh! I forgot you were a spooky ghost! Aaaaaagh!” Homer screamed and ran off.

”Hmmmm... nice guy. Unfortunately I love scaring people.” said Stretch.

Frank winced.

Back at the factory.

Then it was time to go home.

"Hold up. Someone needs to stay behind to stand guard over the place tonight so nobody comes in!" said Bart.

Milhouse got the short straw and was appointed security guard.

"But what if I get thirsty?" Milhouse asked.

"Here's a quarter for the coffee machine. See ya tomorrow Milhouse." said Bart giving him some money.

Milhouse dressed as a security guard bought some coffee from the coffee machine. However it was so old a rat dropped out into his cup and scurried away. Then some coffee poured out. Milhouse sighed and took a sip of his rat flavoured coffee. "Well this is your life now Milhouse..." said Milhouse.

Plot 2[]

At home. Homer laments to his family that the new guy at work doesn't like him very much.

Marge suggests that he try to impress the new guy by making an effort. And perhaps invite him over for dinner.

”Hmmmmmmm... Moe suggested the same thing.” Homer thought to himself.

”Yeah Dad. Then jab a fork in his eye!” said Bart poking his fork at things.

”Um.... no...” said Homer.

Lisa was eating her food.

Meanwhile Oscar tries to explain he did something really bad at school but everyone is interested in Homer's story.

”I own a factory now.” said Bart. “Got it for a buck.”

”Yeah when something is of no interest or value to anyone at an auction any pin head can win something for pocket change...” said Lisa reading and eating.

Bart made a rude face at her.

Elsewhere in the attic.

Hugo had friends round.

”The freak has friends?” Homer gasped.

”Hey shut up!” Oscar snapped. “Yes Hugo has friends. Other outcasts of society and feral kids.”

In the attic Roger the gay pedo Alien was running a cocktail bar. Only he and Willie Nelson the onion spider and Quasimodo could drink.

Willie Nelson was trying to cannibalise Hugo or his other friends again.

Hugo ran about on all fours fleeing Willie Nelson the onion spider as he tried to kill him.

CatDog’s parts Cat was dealing with his brother, Dog’s antics. Dog was sniffing Oscar’s diaper. Oscar winced and honked Dog’s big wet shiny purple nose.

Peter Griffin’s hairless twin who lives in the tool shed once again was trying to offer everyone garbage to eat while drinking a martini Roger made.

Roger was trying to seduce Steve Smith again.

”Roger I’m only 15...” said Steve.

”So?” said Roger.

”Steve, he’s the Jimmy Saville of alien life forms...” said Oscar. “Or Jimmy Saville meets ET.”

Roger frowned.

Quasimodo drunk was talking to his gargoyles he bought with him.

”Quasi we’re just figments of your imagination! Get some help!” said Hugo the gargoyle.

Hugo Simpson winced.

”For the last time, Peter’s hairless twin... no! I don’t want a banana skin or a fish skeleton...” said Oscar.

”I’ve got a few cans of dog food with some food still stuck inside....” said Peter’s hairless twin.

”Oz some of these people were not allowed regular food by their families and had to eat garbage to survive... like myself...” said Hugo Simpson.

“I know... but I am still not eating garbage...” said Oscar.

Hugo sighed.

Downstairs.

Peter Griffin visited.

”I’m only here because my hairless twin is visiting “Hugo”.” said Peter. “What is he? Some sort of freak like my hairless twin or Meg?”

”Um sort of.” said Homer.

Marge glared at Homer.

”What?” Homer asked.

...

Homer tries to behave properly at work such as doing his job properly, addressing Frank properly and not calling him Grimey and eating properly.

However Frank isn't impressed and actually laughs at Homer's pathetic attempt to be a model worker.

Carl and Lenny reprimand him for being nasty about Homer.

”What is wrong with all of you?! Have you all got some sort of disease where you can’t see how stupid Homer is?!”

Carl frowned at him.

”Ever since Homer was employed, meltdowns have doubled. Fires have tripled. Has he been fired? No! Has he been disciplined? No no no!”

Smithers inspecting saw Frank ranting and raving. He had to do something.

”Ahem. A word in my office Frank.” said Smithers.

Frank gulped.

However he wasn’t in trouble.

”I’m so sorry sir for that tirade-“ said Frank.

”Oh don’t apologise Frank.” Smithers said warmly. Frank listened confused. “You see. I agree with you Frank. Homer is a dangerous, lazy, incompetent moron. I have no idea why Mr Burns hasn’t fired him permanently. Surprisingly Frank, he does get scolded and has lost his place here from some incidents. Ie crashing into a pipe releasing deadly radioactive gas because he was distracted... trying to cook a donut in the reactor core... But some how. Time and time again! Mr Burns rehires him! It sickens me!” Smithers ranted.

Frank nodded and smiled.

”I’m sorry Mr Burns shouted at you for saving that oaf Simpson’s life. I’ll try to get Nr Burns to see reason.” said Smithers.

...

The following morning after leaving Milhouse, Bart goes to see his factory only to find it collapsed in ruins and Milhouse staring at the ruins.

"Awwww Milhouse! I told you to keep an eye on it!" Bart groaned.

"I did! I saw the whole thing! First everything leaned one way then it all sort of collapsed!" said Milhouse.

"Wow... I wonder where all the rats will go now..." said Bart. Hundreds and thousands of rats scuttled out squeaking towards Moe's.

"Everybody tuck your pants into your socks" Moe yelled.

...

At home the Simpsons dress up and put a nice dinner on for Frank. Homer somehow convinced him to come round.

”Lisa be good.” Homer said to Lisa.

”Bart!” Bart had his wrist gadget with playing cards for card tricks up his sleeves. “No grifting!”

”Other kid behave.” Homer called Maggie other kid.

Maggie sucked her pacifier.

”Freak, go up to the attic and stay there!” said Homer to Hugo.

Hugo growled.

”Don’t call him a freak! Or I will kill you!” Oscar snapped.

”No you won’t Oscar.” said Marge. “Homer stop that! His name is Hugo! Address him properly! And besides he is eating dinner with us.”

Homer growled annoyed.

”Anyway what are we having?” Oscar asked.

”Lobsters. Homer do you think five lobsters is enough for us all and Frank?”

”Yes Marge.” said Homer.

”It’ll be more than enough. Dad I can’t eat shellfish... I’m allergic...” said Bart.

”And I’m vegetarian... remember?!” Lisa frowned.

”No vegetarianism or allergic reactions tonight!” said Homer.

The kids whined.

Suddenly Frank arrived.

Frank seems to think it's something very important as that was probably the only way Homer was able to get him to come round.

Homer introduces his family.

However Frank is not impressed when he finds Homer lives in a nice house, has a loving family and lobster for dinner despite his life of sloth and carelessness at work. He rants about unlucky he is in comparison.

Also he lives in a tiny apartment with a bowling alley above it and another below it. I imagine he never gets any peace...

"And all I have is this briefcase and this stupid haircut!" Frank ranted. "I live in an apartment above one bowling alley and below another! And what do you have in return for your life of sloth? A family, a nice house and (Smells something) Lobster for dinner!"

He then yells that in an ideal world Homer would have starved to death long ago. He then storms out.

"Well, that went well..." Bart remarked.

...

Frank then cruelly pranks Homer by leaving an edited poster for a kid's competition to build a new power plant on his desk. (All mentions that it's meant for kids are cut out.) He has done this to humiliate Homer in front of everyone. Homer signs up for it unaware it's for kids only.

Frank gloats as Homer goes home for the day, only to witness Homer smash into his car on the way out.

”Aw crap....” Frank groaned.

...

Elsewhere.

Bart is miserable his factory collapsed.

”Oh well, you only got it for a buck.” said Oscar.

Bart sighed.

Up in the attic.

Hugo’s friends were still round.

Roger the alien was still running a cocktail bar in the attic and moved the stuff Homer hoarded into Hugo’s bedroom.

Willie Nelson the onion spider was still trying to kill everyone.

Hugo winced as Willie Nelson was brandishing a knife.

Peter’s hairless twin was still sharing garbage with everyone.

”Look! I found a stuffed pepper! Still fresh!” said Peter’s hairless twin.

Dog, of CatDog was still sniffing everyone. Tomba winced as he got sniffed.

And Quasimodo was still talking to inanimate statues.

At the kid's competition Ralph is up first with a Malibu Stacy hotel.

"This was supposed to be a nuclear power plant! You lose! Get off my stage!" Mr Burns yells at him. Ralph stands there staring off into space.

"Get off the stage sweetie!" Chief Wiggum calls him to leave the stage. He eventually does so.

Next is Martin. Despite his impressive model of a futuristic power plant and even demonstrating that it's actually powering the entire room, Mr Burns finds it too cold and bleak and fails him.

Eventually Homer arrives on stage.

"Look everybody! It's Homer!" Frank laughs.

"Shhh! You're making us miss the contest!" Carl hushes him.

Homer's entry when asked by Mr Burns, who doesn't even recognise his own employee, is just the current plant except with racing stripes on the chimneys and giant coffee cup handles on them and a giant concrete donut built between them.

Mr Burns surprisingly loves the idea.

"First prize!" He gives Homer a medal.

"Whaaaat?!" Frank yells. "But it's a competition for children!"

"Yeah, and he beat all those snot nosed brats!" said Lenny.

"Does everyone have some sort of condition where they can't see what's wrong with Homer?! Agh! I can't take it anymore! Aaaaagh!" Frank goes insane and starts eating the donuts like a slob to make a point of how Homer acts, sits at his desk hitting himself and going "D'oh!" And commenting loudly that he won't do his job because someone else will do it for him.

"Give me a promotion!" He yells.

Then he goes to the bathroom and then comes back without washing his hands which he loudly explains to everyone.

"Grimey? Are you alright?" Homer asks him.

"Oh I'm more than alright! I'm Homer Simpson!" said Frank in mid breakdown.

"Hehehe! Sure you are!" Homer laughed.

Frank then tells Mr Burns that his the worst worker in the world and is now going home to eat lobster for dinner. However he then sees some exposed high voltage cables.

"Hmmm! Extremely high voltage! Well I don't need safety gloves because I'm Homer-"

Everyone winces as he electrocutes himself.

...

Frank Grimes had died. Everyone attended his funeral. However Homer fell asleep.

"Marge! Change the channel!" He yelled in his sleep. Everyone laughed at Homer.

Meanwhile Frank was watching from heaven.

"So you met Homer..." asked Mr Mackleberry, Sherri and Terri's dead father.

The end.

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