Holidays of Future Passed: Spaaaaaaace! The Saga continues. Bart owes Nelson Money, an evil alien threatens the universe and only Astronaut Maggie from Bart to the Future universe can save the day. There’s also glimpses at other potential futures and madness from Oscar as usual.
2012 in a timeline where the Simpsons age as normal as they should do. Ie post Simpsons Time Catastrophe.
A Friendly Mushroom wrote this. Well the start.
"Aaaaah! Mother of Einstein, Darwin and Steven Hawkins! Bart! This is your entire fault!" Lisa yelled.
Year 2012, date, new year's eve. Use full stops you mushroom! 15 years old Lisa Simpson ran around the streets close to Springfield's elementary school with her accursed brother running after her while the 17 years old teen tried to run faster while carrying the young 7 years old Maggie Simpson since the young girl, now the living image of her elder sister when Lisa was her age only wearing blue instead of red, wasn't fast enough to escape from their pursuer.
”Ow! Watch the pony tail Mags!” Mooch Bart’s ponytail is um a thing and characters like to pull it.
"What in the world were you thinking? Oh wait, don't tell me! You thought that stupid Mayan prophecy about the end of the world was real! So then you asked Nelson to lend you a few dollars you thought you would never have to pay! Then you as usual wasted it all in comic books!" Lisa ranted and yelled as the fled something.
”It’s not a stupid prophecy! You will all die!” A giant stone Mayan god yelled.
The Simpson kids winced.
"Don't blame me! They said it was the end of the world on the brain-o-vision! If you can't trust television who can you trust?" Bart spoke in self defense.
He then felt how Maggie pulled his ponytail and was about to speak when Bart interrupted the girl. "Don't pull the ponytail!" He yelled in annoyance, Maggie rolled her eyes and pointed at their pursuer, Nelson Muntz. "Waaaaah! Maggie! Normally no one can shut you up! Why didn't you said so earlier?" The young girl rolled her eyes in annoyance and was about to speak when Bart took the pacifier the girl always carries around her neck and pressed it against her mouth. "Oh bother! Will you ever shut up lil sis?"
”Bart...” Lisa sighed as they ran.
"Simpson!" Everyone flinched, Nelson was slowly catching up. "You owe me money you little bastard!" Nelson tried to grab Bart by the ponytail, only Lisa grabbed Bart's hand and changed their running direction, forcing them to run down of a hill and to fall down of it and roll around the mixture of snow and grass product of the global warning in Springfield until finally hitting the grey walls of a long abandoned house. "Come back here Simpson!" Nelson yelled from the top of the hill, he then moved his thumb around his neck in signal of a death sentence, Bart gulped at the view. "If you owe the bank 100 dollars that's your problem Simpson, if you owe the Nelson Bank 100 dollars then that's my problem!" Nelson said while cracking his knuckles, Bart just gulped.
"You owe 100 dollars to Nelson?" Bart just smiled oddly and pointed at Maggie. "Don't tell me it was your entire plan Maggie? Who did you want to get rid of this time?" The girl opened her mouth to speak but Lisa placed her pacifier at her mouth just as Bart did not long ago. "You know, just forget it! I don't wanna know, you two are always placing me in the middle of troubles! Why was I cursed with such a moronically brain washed group of nitwits as a family?" She yelled in annoyance. "I will handle this, you two leave before…" But before finishing her speech she noticed both Bart and Maggie were already running for their lives. "D’oh!" Lisa yelled.
Nelson arrived. Lisa trembled as his shadow covered her.
”Eep!” Lisa gulped.
”Hey relax Lis. It’s Bart who needs to pay. And I told you. I don’t dare touch girls. Girl bullies beat up girls, boys beat up boys...” said Nelson.
”Can we go out again?” Nelson asked.
”No!” Lisa yelled.
“Aw nuts...” Nelson sighed.
5023 AD backstory
On the world of Telkine which was in ruins, a deep voice spoke.
”None shall escape from the storm that is to come, though those who burnt the colonies are dead I shall never forget their slaughter of the sons of Telchine, Njord, and Montezuma. I will paint every one of their worlds with their blood, this is my plan for the rebirth of the Fellowship and the demise of humanity, I do not care whether or not my people agree or disagree with my views, I will purge this galaxy of every last shizno down to last man, women, and child.”
“Zleedrax! Call the fleet!” A deep voiced alien warlord bellowed. “We’re heading for planet Earth!”
Bart and Maggie arrived home and a friendly mushroom continued to forget how to use full stops. It’s like they have reverse Shatner syndrome...
”Bart what is it? Are you in trouble again?” Marge sighed.
”Nelson.” Maggie said before Bart stuffed her pacifier in her mouth. She made a muffled sound in protest.
”Bart stop that! Let your baby sister speak!” Marge told him off. “And do you owe Nelson money again...”
Then the A Friendly Mushroom insisted Nelson was violent towards women...
Nelson tried to hit Lisa but punched the wall hurting himself.
”Okay that’s enough you! You facinorous fungus! Nelson would not hit girls!” Oscar yelled at the mushroom. “That means extremely wicked. Use a thesaurus man!”
This future was also in the Clone wars future several fanfiction dot net writers are part of.
”Hello there.” said CGI Obi Wan.
”Uh.... we need to rename this time line...” said Lisa.
But Oscar insisted on Star Wars and General Grevious.
Apparently the clone wars were to do with the Treehouse of Horror Homer clones from XIII that have no belly buttons!
”Yeah apparently those clones came back or someone used my dad’s magic hammock to make clones of everyone and caused chaos.” said Lisa.
”Don’t remind me. Shortly after that Halloween episode Matt got another dumb Disney related lawsuit from Ducktales and Jimmy Neutron!” Oscar ranted in a demented rant. “Ducktales! Wooooooooooo oooooo!” He loves Ducktales.
“Booooooring...” Nelson sighed.
Anyway in the clone wars time lines characters end up in Frink’s basement and use his future predictions computer.
Nelson went on it thinking he could watch porn...
”Nelson there’s no porn on that! It’s a device that shows your future...” Lisa sighed.
Nelson saw a future with robot cops, ie robot Wiggum. The robot cops had ovens in their stomachs. Nelson was dismayed by the future because he had been arrested for stealing a chocolate bar from the Kwik e mart.
”And the sentence for stealing is... death!” said robot Wiggum.
”What?!” Future Nelson was horrified.
”Yes. I don’t like the law but President Lisa Simpson wrote it.
Nelson watched as his future self was given the electric chair...
”Lis why would you do that?!” Nelson cried.
”I don’t know! I don’t know....!” Lisa cried tearfully.
Days of Future Passed Timeline.
Shortly after the first episode of the saga. Lisa, Zia and Milhouse drove home. Lisa was happy her daughter looked up to her as a hero and wanted to be like her. And that she liked Star Wars. Or Cosmic wars of Galaxy Wars because the Simpsons think they’re not allowed to reference films or books etc. Well we got purple Yoda or Shmoda...
Milhouse sat in the front passenger seat fast asleep snoring and dressed in full burqa and face veil. Because in this timeline Michigan was taken over by an Islamic caliphate. Thanks liberals... And they thought he was a woman so he had to cover up.
”I overthrew and bombed that caliphate off the face of this Earth! Why is he still wearing that!?” Oscar asked annoyed.
The car broke down.
”Oh dear. The car! I’ll call Nelson!” said Lisa.
Milhouse felt small, downstairs. “Awww... you know I feel intimidated by him! Why can’t you call Bart?”
”Because... when I need my car fixed I call a mechanic. When I want a pathetic divorced failure with two kids who hate him, I’ll call my loser of a brother...” said Lisa. “Now go back to sleep dear.”
In this future once again they mentioned the clone wars. Mmmmmmmm, CGI filler of the movies...
”Hello there!” said Obi Wan.
Then Oscar arrived from the past with Bart and nearly got ran over.
”Oz?” Lisa asked.
”Ah! Killer Lisa! Ruuuuun!” Bart fab and they jumped through a time window.
Then while waiting for Nelson they investigated Frink’s house. He died in the clone wars or something.
Zia played on the future predictor. Her future showed her mother was pregnant again.
Lisa gave birth alone because Milhouse was too queasy and waited outside.
”Congratulations Mrs Van Houten Simpson. It’s a boy.”
The boy looked exactly like Milhouse so they called him Milhouse Jr.
”Uh I’m canon...” said Jimmy Van Houten. A Milhouse like boy made of balloons.
Oscar’s 23rd clone popped him with a needle.
”Oz enough of Jimmy...” Bart sighed.
Zia watched more. To her horror she found her mother would cheat on dad with Nelson.
”You’ll cheat on Dad?!” Zia gasped horrified.
”Well...... come on! Your father isn’t exactly a catch! And Nelson despite lying to me was sort of cute...” said Lisa.
”You’re a terrible role model!” Zia gasped.
And so the pieces of the clone wars fitted together. In this time line Kang and Kodos were creating clones of everyone...
“A possible way but...” said Oscar.
”Who else then, Oz?” Bart asked as the two boys hopped across time during the opening of Days of Future Passed: Back and Fourth/Backstory. With killer Lisa in pursuit.
”Die Bart! Must die!” Killer Lisa and James Bouvier pursued them.
“That annoying IP vandal who made those weird clones that yell “No! Those are in every Spring!”?” Oscar asked.
”Ah. That makes sense I suppose.” said Bart as they fled into another time line.
”Bartholomew!! Come back here now!” Lisa yelled insane and brainwashed.
”Dude seriously! You are wrecking my story! Bart is supposed to die!” A fictional version of Erik Nikolas yelled.
”No! I want to live!” Bart cried.
“Well I want Nelson to hit Lisa. But this bozo has to virtue signal...” said a mushroom.
”Dude you are sick if you want to write about men battering women...” Oscar snapped at the mushroom as they ran past.
They hopped from time lines to time lines. In Back and Forth we jump to the next day where they arrived in Big Town.
Springfield 5023 AD
It is the far and distant future. The original generation of the Simpsons were still alive but were probably hideous monstrosities that pray to the dark lord of the twin moons.
”All hail the Dark Lord of the Twin Moons.” Lenny chanted.
Although the Ancient one of Universe 3 could also be the supreme deity or the God Jellyfish.
However most of the action revolves around the Simpsons’ great, great, great x20ish grandchildren. Or how many generations you can feasibly have in three thousand years.
Bartrox XXIII was riding his hoverboard unaware as an alien foe watched.
"None shall escape from the storm that is to come, though those who burnt the colonies are dead I shall never forget their slaughter of the sons of Telchine, Njord, and Montezuma. I will paint every one of their worlds with their blood, this is my plan for the rebirth of the Fellowship and the demise of humanity, I do not care whether or not my people agree or disagree with my views, I will purge this galaxy of every last shizno down to last man, women, and child." A deep voiced alien reptilian alien called Ormph Tyrana had a cool monologue of how he is a violent, bloodthirsty maniac just because he was orphaned in a galactic war. He really, really hated humans.
On his desk sat a human newspaper about the clone wars. Apparently they started on Rigel VII. I have no idea why he had an old human newspaper.
In 51st century Springfield Orson Welles ate frozen pears and Ms Pells fish sticks. In a mouse cage Pinky was running on the mouse wheel and Brain was pacing around.
"Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering?" Brain asked after a moment.
"I think so. But where would we find a live chicken to use for the Pop-goes-the-Weasel thingy at this hour?" Pinky jumped up in excitement.
”You idiot!” Brain snapped.
This was on TV as Hugo was watching Pinky and the Brain with Oscar. He winced as he often asked Oscar if he was pondering what he himself was. And Oscar would reply with a nonsensical remark. Like that time he was thinking about lunch, asked Oscar if he was pondering the same thing but Oscar was asking why anyone would pierce Brosnan. Pierce Brosnan.
Hugo sighed as Oscar was wearing a diaper and letting his teddy bear creature sniff his diaper again.
Suddenly a huge space ship was in the sky.
”Holy moly!” said Homer as they went outside. No I have no idea how they’re still alive 3000 years later...
”Whoooooaaa!” said Oscar with a cybernetic arm and a cybernetic eye. He had more prosthetics installed after 2021.
The ship landed and steam hissed as the ramp came down. A reptilian alien with five or so eyes stepped out. He was clearly a malevolent alien, not a nice friendly one like ET.
The alien was Ormph Tyrana. Scourge of the Telkine system.
”Humans!” Ormph spat. He really hated humans. In fact he hated them the most. “The scum of the universe! You are not worthy! In fact I value your lives less than the gunk on the bottom of my shoes! Fear the wrath of Ormph Tyrana! Scourge of the Telkine system!”
”Don’t have a space cow man...” said Bart.
”Silence!!” Ormph snapped and vaporised him. There was only ashes after the green laser hit him. The Simpsons were horrified. Oscar discreetly revived Bart.
”Do you want to meet our leader?” Hugo asked.
”No! I don’t want to see any more disgusting humans! I have come here to annihilate every single foul human from the universe!” Ormph snapped.
The Simpsons gulped.
Future where Lisa married Nelson instead of Milhouse. Also deadly weather!
Nelson was in his garage seeing to a yellow and black hover car he was tinkering with because he’s a mechanic.
A cybernetic Arnie Pye was reading the weather. “Well Kent, we’re looking at Acid rain over Springfield.
We cut to Willie singing Singing in the rain in the corrosive acid rain.
”I’m singing in the rain! Just singing in the rain!” Willie sings. The acid rain then dissolves his umbrella. “Singing in the-Aaaaaaaaaaagh! It burns! It burns!! My eyes!” The Scottish groundskeeper screams as the acid rain burns him.
”And over Ogdenville expect Razor snow.” said Arnie.
Oscar was trudging through the snow and got skewered by razor sharp ice shards.
”Ouch...” he groaned.
”And over Los Angeles. Donut rain.” said Arnie.
Somewhere in L.A it rained donuts! Hooray!
Murphy Muntz brought out suitcases along with pregnant Lisa carrying some.
”Murphy I said don’t let your mother take any bags! She’s pregnant!” said Nelson.
”Nelson Mandela Muntz! As a strong independent woman, I don’t want you chivalry! It’s sexism!” Lisa snapped.
Nelson rolled his eyes. “Feminism has really gone nuts... Lis, you’re heavily pregnant! You should not be lifting things!”
Oscar went past with bloody ice shards puncturing him.
Then Jeffrey the alien went past walking an xenomorph as a dog.
Then Maggie was chased by Pikachus.
”Um okay...” said Nelson.
Meanwhile Bart in this universe was a judge. No not Judge Dredd. A regular court judge.
”Well at least somewhere in time and space I’m successful...” said Bart. “Order! Order in my court!” He banged his gavel hammer.
“All rise for the case of Kearney Zzyzwicz. Charged with armed robbery.” said the plaintiff.
”It wasn’t me! It was the monster!” Kearney whined.
”May I remind the defendant not to discuss the existence of monsters in my court room...” Bart sighed.
“What about cryptids?” Oscar asked.
”Or cryptids... or mythical creatures or aliens...”
”Okay my testimony begins of wrongful accusations and theft and goblins!!” said Kearney.
”Mr Zzyzwicz...” Bart said annoyed.
”Okay, no goblins...” Kearney sighed.
”And now you disgusting creatures have assaulted my eyes long enough! Prepare to die!” Oormph Tyrana seething with anger vaporised the Simpsons or tried to but Oscar teleported them away.
The Simpsons had teleported to a weapons storage room. There were guns on the wall. And even an ICBM Missile resting in clamps.
”Where are we?” Bart asked.
“My armoury.” said Oscar. “I’m stocking up to kick Ormph Tyrana’s alien ass off of your planet and save your bacon.” said Oscar.
”Mmmmmm! Bacon...” Homer drooled.
”You said that as if you’re not from Earth. Are you an alien?” Bart asked.
”No. I’m from Earth, just not one entirely populated with yellow people.” said Oscar.
Holidays of Future Passed: Family Reunion, Electric Mayhem’s story.
Homer is old and angry. He goes to Moe's, and now that Moe already killed himself (Poor Moe...), Barney runs the bar.
“Hey Barney.” said Homer angry and bitter at the world.
Homer watches TV and drinks a Duff when The Addams Family Reunion comes on TV as part of the "long lost centuries old marathon of cheesy family movies" on TV. Gomez Addams is kissing his wife Morticia.
Barney starts talking, and says "Aw, that was a (Belches) movie", leaving it unknown if he liked it or not.
Homer calls his family. Marge explains that Selma is dating a robot Brad Pitt. Coooool!
Chances are this robot somehow breaks programming out of disgust and leaves Selma like her last robot husband.
Or a robot Angelina Jolie steals him.
Speaking of which. Hollywood and Sony were mass executed by firing squad on orders from Emperor Oscar, yes Ozzy... to stop them ever, ever! Rebooting Tomb Raider with a different actress for Lara because the reboot sucks. I love Angelina Lara or PlayStation Lara with giant boobs.
In Tomb Raider 5... Lara seeks out more strange artefacts while dealing with Daniel Craig! Oh and it sucked that he wasn’t in Cradle of Life! I don’t care if he was busy! What the hell was that with Lara’s sudden Jailbird boyfriend?!
Homer later reluctantly came home. He was bitter and drank because in this universe his wife Marge’s recent, as of this season, bout of hyper broodiness went out of control and she got very nasty threatening to leave Homer if he wouldn’t give her more kids. They ended up having more and more to satisfy her extreme broody fuelled demands until they had more children than the Spucklers. Cue lots of kids running about the house fighting and breaking things.
”Kids!! Stop fighting!” Homer yelled. His many kids stopped. “I need a lie down...” he sighed.
Robot Brad Pitt malfunctioned and Marge brushed the broken robot aside. The door rang. “Ooooooh! Who’s that?!” She said annoyed.
The visitor was adult Bart from the Holidays of Future timeline with his sons Kirk and Picard.
”You got kicked out of the house again?!” Homer screamed.
Troy McClure was a ghost in this universe, Damn you Mrs Hartman! Damn you to Hell!
Losa was pregnant with another child. Which ElectricMayhem explained why Homer was grumpy and bitter. Yeah sure.... my reason makes more sense.
And Apu was outside being chased by a Cyborg Snake. Probably that Robocop Snake with Chaingun arms.
Oscar unveiled a space ship.
”You have a ship?!” Bart asked.
”Yes. I’ll probably need an entire fleet to take down Oormph. And this baby took a few blasts and needs some repairs after that time Lordakia came back with yet another evolved form....” said Oscar.
”So we’re going into space?” Homer asked.
”Dog fights with space craft usually takes place outside the stratosphere... yes...” said Oscar.
“Actually the Exosphere.” said Hugo. “That’s the last layer before space.”
”Quiet you!” Homer snapped.
Suddenly a mechanised cry of “Spaaaaaaaace!”
“What the?!” Bart gasped as a flying metal orb yelled Space at them.
”Oh that’s the Space core from Portal 2. Just ignore him....” Oscar sighed.
Future Where Nelson is executed for stealing a candy bar.
In 2012 from A Friendly Mushroom’s contribution to season 24, Nelson horrified and depressed watched over his future where he will suffer a grisly fate on the electric chair thanks to his kleptomania and in away his ex girlfriend’s tenure as president and strict new laws.
”Nelson Mandela Muntz! You’re under arrest for stealing that candy bar!” said Robot Wiggum with an oven in his chest.
”Okay! I’ll go to jail...” Nelson sighed.
”Oh no, you don’t go to jail. The penalty for stealing under President Simpson’s new law is death!”
Nelson gasped horrified.
”Ah... I feel great now I’m doing my job properly. I have a cool new robot body and an oven in my stomach...” said Chief Wiggum.
He reminisced as they took Nelson to a Death Row prison where prisoners spend their last days before facing execution.
One evening Jenda dumped Bart.
”We’ll live on a train and we’ll never have to stop! We’ll keep going and going!” said Bart.
”Um... Bart I want to know you’ll provide for us... and any kids we might have... sorry but I need someone with a future...” Jenda dumped him.
”You’re breaking up with me?!” Bart gasped.
”I’m sorry Bart...” said Jenda leaving.
Bart cried and sobbed as she left.
”Okay lovers move on- Oh wait this kid’s alone!” said Robot body Wiggum.
Bart was crying and sniffling.
”Oooooh! Don’t cry son! Here, have some turkey. Careful I’m hot inside my stomach oven.” said Wiggum revealing he had an oven in his stomach with a turkey spinning around on a spit cooking. Bart tearfully took a leg from it and ate.
”Yeah that’s it.... now you’ll have to move along Bart.” said Wiggum.
Wiggum sighed while driving his hover van with Nelson and other criminals in the back. He reminisced some more.
”Oscar Tamaki.” He had arrested Oscar in a seedy alleyway. “You’re under arrest for assault and battery and affray. (Violent fighting). You have a right to-“
Jurkle was there too for some reason. Why he was in the wrong place I don’t know.
Oscar suddenly grabbed Jurkle and stuffed him in Robocop Wiggum’s Stomach Oven.
”Hey!” said Wiggum.
”Oz! This is really inappropriate and offensive!” Jurkle yelled from inside Wiggum. Jurkle is Jewish by the way.
”I know...” Oscar giggled.
The Simpsons and Oscar got on the space ship. Which highly resembled the Millennium Falcon. There was a hairy dog man on there.
”Graaaaaaaagh! Rrrrrrrrrrrr!” The hairy dog man made Chewbacca sounds.
The Simpsons winced.
”Strap yourselves in.” said Oscar.
Meanwhile Oormph Tyrana gathered up his fellowship of alien tyrants and space thugs to destroy Earth and avenge his people who were ruthlessly slaughtered. Oh and this fellowship probably has space hobbits etc. Mmmmmm! Tolkien....
”Now my friends...” said Ormph pacing up and down. In his fellowship of evil were, Kang and Kodos and some other Rigellians. Klingons, Daleks, the Christmas Tree Aliens from Bart’s Treehouse of Horror comics and Lordakia in another evolved form.
”I appreciate your alliance Ormph, for once I want to conquer or destroy Earth.” said Lordakia. “I’m still reeling from my last humiliating defeat.”
”Yes my friend. But victory will be sweet. Like that time we destroyed Kathorga XII.
Elsewhere Oscar was flying about in space to where Ormph’s kill satellite was.
To pass the time the Simpsons remembered their previous adventures.
In Ancient Legend. To wait out until they got picked up by emergency services the Simpsons and Oscar lived off food parcels wrapped in banana leaves.
For basic survival food, Marge made them sound exotic and fancy.
”Grilled Red Snapper and for dessert, passion fruit compote.” said Marge. Red snappers were local fish in the seas around the island and passion fruit plants grew throughout the island.
”Sounds great but I hope that’s not the only things we can eat here.” said Bart.
”Oh don’t worry, this isn’t like when your family were overrun with peaches and we had peach everything... Or that cartoon about the clown on a tropical island where they only had bananas and coconuts... so when they found a recipe book everything tasted of banana and coconut...” said Oscar.
Clownja winced as a Oscar has summoned a bearded Robinson Crusoe islander/Tom Hanks. And a sailor duck!
Oscar sang Charlie Chalk.
And this line exists for filler to meet my five Ipad Screens worth of story. You put the lime in the coconut! You drink em both up! You put the lime in the coconut! You drink em both up!
The last time, apart from Something Weird IV, when Lordakia attacked
Long, long after his last attack in Something Weird this way comes IV Lordakia came back. It was probably deep in season 32 or something where Bart is a golf caddy, And Homer is obsessed by a pizza parlour animatronic band...
Lordakia was blasting energy beams and plasma torus blasts at things.
Dark Oscar was frustrated by him constantly coming back in stronger and deadlier forms. Like Cell from Dragon Ball Z.
Dark Oscar and Gotenks and SSJ Goku and Chuck Norris had just pulverised Lordakia.
He flew out of a crater a ragged, blown apart wreck with gaping holes in him. Suddenly he healed and turned into Kaiser Lordakia.
”Oh come on!” Dark Oscar groaned.
Wheelchair Superman (Christopher Reeve) arrived followed by N Sync and they helped. And so did Ben Tennyson from Ben 10 Stupidity force. (The funniest fan fiction I ever read!)
Ben turned into Reo, an Oreo alien. I told you it’s stupid and hilarious! And get this, his aliens have Viking based Ultimate forms...
”Hinger dinger durgen!” said Viking Reo, Ben as an Oreo based alien.
There’s also Upchuck Norris...
And those Homer clones that go “No! Those are in every Spring! No! Those are in every Summer!”
”You are more annoying than Cell now die!” Oscar unleashed a spirit bomb on Kaiser Lordakia.
He died but like Something Weird this way comes IV absorbed Agent OVERLOAD and turned into Death Kaiser Lordakia.
”Fuuuuuuck!” Oscar cursed.
”Oz language!” Gotenks told him off.
They got more help from Fly Boy Bart, Dark Lisa, Thanos...
”I want to keep the balance. Lordakia is unbalancing the universe.” said Thanos finger snapping Lordakia away into atoms.
”Yeah sure, California Raisins....” said Oscar making fun of him being purple.
However Lordakia came back as... Neo Kaiser Lordakia. Well there’s a Neo Kaiser Glider in Yugioh and and a Neo Bahamut. Apparently the prefix Neo makes things better...
”Oh come on! You have more annoying stupid evolved forms with dumb prefixes than a Digimon!” Oscar ranted.
”Hey!” Tai Kamiya yelled. “Teach him a lesson NeoUltraMagnaGigaWarGreymon!”
Oscar sweat dropped at such existence of yet more evolved forms for Greymon. Apparently there’s a level after Mega. And I thought ImperialDramon Paladin mode was ridiculous.
”And stop copying my hair and goggles!” Tai yelled.
Oscar turned Tai into a baby wearing a diaper. Tai promptly soiled himself.
”Now I’ll write extremely explicit gross out humour diaper fan fictions about you being tormented by my teddy bear creature Teddy. And piss off kink shamers on Deviantart!” Oscar ranted.
An Orchestral version of the Super Metroid theme played as space ships gathered. As well as Oscar’s there was the Planet Express ship and... “The entire fleet of the fourth bountiful human empire of the 51st century.” said Oscar. “And the entire fleet of the Binface people of Sigma IX”
As the fleet gathered Lordakia arrived.
”So you fools just won’t lay down and die.” said Lordakia.
”Ugh... No. we won’t. Now go away... Our beef is with Ormph Tyrana, not you...” said Oscar.
”Beef?! I am beefless!” said Lordakia referencing Fawful. “But you don’t understand child. You declare war on Ormph Tyrana the scourge of the Telkine system, you’ve declared war on the Fellowship...”
Oscar was confused. “Wait why are you in he Telkine fellowship. Your fleet attacked Tyrana’s people in the fellowship vs DAKA war! Which resulted in the deaths of his family. If he should be mad at anyone, it’s you!” said Oscar. “Why does he hate man?”
”What is man? A miserable pile of secrets! But enough talk! Have at you!” Lordakia quoted Dracula from Castlevania.
Oscar winced and the alliance fired on Lordakia.
Lordakia just healed from the lasers.
”Oh no you don’t!” Oscar snapped and summoned random characters ie Gotenks, Chuck Norris, Christopher Reeve as Wheelchair bound Superman, Superman in a wheelchair basically. Okra Winfrey and Tyrannosaurus Sex.
”How are they breathing in outer space?” Bart asked.
”I have no idea. Better put a cartoon fish bowl space helmet on Gotenks.” said Oscar summoning a fish bowl on Gotenks’s head so he can breath.
Lordakia was strong enough to fight Chuck Norris and not be immediately pulverised by his roundhouse kick or killed by his stare. So Chuck turned into Upchuck Norris.
”Shinnnnnyyyy!” said Stupidity Force Ben Tennyson.
The Care Bears fired Care Bear stare tummy rainbow beams at Lordakia.
The violent space battle continued with Lordakia just turning into more powerful forms like Neo Kaiser Lordakia. So Oscar summoned Neo Bahamut king of dragons to fire Terra Flare at him. Lordakia tried to survive but Ganon from Faces of Evil fired a Die! Bolt at him.
”Die!” said Ganon. And that destroyed Lordakia once and for all.
”At last...” Oscar sighed.
In Minus 4X Maggie was a vampire overlord.
”Cooooool!” said Ace the vampire kid in that universe.
Also Eric Cartman insisted there was a creature known as the Jewpacabra. Jurkle roundhouse kicked him. “Ow! Meeeeeeeem!” He whined.
In Another universe various animated sitcoms were making the next Jake and the Fatman.
Family Guy got the wrong idea and just made a cutaway where William Conrad was just really fat and obese and constantly thinking about food.
”I have a real problem with grilled cheese.” said William Conrad.
“Wow Lucky Piquel really let himself go after he parted ways with Bonkers D Bobcat...” said Oscar of that universe. Um FG 777 or something.
”I thought it was about my dad, whom I call the Fatman.” said Stewie Griffin.
American Dad’s Steve and Roger did get the right idea though and made a Cop buddy drama called Wheels and the Legman. With Roger as Wheels, the wheelchair bound partner. However Steve wanted to be wheels so the idea never got off the ground as they both wanted to be wheels and then Roger got high on Ketamine and ate America’s version of Wotsits and called Steve a Nazi walrus bastard and mistook Klaus for Garfield.
Rick and Morty came up with a cop buddy drama called Baby Legs in which a man from the waist down had a baby’s legs and pelvis and was wearing a diaper. Oscar was disappointed there were no diaper messing gags or gross out toilet humour.
Meanwhile Vampire Maggie bit people. Ace ate a nectarine and spat out the stone.
”A Neck-tarine.” He grinned,
”Not funny, Ace...” Bart as a vampire sighed.
Vampire Oscar was making references to the film, The Lost Boys, The Lost boys from Peter Pan and River Phoenix being dead.
In 5023 AD. “Well I believe the space sequences need more lasers and proton torpedos...” said Oscar.
”I have to agree and phowwwwn! Phoooooown! (Waving an imaginary lightsaber about) and Rrrrrrrrgh!” Lisa agreed doing Star Wars sounds.
Bart winced. “Okay sis, you are now officially weird...”
Que space battles with lasers and shit and Death Stars...
The last time Lordakia attacked.
Oscar had just turned Tai from Digimon into a baby. Tai grimaced and whined as Teddy, Oscar’s living teddy bear creature sniffed his diaper with his big wet shiny black nose. Tai sweated as Teddy continued sniffing him.
Maggie and Eric primary canon Ie the author who created Eric Simpson.
Eric took over from Bart as the main character in most episodes apart from the dull Homer and Marge ones...
Maggie took over from Lisa except she wasn’t as clever academically and preferred rock music. Also she was older than Eric rather than younger. So she spent the time bossing him about.
Bart now worked for XL corp. a company that makes everything that everyone uses. IE toasters and blenders etc. It’s like the Capsule Corporation that Bulma and Trunks work for in that everything everyone uses comes from there.
Meanwhile in the space battles with Ormph Tyrana and Lordakia.
Oscar’s ship was communicating over Skype with the enemy. Cue Ormph Tyrana swearing obscenities and vowing to wipe out humans.
Homer screamed when he saw the aliens. “Oh my god, space aliens. Don’t eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!”
The Simpsons glared at him.
”My species doesn’t eat beings clever enough to talk... and that’s an old stereotype of aliens eating people...” said a member of the evil fellowship.
”If it’s a fellowship where’s the space hobbits?” Oscar whined.
Bart sighed. “Ignore him... oh wait you can’t. He’s our captain...”
Then Lordakia appeared.
”I liiiiiive!” He yelled.
”No you don’t! Chuck Norris.” Oscar asked Chuck Norris. Chuck glared at Lordakia ordering him to die via his iron will. Lordakia died again.
”Enough! I will destroy you pesky cockroaches!” Ormph ranted.
”Screw this space battle! I don’t want to fight. Let’s all go to the space hobbit planet!” said Oscar. And they flew to a planet of space hobbits!
”No Oz!” Bart whined.
Along the way Oscar contracted cornflakes disease. Cue cornflakes bursting out of him as he holds his jacket open.
Ormph caught up with them and turned into a hideous creature. “Behold my true form! And despair!”
”No. now stop quoting things...” Oscar groaned.
Then since this is a Holidays of Future passed episode.
Kirk and Picard Simpson arrived in space suits with laser guns.
”Actually they’re Jiff and Skippy now, Oz” said Bart.
”Why?” Oscar asked.
”Because I really, really like peanut butter...” said Bart.
Oscar winced doing an anime face fault.
Then Eric Simpson arrived.
”Oh look, the troll doll arrived...” said future Nelson.
”Hey! Stop dissing my hair!” Eric yelled pointing to his blue anime-ish hair.
Everything in Erik’s multiple universes
Erik really wanted all his universes mentioned so here we go.
In one universe Maggie was killed by Pikachus on the Ural Mountains. Yes Pikachus....
”Pikachuuuuuuuuuuu!” They cried and used thunderbolt.
In another she was an astronaut.
In another she was a vampire overlord.
In another she fought terminators. In another she was a megazord!
”Maggie sure does a lot of interesting things in other universes.” said Eric Simpson.
In yet another Maggie was voiced by James Earl Jones. My favourite universe.
”This is indeed a disturbing universe.” said James Earl Jones voiced Maggie.
”Aaaaaaaagh! Darth Vader Maggie!” Oscar screamed.
“Pay attention to me! I’m trying to kill you!” Ormph Tyrana yelled firing lasers at the ships of the Alliance.
“No you’re boring.” said Oscar.
”Boring?! How dare you!” Ormph snapped. He fired more lasers.
Oscar was day dreaming about hotdog people.
”Oz! We’re being shot at!” Bart whined.
”I’ll take the helm!” said a Somali pirate. “Look at me! Look at me! I am the captain now!”
Dizzyland’s the Little Merboy.
The sea creatures were singing under the sea again.
”Under the sea! Under the sea! Where there’s no accusations! Just friendly crustaceans! Under the seeeeeaaaaa!”
Bart was playing clam drums, Lisa, a coral saxophone and Marge a guitar.
Doo doo dooo dooo doo doo!
”Down where it’s wetter! Down where it’s better! Under the seaaaaaaaa!”
Oscar as a diaper wearing Merboy was dancing to the music.
”This song is fair uuuuuuuse so Disney can’t sue! Under the seeeeeeaaaaaa!”
Homer then ate all the poor sea creatures again.
One day Lisa went swimming and was killed by her baby sister Maggie as some sort of evil siren. Evil mermaids that lure sailors to their deaths by singing.
Oscar was lured into trouble by promises of having his deepest wishes granted. To have his own orchestra called Oscar’s Orchestra and be a sentient blue piano. By an evil sea hag octopus lady called Ursula.
Meanwhile Baby Eric was a young blue haired prince as Prince Eric. He had big sheepdog called Max who sniffed things with his big wet shiny black nose. Oscar spying on the human ship on night was aroused by the dog and wanted to be sniffed by him. Ariel was more interested in Prince Eric.
"Where is Atlantica City anyway, Dad?" Lisa asked. "What is it like there?"
“It’s underwater, there’s mermaids and mermen and dumb singing sea creatures. Stupid flounders!” He was annoyed by some flounders.
Then that Lisa’s Maggie killed her too.
”Maggie stop killing in this universe!” Bart as a Merboy groaned.
League of the Homers from the multiverse
In a Legion of Doom meeting room sat round a huge table were Homers from various universes and points in time from Treehouse of Horror XXIII (BlueKraid).
”Crush them! In the name ah Jebus!” Snarled Pope Homer.
”Oooooooooh!” Dandy Fop/Georgian Homer groaned in a camp manner as he looked through a monocle. “Can’t we just mildly reprimand them?”
Caveman/Renaissance Homer hooted and grunted while smacking things with his club.
Main story. 5023 AD
The Simpsons encountered Wheatley and the Space Core.
”Spaaaaaaaaaace!” Space Core yelled.
”Oh shut up! 700 light years and your still screaming that!” Wheatley yelled. “There’s a squirrel.
The Simpsons and Oscar and Chewie and the Somali pirate winced because there was a squirrel on the ship.
The ship,lurched violently and sparked as lights flickered because they were being fired at by Ormph Tyrana.
”Don’t ignore me you apes!” He snarled firing lasers at them.
”Damn dirty apes!” Oscar yelled on the spaceship’s video communicator.
”Oz no!” Bart groaned.
Maggie in this universe was some sort of Venus flytrap/Poison Ivy that controlled plants.
”Oh baby!” Oscar wearing nothing except a diaper was aroused by his plant monster fetish as vines tied him up. He got horny as sentient plants tried eating him, tying him up, sliming him etc.
Maggie was some sort of green plant woman in a giant Venus flytrap wearing a diaper.
Oscar was put in a Venus flytrap and winced as it closed on him.
“I gotta get the new Bonestorm or I'll be as uncool as Milhouse.” said Plant Bart.
“I'm standing right here, Bart.“ said Plant Milhouse.
“Hey, that's great!“ said Plant Bart sheepishly as Milhouse frowned at him.
Jimbo as a plant monster arrived.
”Hey dweebs. Some crazy lady is at the Try and Save trying to break all the copies.“
Bart and Milhouse arrived at the Try N Save to find the crazy lady was Bart’s mom!
Marge was protesting video game violence and breaking copies so Bart couldn’t get one.
”Right that’s it lady, you’re coming with us...” security guards arrested her.
”Ugh! Unhand me you big bullies!” Marge snapped. Then she pepper sprayed one of them.
”Ow! My eyes! It burns!” A guard cried.
Chris Chan winced.
Bart rolled his eyes and bought one of the copies his mom didn’t get to.
Meanwhile Oscar cracked jokes about if Amazonia Maggie ever used Amazon while a plant creature with a big wet shiny red nose sniffed his diaper. Oscar honked and squeezed its nose.
”Oz stick to the story!” Bart groaned as the ship lurched and lights flickered and sparked as Ormph fired upon them.
”I am! But Erik wants to talk about all the alternate universes!” said Oscar.
Bart winced as the fan fiction writer Erik wrote about more parallel universes.
The universe where two Maggies as twin sisters, one is a living dart board and one is a bat of some kind.
”Erik no!” Bart groaned as the story cuts to Maggie’s room where she’s a living dartboard and her clone is a bat.
“Even I think that universe is ridiculous....” said Oscar.
”So... Do you use Amazon....” Oscar smirked as he lied on his back in a wide open Venus Flytrap um trap. He was wearing nothing except a diaper. Vines restrained him by holding his ankles and coiled around his wrists. He giggled as a cartoon plant creature with a big red shiny nose was sniffing his diaper.
Maggie as some sort of plant monster from Resident Evil rolled her eyes. “Uh... No....”
Oscar grunted and wriggled as the cartoon plant creature sniffed his diaper with its big red shiny nose.
In this universe Maggie is a black market dealer who sells internal organs. She also performs illegal back alley surgeries.
Bart of that universe winced.
Oscar in this universe required her services. “Yes I would like some gills.”
”Okay lie on air hockey table. I remove lungs. Gills will be ready in three days.” said Maggie standing in a seedy back alley holding a scalpel.
Oscar was in Maggie the vampire queen’s castle singing I’m king Henry the VIII I am! Repeatedly.
Maggie hissed and grabbed him and bit his neck. She drained him of his blood and he became a vampire.
”Cool! I’m a vampire now! By the way Mags. Is your grandma Mona a vampire in this universe?” Oscar as a vampire asked.
”Yes... I turned my family into vampires first.... why?” Vampire Queen Maggie asked.
”Holy moly! There’s a Mona the vampire! Monaaaaaaa! The vampiiiiiire!” Oscar sang the Mona the vampire theme tune...
The Simpsons were exchanging laser fire with Ormph Tyrana While Erik Nikolaz made more alternate universes.
There was now an android Maggie mega genius. She would go on all the game shows and win all the prize money.
During a planet surface battle.
“To the bowels of The Dark Lord go the wicked!" Ormph Tyrana shouted, as they rammed their plasma blade through the abdomen of yet another Somite warrior that thought he could slay him/They/Whatever. Pathetic creatures, they and their forsaken forbearers.
In this sub story arc there were a Borg like race called the Thrall collective. Seraph was a member of them and at one point after trying to assimilate the Simpsons decided just to join their crew. However they liked eating pancreases...
”We are the Thrall collective!” said a Thrall ship. “You will be assimilated! Resistance is futile!”
”What is it you actually want. Aside from ripping off the Borg...” Kirk Simpson groaned.
”Well we’re hungry and could go for some pancreases right now.” said the Thrall.
Kirk grimaced exasperated.
”They can have my pancreas. It never worked right...” said Oscar taking his insulin.
”We prefer Njord Pancreases.” said the Thrall collective.
Njord are creatures or perhaps people the Thrall eat the pancreases of. Oh apparently they’re space squids from a desert planet.
”That is ridiculous...” Lisa sighed.
Oh and Bart is in a relationship with a human adopted by the Telkine, Ormph Tyrana’s race, called Thel Knara.
”What is it with you and getting kinky with aliens...” Oscar sighed.
”She’s human, not an alien...” said Bart. “And that’s racist. Humans can fall in love with aliens...”
Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Universe
There was an alternate universe where the Simpsons were Jojo’s Bizarre Adventures characters.
For example Homer as Jonathan Joestar.
”Wryyyyyyyyyyyyyy!” Ace the vampire kid hissed and stopped time to drop steam rollers on people and toss knives at the steam roller. “Muda! Muda! Muda! Muda!”