Go Home Oscar wakes up on day to find his adventures with the Simpsons never happened they were just a diaper rash induced dream. However while watching the Simpsons an inter dimensional rift opens up and they can enter his world and visa versa. However do the Simpsons want to know the real Oscar. Based on my life back near the first two years of the Simpsons!
Oscar woke up in his room when he was just two years old. He was in his crib bed wearing his feety pyjamas (which are violet blue with yellow circles. At the othe end of his bed are a huge pile of teddies. Oscar wanders if this is a dream but its not especially since a painful rash from his butt confirms he has a diaper rash.
Teddy sniffs his diaper burying his big wet shiny black nose into his crotch. Oscar winced as Teddy sniffed him.
His folks soon wake up and change him. Then his mom has to wipe his nose. (I was a snotty toddler!) Then after breakfast he spent the day playing with his teddies and nicking his brother's glasses.
However while watching the Simpsons and half falling asleep on his sandwich quarters a flash of green lightning brings the Simpsons to his house.
"Ay carumba! Where are we?" Bart asked.
"Sheesh! What a dump!" Homer comments. Which offends Oscar's family.
"Whoa! That's some crazy hair lady!" Oscar's older brother comments on Marge's hair. Oscar rolls his eyes.
Marge hmmmms offended at remarks of her tall blue hair.
"These people are just dull! Except that kid with egg sandwich smooshed over his face wearing the bib. That's some funky hair he has." Bart comments.
"Bart that's just bed hair, he's obviously just woken up." said Lisa. "Why he's fallen asleep on his sandwiches I don't know..."
Oscar blushed as his his mom cleaned his face before putting his blue shiny pacifier in his mouth. He sucked his pacifier as he was picked up and put down to see the strange yellow people.
"Hey kid, what's your name?" Bart asked Oscar.
"He doesn't talk much. We're actually worried as he hasn't said his first words yet..." said Oscar's mom. "He's Oscar by the way."
Oscar showed them round by toddling as his thick diapers made it difficult to walk.
Oscar wordlessly showed off his shared room with his bigger brother. He had a clown toy box that looked really creepy.
"Ay carumba! A clown!" Bart yelped.
"Bart you love Krusty..." said Lisa.
"Only Krusty. I still get creeped out by other clowns."
Oscar showed off his enormous pile of teddies including a mother kangaroo and her Joey and some plushies of TV characters he liked.
"Ha nice collection of plushies kiddo." Bart teased the toddler.
"Bart he's only two. It's perfectly normal for kids his age to have soft toys." Marge told Bart off.
Oscar threw a green pentagon printed soccar ball plush with a duck hatching out of it at Bart's head. It softly bounced off of his head but was thrown hard enough to hurt slightly.
"Ow!" Bart groaned.
Oscar's older brother was playing a NES and was playing Duck Hunt with a super scope.
"Can I play?" Bart asked.
"No!" said the kid with glasses.
Bart rolled his eyes at the kid's rudeness.
"Never mind, our stuff is so much better. Hey Oscar wanna see our house?" Lisa asked.
Oscar nodded. Homer carried him as they went back into the TV.
Oscar looked around the Simpsons house. It was blindingly pinkish purple and orange and pink everywhere. They showed him around. The house was bigger than his, way bigger. Oscar was used to basic downstairs rooms, a family room, a dining room and a tiny kitchen. Therefore he was surprised they had extra rooms such as a rear lounge for watching TV, freeing up the front room for just sitting. There was a fire place too.
"Nothing much happens here. This is just the front room for talking and guests." Bart explained.
The hall was the same size as he expected but passing into the large dining room he noticed door ways leading off to the kitchen and another to another corridor.
"That's the kitchen for breakfast. We usually only have dinner in here." said Lisa.
Oscar was curious of the other corridor.
"That's the garage corridor. Only ways out of there is the garage, the basement and the rumpus room." Homer explained.
"Basically the play room with Maggie's toys and a games console." Bart explained. There was a back room decorated with an alphabet carpet and toys everywhere.
"All that's left is upstairs but. Well, it's not polite to snoop to go through people's rooms." said Homer.
"Homer I'm sure our rooms are in immaculate conditions for Oscar to look at. I hope so Bart..." Marge replied as they went into the staircase hall.
"Oscar that's the downstairs toilet." Lisa explained. "You don't need to go do you?"
Oscar shook his head. He then went in the coat closet.
"That's a closet..." Lisa sighed.
Upstairs they showed him the bedrooms. The master bedroom, Bart's room, Lisa's room and Maggie's room. As well as an upstairs closet and a shared bathroom. Wandering back into the master bedroom he noticed he missed another bathroom connected only to the master bedroom, it must be Marge and Homer's only. That would leave the other for the kids.
"Well, that's everything except the attic, the basement and the garage. You won't find them very interesting though. Besides they're not safe for a baby." Lisa explained.
Oscar then realised he should have gone to toilet when asked because he suddenly messed his diaper with a wet splat. He cried because of the horrid mess.
"Oh dear." Marge took him to be changed.
The Simpsons then took him home. They all had dinner before they had to return to their world or be stranded for ever in 3D world. They said their goodbyes and left for good.
Soon it was time for bed for Oscar and he was put in his pyjamas and put to bed in his crib bed. He went to sleep and dreamt of the Simpsons.
Some time before Oscar murdered his parents.
Oscar close to his ninth birthday was playing with his toys when out of Clownja’s box came a green cocoon with orange hair.
“SURPRISE!” Rik Mayal scared the crap out of Oscar and he screamed.
“Ugh! You’re all grown up and ugly! Yeeeeuck!” said Rik Mayal.
“Fred I’m only eight, well eight and a half.” said Oscar.
“Yeah but I bet you don’t wear those stinky plastic pants you poo in anymore.” said Fred.
“My nappies? No of course not. My parents beat that out of me...” said Oscar.
“Why the mega bitches!” Fred yelled.
Oscar smirked glad to have someone who believed him.
“Where’s the toys? Where are the toys?!” Fred went through Oscar’s toys. He found two of Big Mouth’s dolls.
“Hello Jemima! Hello Bethany! You’re gonna die!! Aaaaaaaaagh! (Bites head off doll and spits it out) Bleeeeeh!”
“Mr Poo! You die too!” said Fred finding Oscar’s monkey teddy Mr Poo.
“No Fred! Not Mr Poo!” Oscar whined.
“No no no! Yes yes yes!” Fred pretends to have a conversation with the teddy. Suddenly he starts tearing the monkey teddy a part and rips out its stuffing while making demented screams. “No! Not my intestines! Not my intestines! Yaaaaaaaaagh!”
There was a mess of white stuffing on the bedroom floor.
“Um.... let’s blame that on Mom like when she killed Dolpha...” said Oscar.
“Oscar!!” Mom yelled angry about something.
“Uh oh.” said Oscar.
“Is it?! It is! The Mega Bitch! Let me at her!” Fred said loudly with joy.
“Sure!” Oscar grinned.
The next morning.
Oscar and his family were having breakfast while his evil mom was on the phone.
“Morning!” Fred yelled but no one heard or saw him except Oscar. “How’s the snot flicking?”
Oscar tried to to pay him any attention as he got told off for smirking for no reason sometimes.
“I spent all night in that stupid garden shed and you didn’t even bother coming to look for me!” Fred yelled.
Then Rik Mayal saw Oscar’s Mom.
“Is it? It is! The Mega Bitch! Let me at her!”
“Give me an axe No give me a chainsaw I want to slice her into tiny piece!” Fred yelled.
Oscar’s siblings who now could hear and see Fred were quite concerned.
Then Mom breathed.
Fred choked exaggerating. “The death breath! She got me with her death breath! Be gone! Evil one!” He gasped doing a crucifix.
“Oscar what are you smirking at?!” Dad yelled.
“Nothing...” Oscar replied.
“I’m gonna drive a stake right through your heart!” Fred yelled at Dad.
“Right that’s it Mr Mayal! I will not be spoken to like that! Get out!” Dad yelled at Rik Mayal.
Oscar found it amusing that his parents were angry at someone other than himself. And that that someone wasn’t frightened of them and easily flustered them.
Oscar watched the Simpsons for the rest of the morning. He was watching In Marge we trust.
“Homer get that smelly box away from the dining table it’s been at the dump!” Marge nagged.
“But Marge I’m concerned! Why does it look like me?! Wh o would do such a thing?!” Homer was concerned.
“Hey maybe someone is watching us! They could be watching us right now!” said Bart.
“Don’t be ridiculous! No one is watching us right now! Now eat your dinner!” Marge nagged.
The Simpsons looked around nervously.
“Moooooom.... ? The TV’s acting weird...” Oscar asked.
“Oscar we have bigger problems right now...” said Mom from the kitchen. Oscar went to the kitchen to find Fred still there annoying his parents. Fred had got his head shut in the fridge and was struggling.
“Fred you have a thing for getting your head slammed in fridges...” said Oscar.
“That was Eddie’s fault that one time!” said Fred struggling. He made cartoony stretching sounds as he tried to pull out his head from the fridge.
Oscar winced as a cartoon splat sound was heard as Fred pulled his head free. But something wasn’t right.
“What the deuce?! You look like Stewie Griffin!” said Oscar.
“My head! She squashed my head! The bitch! She squashed my head! The evil one reigns supreme!” Fred screamed with a squashed head.
A night time game of real burglars...
However Fred discovered Oscar at little Elizabeth’s age, still wore at night um...
“Snot face wake up!” Fred woke up very young Oscar in his crib bed.
Oscar groaned and woke up.
“What is it...” he asked in a high pitched manner.
“We’re gonna play burglars!” said Fred.
“Real burglars?” Oscar asked.
“Yes real burglars! I even made you a striped sweater!” He had ruined one of Oscar’s sweaters by painting black stripes on it.
“Peeeyeeeew! What stinks of dog poop?!” Fred smelt something bad.
Oscar groaned and Fred saw and heard a plastic crinkling that he was wearing a nappy. And it was messy.
“I am not changing that...” Fred groaned hoisting Oscar out of his crib bed. Oscar wriggled about in his nappy and pyjama top as Fred carried him.
“Okay fine... Eeeeeeew....” Fred sighed and carried Oscar over to the changing table.
He laid Oscar on the changing table and tore open his nappy. Oscar wriggled impatiently.
“I never have this trouble with Snotface...” Fred groaned. He was disgusted by the insides of Oscar’s nappy.
Eventually Oscar was changed into a clean nappy and was wearing the jumper Fred painted black burglar stripes on.
However he went in the bathroom for some reason.
”Why do you need to go in there? You go in your nappy..” Fred sighed.
Oscar only went in there to pull faces in the mirror. While he did this he was weeing in his nappy.
And so they burgled the house, but first. Fred has a problem if Elizabeth sneezed. He had the same problem with Oscar.
Oscar sneezed. Fred went bouncing about the place.
Anyway like in Rik Mayal’s movie, they caused utter panic for the parents. Oscar’s in this case as the thought they had actual burglars.
(Stuff rattling about and smashing.)
When Fred played real burglars with Elizabeth her dad, Nigel mistook a cop for the burglar and pulled him down the stairs in a tussle.
”Nigel! Please don’t die!” Elizabeth’s evil Mega Bitch mom cried. Don’t worry Mega Bitch, it’s the 1990s and you’re white and upperclass. He’ll just get a slap on the wrist.
As police dragged Nigel off to jail for his slap on the wrist. Um they never explain how he got out again so I’m guessing the police understood him mistaking one of their officers for a burglar and lightly reprimanding him. While Nigel/Oscar’s Dad was lead away Fred shows his soft, sweet side. As he sits in a tree holding Elizabeth/Oscar. Like a long lost loving uncle. D’aaaaaawwwww!
Then he has this um habit of wiping boogers on them... Eeeeeugh...
Oscar flinched as Fred wiped a booger on his pyjamas.
Oscar appears to be attending nursery or a baby swimming class.
He was watching Simpsons on cable, which was why it was on during the day instead of once in the evening.
What he didn’t notice was that the Simpsons were watching him! Wooooooo! It’s like the twilight zone!
His Mom, not a Mega Bitch yet called him and took him to baby swim class.
As well as having a slow to develop ability to go to the toilet on time, he was slow at learning to swim. He would drive his parents and their absent patience round the bend constantly requiring swim nappies and arm bands.
Oscar swam about in the baby pool while Rik Mayal tried to cause trouble again.
Luckily they had fun that night.
This time when Fred woke Oscar up, they weren’t playing real burglars.
”We’re redecorating the lounge with dog poo!” said Fred. “I suppose you’ll be contributing... stinky pants...” He checked Oscar’s nappy. This time it was clean. “Never mind. We have some decorating to do.”
They snuck down to the stairs. Fred rode the bannister sliding down it carrying Oscar.
”Wheeeeeeeee!” He cheered. “Oooof! Who put that there?!” He slammed painfully into the bannister decoration at the bottom.
In the lounge, which Fred rolled into ninja style. He found some ink.
”Let’s write on the carpet, “Mother sucks!”
Oscar shook his head.
”You’re right, decorating the lounge with dog poo would be far more satisfying. Wait here, snotface.”
Fred went outside. He came back in on his hands in a handstand because as he whispered to Oscar, he had dog poop on his shoes. “Dog poo!” He somersaults and lands his poop smothered shoes on the nice clean carpet with a splat. He dances about smooshing poop on the couches and armchairs.
“Dog poop! Dog poo! Lovely smelly dog poo! All on sides, all down there! Lovely smelly dog poo!” Fred sang while doing this.
Oscar decided to provide more uh mess to ruin the lounge with as he took off his nappy undoing the stickY tabs.
Fred gagged seeing he had messed his nappy quite badly. “Thanks snotface. Start on that couch over there,”
Oscar grinned and smooshed his dirty nappy across the couch seats.
Eventually his family must have twigged that he was having night time shenanigans because mom was scrubbing the carpets of the lounge clean from the poop and discussing with Dad and Big Mouth how to make sure the baby stayed in his crib.
”I’ll be keeping an eye out for little Ozzy after his bed time, if I catch him we can play dollies until he gets tired.” said Big Mouth.
Oscar winced. He was not playing dolls.
”I don’t think the baby likes dolls, sweetie. But I think he’d love a new teddy bear!” Dad gave baby Oscar a teddy bear with a big wet shiny black nose. Oscar gurgled transfixed by the teddy bear’s big wet shiny black nose. He squeezed its nose which squeaked like a toy.
This of course changed the dynamics of Oscar and Rik Mayal as Fred’s night time shenanigans. If Oscar got up early He was immediately caught by Big Mouth and taken to her room. The egg shaped potato thing with a huge mouth dressed him up as a doll... Oscar blushed mortified.
”Why do we have to play what you wanna play...” Baby Oscar sulked as per the Rugrats Rule Bigmouth can understand him but grownups can’t.
”Because you’re my tiny little brother...” Bigmouth teased him by using perception and distance as a trick to look like she was squeezing his tiny head with her fingers like when Judy was teasing Peter. Oscar frowned.
Of course that was only if he managed to escape his room! Very often Teddy stopped him as the living teddy bear creature grabbed the back of Oscar’s diaper or scooped him up in his big furry paws if he took the form of a fully grown bear.
This particular night Oscar was hoisted off his feet by Teddy who held him aloft and sniffed his nappy constantly and intrusively.
Oscar sweated and wriggled as Teddy sniffed his diaper with his big wet shiny black nose.