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24 Hours . Someone pranks the Easter festival with chicken eggs in the brass instruments and Bart gets the blame. But is he to blame. Mr Burns decides he wants to be a super hero and becomes Fruit Batman but no one takes him seriously. Meanwhile Oscar causes utter chaos such as screaming about Barbar, king of the elephants again.

Plot[]

The title gag I’d the Easter bunny fighting the Treehouse of Horror XII leprechaun.

The Billboard gag is advertising chocolate Johnny Depps.

The Chalkboard gag is “Jesus’s last words were not, TGIF.”

The couch gag is the Easter Bunny painting eggs and putting them on the couch. Homer sat on them and squashed them.

”D’oh!”

...

Kent was reading live news outside at the scene. He was in the town square by the Jebediah statue.

“A plague is sweeping through Springfield.” said Kent.

Oscar screamed hysterically with fear.

”Sit down and stop screaming!” Homer forcefully sat Oscar down when he grabbed him by his sweater collar.

“A blue bonnet plague. (chuckles)” said Kent. “Springfield's ladies are wearing colorful Easter hats to celebrate the resurrection of... Jesus Christ.”

We pan across the square where everyone is celebrating Easter.

♪ I could write a sonnet ♪
♪ About your Easter bonnet ♪
♪ And of the girl I'm taking ♪
♪ To the Easter parade. ♪

A man sang beautifully. Someone put Easter bunny ears on Jebediah. The statue sighed exasperated.

Greek orthodox priests/vicars held placards that read; “This is our Palm Sunday.”

Greek Hero Oscar wearing a chiton and sandals with olive leaves in his hair held a placard that read; “Hail Zeus!”

”Oz, Greece isn’t polytheistic anymore... they’re orthodox Christians...” said Hugo.

”Well I’m all for celebrating palm trees and praying to Zeus! The sky god!”

Hugo face palmed.

The Van Houtens randomly adopted a blond boy or he was just happening to stand near Kirk. The boy was dressed smartly in his church clothes holding an Easter egg basket with Easter eggs inside.

Otto took some plastic grass that was decorating the boy’s Easter egg basket and put it in his smoking pipe and lit it to smoke.

”Eeeeeugh!” he said disgusted. Otto what is wrong with you?!

“Whoa. We'd better get this concert started. The giant chocolate bunny's melting.“ said Lou to the chief as they found the giant chocolate bunny was melting. And Uter the German kid and Wendell were eating it.

“Hey don’t eat that! Shoo!” Wiggum shooed Uter and Wendell away.

Wiggum saw the chocolate bunny was hollow. “Hollow? We paid for solid!”


“Chief, the company's named Bunny Hollow.” said Lou.

”I thought that was where they lived.“ said Wiggum.

Mr Burns was watching the school band in dumb British royal guard outfits practicing their instruments.

“Look at those delightful children, Smithers. All those healthy organs, ripe for the harvesting.” said Mr Burns being creepy.

(strumming glockenspiel) A boy with glasses was playing the glockenspiel. Mr Burns imagines him as internal organs.

(chuckles) Mr Burns laughed dementedly as he eyed the boy with hunger and lunged at him.

“Not here, sir. Not now. Not ever.” said Smithers dragging him away.

Moe found a Peep Show box. The randy devil!

“Mm. Hmm.” He put coins in it. The curtains opened and there were eggs. “Uh, not sure what I'm expecting to happen here.”

Mr Largo gathered round the school band. Including Lisa. And they got ready to play.

♪ Here comes flute and piccolos ♪ Mr Largo sang.

Kids playing flutes and piccolos.

Piccolo Jr grunted furiously.

Goku winced.

♪ What comes next, the horns, horns, horns ♪

(sputtering) Lisa and the brass instrument players blew their instruments hard but something was blocking them.

(sighs) Largo sighed annoyed.

♪ The horns, horns, horns ♪

(sputtering) Lisa and the others tried to play their instruments.

”Blow, you little disappointments!“ Mr a Largo snapped.

(horns honking) Lisa, Martin and the other brass players, including Database. He’s a fat geek of course he’s in the band as a brass instrument player. Likely a tuba or sousaphone...

Everyone gasped as eggs shot out of the band instruments. The eggs rained down upon everyone.

(crowd screaming) Everyone screamed as eggs rained down on them splattering and making a mess.

Eggs splattered on Milhouse’s glasses. He took them off and two more eggs splattered on his eyes.

Gaston from Beauty and the Beast shoved him out of the way and swallowed the falling eggs.

”Now I’m roughly the size of a baaaaaaaaarge!” he sang.

”Oh shut up!” Hugo yelled.

(screaming) Homer screamed as eggs landed on him. “Where’s the bacon?!” He screamed angrily. Bacon fell on him. “That’s better.”

Skinner was splattered with eggs. “Ye gods! I’m allergic!” He suffered hives.

(panting) people panted (choking) and choked.

“Who could've shoved eggs up our brass?” Lisa asked looking into her saxophone. She too was pelted with eggs.

(laughing) Bart sat on a mailbox in his Sunday best was laughing maniacally.

”His amusement is tantamount to culpability!“ said Sideshow Mel angrily.

(crowd clamoring) an angry crowd gathered round Bart.

”Easy, easy. Let's not jump to conclus...” Bart gulped.

”Too late. Already jumped.“ said Rainer Wolfcastle menacingly.

(whimpers) Bart whimpered.

”Egg don't belong in a chicken's eye. It belongs in her pee-poo-birth-hole.“ said Cleatus.

Oscar screamed with laughter. “Pee poo bumhole!”

“Kill that boy!” Cleatus yelled.

”Daaaaaad! That’s my boyfriend!” Mary Spuckler whined.

“Now Mary, Daddy wants to incite an angry mob....” said Cleatus.

(panting) Bart fled from the angry mob.

“It's Easter; why aren't these people at work?” said Mr Burns as Bart shoved him aside and he tumbled into the Androids Dungeon comic book store. Because it’s Easter you crazy old gargoyle...

(doorbells jingle) Mr Burns looked about the comic book store.

”Good Lord. Look at all these comical booklets.“ said Mr Burns.

“Yes, yes. Just don't exhale your death breath directly on them. Thank you.” said Comic Book Guy sat at his till.

Mr Burns took a deep breath and exhaled putrid green fumes upon the comic books. They rotted and became mouldy as a sinister tune played out. He has deadly breath now...

”Right that’s it! Get out of my store! You’re so barred!” said Comic Book Guy angrily.

And Matt stupidly wrote that Mr Burns’s liked comics in his youth. He’s a creepy old man who listens to wax cylinders. I doubt he likes comics...

...

“You know, I used to collect these bestapled fables.” said Canon Burns. No!

Cue flashback. Kid Burns is reading a comic book.

“What are you reading?” His dad/adopted dad yelled. He got adopted in Rosebud.

“The adventures of The Good Shepherd and his sidekick, The Fleecy Kid.” said Kid Burns.

“Bah!” said Father Burns.

”That's his battle cry. Baa! The sound which terrifies sheep rustlers the length and breadth of Michigan's untamed upper peninsula.” said Kid Burns.

His father snatched the comic.

”You should be out in the fresh air, kicking dogs.“ said Father Burns. This flashback is stupid and nonsensical.

“I'm gonna buy this publishing company and burn it to the ground.” Father continued. He did so and made Monty watch.

“Why did you have to lock us in?” the comic book writers in the burning building screamed.

“Teach my son a lesson!” said Father Burns.

Oscar in the present outside the comic book store clapped sarcastically. “Yeah sure Old man Burns... you’re a horrible monster because your dad burnt your comics... sure... like that’s believable... honestly...” He went in the comic book store with Hugo.

“How much for your entire collection?” Hugo asked.

“Um, the speed of light, expressed in dollars.” said Comic Book Guy.

”Just give him Faraday's Constant.“ Hugo sighed.

Oscar stood there with a pen and check-book confused. “I uh... I don’t know what that is...”

Hugo face palmed.

...

At home.

(humming) Marge took an egg out of her hair and cracked it into a frying pan to make fried eggs, at night...

“Nice going, Bart.” Lisa ranted. “You've ruined Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter.” See Bart Vs Thanksgiving. Miracle on Evergreen Terrace. This very episode and um when did he ruin Halloween?! “The legendary grand slam.”

“What about Kwanza?” Oscar asked being stupid.

”I’ll Kwanza you!!” Homer strangled him.

”Dad no!” Lisa yelled.

”Get off of me!” Oscar broke three. “Do that again and I’ll kill you!”

“You guys, I swear I didn't do it.” said Bart.

His family laughed.

”No I’m serious! I didn’t do it!” said Bart.

They laughed harder.

(funeral march playing) The Simpsons stopped and wondered where that music was coming from.

“Oz!” Homer yelled. Because Oscar always made music play at inappropriate moments.

”That’s not me... It’s coming from out in the front yard...” said Oscar.

“Oh, I don't like the sound of that funeral march.” said Marge.

”Okay, I'll pay for your damn band candy!“ Homer was suddenly at his bedroom window looking out to see the school band was outside playing the Funeral march. “What was it, $1,700?” That’s some expensive band candy...

“Forget the candy! We're here to turn this... “ Bart’s head made up of the band in formation. “into this.” Bart in a noose hanging with X eyes.

“Now do me wearing a sombrero.” asked Homer. They made that image. (chuckles) “Now have me sleeping under a cactus.” They spelt out “That’s racist!” “D'oh!” Homer groaned.

”No it’s not you bloody snowflakes! Now make an image of Mexican Homer sleeping under a cactus now or I’ll shoot you all with my AK 47!” Oscar yelled from Bart’s bedroom window which for this gag faces the front. He is pointing an AK 47 at them.

The band hastily forms the image of Homer wearing a sombrero asleep under a cactus.

Homer laughs.

...

“Hand over your son, so we can administer "Band Justice."” said Mr Largo.

(plays dramatic music) The band played a tune.

Bart gulped and shut the curtains. “I know this looks bad. And I admit, I would totally lie in a second to Lisa or Dad, because I can’t stand em, (Lisa made an annoyed Ha!) but I would never lie to you Mom, or Maggie.”

Bart picked up Maggieand looked her in the eyes, “I did not do that prank.”

Maggie sucked her pacifier and nodded. She believed him.

“Wow, he passed the Maggie test. And remember how Maggie solved Cookiegate?” said Lisa.

“All too well.” said Homer.

We cut to the Simpsons Short where Bart ate the cookies.

”Ugh... there is no perfect crime...” he groaned with a stomach ache from eating all the cookies.

Lisa addressed the band.

“To prove my brother's innocence, I demand a youth court.” Lisa exclaimed. A boy clapped two cymbals together. “That's right! Bart must not be judged by these kids, but by a jury, of kids. Mostly these kids. There's only so many kids.” Lisa sighed.

(sighs) “I'm afraid once a youth court has been demanded, we are legally obligated to shut down mob rule, as decided in the case of Rubber v. Glue and reaffirmed by I Know You Are v. What Am I.” said Skinner.

Bart laughed at the names of those court cases.

“Son, if there's one thing I've learned as a defendant and a juror, it's stay out of the courtroom. It's so frickin' boring. Run, boy! I'll create a distraction.” said Homer. Bart fled as Homer struck up the band. And of course when he struck up the band Gaston got annoyed at him.

“Not yet!” He stuffed a tuba on Homer’s head.

”Sorry.” said Homer. His lips came out from the mouth piece.

Homer took Largo’s baton and got the band to play Stars and Stripes forever. Hopefully not forever...

(playing "Stars and Stripes Forever") The gag lasts for a bit then the crescendo and fireworks...

“Anyone can conduct Sousa.” Largo snapped feeling jealous.

...

In the kitchen.

“Good news, bad news. we're allowed to select the judge, but it's impossible to find one who doesn't hate you.“ Lisa snapped at Bart.

”Now that’s certainly not true!” said Judge Snyder. The Simpsons gasped as he was in their kitchen.

”Judge Snyder!” Marge gasped.

”In the flesh.” said Snyder. “Lisa I don’t hate Bart. Sure he can be a right Dennis the Menace.(He tousled Bart’s spikes boisterously.) But I’ll happily take his court case.”

”Grrrrrr! Can’t you just hate my loathsome brother too?! Gaaaaah!” Lisa stormed off.

”She’s getting nasty again. Like that time Willie ruined the school medieval fayre with rats in a pie... and Bart got blamed.” said Oscar.

”Mmmmmm.... Pie rats...” said Hugo. Pirates.

”Arrrrrrr!” Oscar made a pirate grunt enthusiastically.

Plot 2[]

Then Grampa wanted to be the judge.

”Grampa you can’t be a judge...” Bart groaned.

”Why not?” Grampa asked.

”Because you’re bigoted and you think all judges wear bath robes and hold a hammer like Snooty.” said Bart.

”Why doesn’t he just evict those two midgets and have them charged for trespassing if they ever go anywhere near his mansion again?” Oscar asked making references.

”Ha! You have egg on your face! Your honour!” Bart laughed at Snyder as he cleaned the splattered eggs on his robes and face.

”Yes quite so Young Bart Simpson.” said Judge Snyder. “Now I have to be a fair judge and assume you’re innocent until proven otherwise. That’s how the law works Mr Simpson...” He sighed at Homer. “But you chuckling about this assault of chicken ovulations does paint you in a guilty light, Bart! Look now stop guffawing!”

”I’m Hahahahaha! I’m sorry your honour! It’s just hilarious!” Bart chuckled.

Then suddenly Lisa glaring brought Attorney General Janet Reno in to be judge.

”Janet Reno?” Bart asked.

”No Lisa! Janet Reno can’t preside over Bart’s court case! She’s evil!” said Oscar.

”She’s not! She’s very fair!” Lisa argued.

”She’s evil! Lovejoy said so and wrote it on the church marquee!” said Oscar. See Meet The Lovejoys.

Lisa face palmed. “That’s because he’s a hardline Republican! He hates any Democrats... or Attorney Generals... or judges...”

“Attorney General Reno! Bishop to knight’s four!” said Abe joyfully. Or something like that. I don’t like chess.

”Abe! Is that really you?” Janet Reno asked. “And that’s better not be gum you’re chewing Young man.”

Oscar was blowing bubbles with bubblegum. “It’s a free country...” he replied rudely.

”Grampa you know Attorney General Janet Reno?” Lisa asked.

Grampa jabbered.

“The attorney general and I have been playing chess through the mail ever since.” Grampa had just bored everyone with a ridiculous story.

“I find that a little hard to believe.” said Lisa.

“Yeah, why would you play chess through the mail when you can play chess through the lnternet? Or preferably, not play chess at all?” Bart said annoyed by geeky things.

”See here, sass mouth, you're not too big for me to tan your hide.” Abe threatened to spank him.

Marge gasped. “Abe no!”

”It's not a threat if I don't know what it means.“ said Bart.

”Tanning your hide means a spanking...” said Oscar.

”I'll fix your wagon!” Grampa ranted shaking his fist.

”Thanks. I'd like that. the back wheel fell off.” said Bart.

Grampa muttered.

...

At Burns’s manor.

“Ugh! I get a whiff of the immigrant from these newfangled superheroes.” said Mr Burns disgusted in a comic book. Enough of his strange love of comics!

”I’m sorry sir. I’ll pull some strings with the Springfield Republican Party and get the Grande Gringo deported.” said Smithers seeing his master was annoyed at a Mexican themed super hero.

“Hmm. Reclusive millionaire, stately mansion, damaged psyche. (chuckles) He's just like me. Smithers, I, too, shall become a crime-fighting bat.” Mr Burns was reading a Batman comic.

“Hmm.“ Smithers sighed.

“But I won't become just any bat. I shall be the terrifying bat who swoops from the sky and sucks the vital essence of his prey. I shall be Fruit Bat Man!” said Mr Burns.

Smithers sighed. “But sir! What about your song?”

♪ You've got to love to be hated ♪
♪ Find the good in being bad ♪
♪ Oh, the crowd is full of gentlemen ♪
♪ But they've paid to see the cad ♪
♪ Yes, it's a hoot, a kick, a gas ♪

Mr Burns smiled. “Yes but per my backstory the author doesn’t believe in and those loathsome do gooder townsfolk... Maybe I should try to be good and win their hearts...”

”Sir it’s a um a bit too late to have an epiphany... everyone hates you. Well except me of course.

Mr Burns gave a confused look. “Why don’t you despise me like those fools?”

”Because sir. You took me in and raised me as your own after my father bravely gave his life to stop the reactor from overloading and causing a meltdown.” said Smithers.

”Yes it’s true Waylon. You’ve been like a son to me. Until of course my actual son Larry turned up one evening. Larry don’t touch that!” said Mr Burbs softly. Then he scolded Larry for touching his books.

”Ahem. Sir, I-I don't suppose you'll be forgetting about this tomorrow?“ said Smithers.

”No sooner than I'd forget my own mother.“ said Mr Burns getting up and walking to his stuffed polar bear.

“That's not your mother, that's your bear.” said Smithers.

“Well, then, where's my stuffed mother?“ Mr Burns asked.

”Sir your mother is still alive. You instruct me to take phone calls from her in your steed because you hate talking to her...” said Smithers.

”Oh of course. Where did I get the idea I had her stuffed?!” said Mr Burns.

...

At the school gym. In canon they hold Bart’s trial in the gym for some reason.

”Because my court house is infested with rats...” said Judge Snyder.

”I want Attorney General Janet Reno! Women power!” Lisa ranted.

Oscar stuck his tongue out at Lisa.

“Principal Skinner, are you wearing hard-soled shoes on this gym floor?” The school proctor who looks like Roz asked sharply.

“No, ma'am. Sneakers.” said Skinner.

“You're wearing sneakers to a trial? Oh, God, the press is gonna have a field day with this.” Roz sighed.

“Yay, field day! I can go cuckoo and no one can stop me!” Oscar cheered running around like a lunatic. Bart winced.

”That's exactly what George W. Bush said when he was inaugurated.“ said Skinner.

Bart talked about the court sketch artist. They hired Matt Groening...

”Well my court sketches look nothing like me!” said Bart. Matt drew him in the Tracey Ullman shorts style. “Nice try Pops...” said Bart.

...

Mr Burns insisted on being a brooding dark bat themed superhero.

”You’re not too rich to sue Monty! Cease and desist!” DC’s lawyers chased after him.

Burns as Fruit Bat Man fought Krusty as the Joker, but drunk. Then Doctor Colossus then the Abominable Doctor Lenny.

A mad scientist they asked Werner Herzog to come back and voice laughed evilly. “Bwahahahaha!

Anyhoo, I don’t think Doctor Lenny has any relation to Lenny Leonard. It’s just a coincidence.

Then Satan and Darth Sidious were cross with Monty.

”Monty, embrace the dark side of the force!” said Darth Sidious.

”Oh! But I’ve got a thing going here!” Mr Burns whined while saving the world as Fruit Bat Man. And Homer was the Penguin! Hehehe!

Darth Sidious sighed.

”Look Monty, the other villains and I are a bit concerned by your honourable actions and virtuous words...” said Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber.

”Yeah!” said Eric Cartman.

”Can’t talk, moonlighting as an eccentric billionaire superhero who is not Batman, but inspired by him!” said Mr Burns as Fruit Bat Man going off to save people etc.

...

Meanwhile in court.

”Lunchlady Doris, did anything go missing from the school kitchen yesterday?” Lisa was cross examining people.

”Yes, three dozen eggs!” said Lunchlady Doris.

Everyone gasped.

”Could Bart have taken them?” Lisa asked.

”Certainly not! The only things that boy takes are sodas and desserts!” said Lunch Lady Doris.

”Objection! Unhealthy!” Marge objected.

”Denied! You should really be more responsible about what your son eats.” said Judge Snyder.

Attorney General Janet Reno cackled evilly because Lovejoy thinks she’s evil.

”Could anyone get to those eggs aside from you?” Lisa asked Doris.

”Never. Only I have access to them!” Doris had the only key on a necklace that she hide down her top so it was in her boobs.... Eeeeew! “Well myself and the seagulls that laid them.”

”Seagulls?! Eeeeeeeew!” Homer groaned.

”Mine Mine eggs?!” Irreep was flabbergasted.

”Mine mines... hehehehe!” Oscar chuckled.

”I rest my case your honour.” Lisa said smiling confidently that she helped Bart. Bart grinned happy she helped him and they did stupid MacDaddy, hip hop thumb gesture hand gesture things like Hey Arnold does with his friend Gerald.

Arnold grimaced. “That is so nineties...”

”Why aren’t you cross examining the witnesses boy?” Homer as the Penguin asked Hugo.

”Because Lisa is the sensible genius. I’m the mad genius! Mwuhahahaha!” Hugo laughed maniacally and rolled his eyes about to show he was crazy.

Homer grimaced exasperated.

...

Meanwhile because I won’t have her as a guest judge. Janet Reno made heavy handed judgements like sending in a heavily armed SWAT team to deal with a father holding himself up in a warehouse with his kids because his bitch of a wife asked for full custody of them in the divorce.

”Oz! For all you know he could have been violent or abusing them...” said Lisa.

”Well thanks to Ms Reno 24 innocent children died in the resulting gun battle...” said Oscar.

”That’s not the Attorney General’s fault! That was guy behind the Waco massacre!” Lisa replied.

Meanwhile everyone else continued the Easter festivities. Only the Simpsons and a few people who really hated Bart turned up to his trial.

”I’m melting! Meltiiiiing! Oh what a world!” The giant chocolate bunny cried as he melted in the very hot Easter weather. Uter and Wendell were eating him.

Random blond kid in his church clothes with a basket of Easter eggs winced as Otto tried to smoke the plastic leaves decorating his Easter egg basket again.

Mr Burns as Fruit Bat Man was trying to harvest organs from the children in the band....

”Mmmmm.... organ harvest...” said John Frink Sr.

”Glavin...” Professor Frink Jr sighed.

And Moe was disappointed by yet another peep show.

He stormed off from the nickel peep show cabinet.

Greek Hero Oscar annoyed the Greek Orthodox church by celebrating palm trees and praying to Zeus.

The Band played again safe in the knowledge that Bart was at school in a court trial.

Basically aside from the saxophones which are cool, all the other brass instruments are geeky so only the fat nerds played them. And what sort of dumb name for an instrument is a sousaphone...

Nigel Uno, who is not UNO glared at the fourth wall while playing a sousaphone.

Oscar was in the bushes getting changed out of his chiton and sandals. He was now wearing a diaper as he headed to a section of the town greenery and fields labelled with a sign “Babyfur Easter egg hunt.” There were babyfurs or baby furries in diapers hunting for Easter eggs and that anthropomorphic dog dressed up as the Easter bunny was twerking again....

Baby Oscar winced.

Ralph kept dropping his eggs because his basket had a hole in it.

”Yay!... Yay!.... Yay!” He said cheering every time he picked up the same egg...

Suddenly Hey Arnold arrived to speak to Oscar. He winced because he saw Oscar wearing a diaper. “Um I’m not even gonna ask...”

”What is it Arnold...” Oscar sighed as he hunted for eggs amongst all the colourful babyfur characters.

”Chocolate Boy has got addicted to chocolate again...” said Arnold.

”Chocolate!” said Chocolate Boy.

Oscar winced.

Plot 3[]

Mr Burns shamelessly parodying Batman as his own original character Fruit Bat Man.

With Homer as Penguin. Lenny as Caesar Romero Joker. Crazy Cat lady as Catwoman...

Then he had billionaire parties like Bruce Wayne. And a butler.

”Of course, Master Bruce.” said Alfred Pennyworth.

Bartman spying on the party winced. Oh and Lenny stole a wall candelabra.

”I should really stop Lenny.” said Bartman.

”No, that candelabra is going to a good cause. To charity.” said Oscar.

After the evening party Mr Burns and Waylon chatted about the past.

”Smithers- I mean Waylon my dear boy. When your father sadly met his end I was left as your sole carer. I um have no idea where your mother was in all this.” said Burns. “I never contemplated the idea of having children. I was a selfish lover, according to my many exes. So when I realised I was the only father figure left in your life, I had to get used to being a father.”

Smithers listened intently.

Obviously the story included funny moments like Young Burns changing baby Smithers’s diaper... hehehe!

...

In court.

“So Bart couldn't have taken the eggs. I was with him the whole weekend.“ said Milhouse.

“You'd make up any lie for that Simpson boy, wouldn't you?” Skinner cross examined him.

“Yeah, but I'd pee my pants.” said Milhouse. Eeeeew!

”Nelson.“ Skinner instructed.

Nelson gave Milhouse a wedgie. “Dry as a bone.” Milhouse was telling the truth as he hadn’t wet himself.

(sighs) Milhouse sighed.

“Now do Oscar.” said Skinner.

Nelson gave Oscar a wedgie. Hoisting him up by his diaper. “Ugh! Wetter than my grandma’s kisses... gross!” Nelson groaned as Oscar’s diaper had a large pee stain down the front.

“Now, that's what I call "legal briefs."” said Krusty. “What? The joke was in my head! I had to say it...”

”I call fourth everyone that hates Bart Simpson.” Attorney General Janet Reno demanded.

”Agreed, reluctantly.” said Judge Snyder.

Lisa gasped. Rats! That could make the case more complicated!

Moe was up in the witness box.

Bart feeling glum looked down at the line of people who hated him. There was his own dad. Not a big surprise. Bumblebee man, Luigi, Skinner and. A stinger tune blared out and Bart gasped because Sideshow Bob turned up to his EggGate trial.

”Nyaaaaaaaagh! Sideshow Bob!” Bart screamed. “Now I won’t get a fair trial!”

”Dun Dun Duuuuuuuuun!” Oscar made that annoying stinger for dramatic effect.

...

Then Matt ruined the magic and mystery of Moe not knowing Bart was his prank caller by him crying about it in court like a victim of sexual abuse.

”Uh no! That is a running gag that will go on and on... you are not ruining it!” Oscar snapped at Matt.

”Oz... when was the last time I demanded someone eat my shorts?” Bart sighed.

”Yesterday, to me and I literally tried to eat them. Ugh! Denim...” said Oscar.

The bell rang.

”Court dismissed so the children can attend class.” said Judge Snyder.

At town the billboard gag was changed from the chocolate Johnny Depp one to one advertising Herman the one armed man. “Herman’s antiquities. (And guns!)”

In detention Oscar wrote as lines, “The Easter bunny and the angry leprechaun shouldn’t fight.

The Easter bunny and the Treehouse of Horror XII leprechaun were fighting.

”Cooooool!” said Oscar.

...

The following angry townsfolk did lambast Bart.

”He orders pizza to 777 poopy pants lane! Poopy Pants Lane ends in the five hundreds!’ said Luigi annoyed.

Oscar laughed hysterically.

Bart smirked. “Aw shucks. That should not be funny, crass toilet humour... but it is,.. hehehe!” He thought.

”He submitted a slanderous essay about me!” Skinner harangued him.

”He cheats at UNO!” Homer snarled pointing at Bart.

Once again, like at Bob’s trial when he faked having a heart attack, Bart looked round to see everyone glaring at him. Then the statue of Blind Justice holding her scales was glaring at Bart. She was a Weeping Angel!

”Aaaaaaaagh! Everyone don’t blink! And don’t look away from that statue! The Angels are fast! Faster than you can blink!” Quiffy in a smart suit screamed.

Bart head desked. “No Quiffy! The statue of Blind Justice is not a Weeping Angel!” He groaned. However in his blinks the statue of Blind Justice moved closer and closer... like in the game Grandmother’s Footsteps.... “Oh great... she’s a Weeping Angel...”

...

After school Oscar sat in the lounge watching cavemen sing Billy Joel’s The Longest time.

”Ooooooh, Ooooooh, Oooooooh! For the longest tiiiiiime!”

Bart winced.

At dinner he ranted at Lisa.

“Pass the gravy, Gloria All-Wrong.” Bart ranted.

”The trial's not over, and gravy is dead animal juice.“ said Lisa.

”Mwuhahahaha!” Oscar laughed evilly and drank from the gravy boat.

”Hmm?” In canon Lisa asks Fruit Bat Man for help.

“Hmm. Just remember this: a Simpson never gives up.“ said Lisa as Bart drank his glass of milk.

He spat out his milk and laughed (laughter) “You got to be kidding!“ he said laughing with Dad.

Maggie giggled. Marge couldn’t help but join in.

Lisa sighed.

...

Oscar attended chocolate rehab as the psychiatrist with Arnold. They had tied Chocolate Boy to a chair.

”Hugsies?” Chocolate Boy was being cute wanting a hug.

”Uh no.” Oscar winced looking at the second grader with an enormous amount of chocolate smooshed across his mouth and cheeks. He had a round flat button nose that was shiny and snotty.

Arnold once again weened him off of chocolate. First with chillis. They were too spicy as Chocolate Boy breathed fire. Carob. Chocolate Boy liked carob but found he was allergic as he started itching and getting rashes. Then they got Chocolate Boy to eat radishes again.

”Okay Arnold, you seem to be making progress with Chocolate Boy, I’ll be working on Tom the screaming chocolate guy from Bikini Bottom.” said Oscar to Arnold from Hey Arnold.

”CHOCOLAAAAAAATE!” Tom the fish screamed.

Oscar winced. He was reluctant to work with the insane fish. He checked up on Sora Peres from Yugioh Arc V.

”Now I fusion summon my ice cream and custard dessert together! Mmmmmmm!” said Sora always eating candy.

Meanwhile Lisa asked Mr Burns to help as Fruit Bat Man but he was back to his selfish self, realising helping people sucked. The invisible author was right. He liked being evil.

So Lisa did some detective work of her own. Marge was cleaning all the egg splattered clothes of the other citizens. She found Willie’s kilt with an egg splattered on it. But she noticed it was the only egg splattered and it was smooshed in as if Willie wanted to eliminate himself from being a possible suspect by making it seem he got hit.

They go to see Willie. He admits to it through some spiel involving the pagan god Eostré.

”Hmmmmm! I find that hard to believe. I just think you don’t like my brother Bart...” said Lisa.

”Arrrrrrr! I hate that brat! I hate him!” Willie admitted.

In court.

”And so your honour. Willie has made a full confession.” said Lisa.

”Hmmmm. I find the defendant, Bart Simpson not guilty!” said Judge Snyder thwacking his gavel.

”Yes!” Bart cheered.

”And I find Groundskeeper Willie guilty of throwing eggs and ruining the Easter festival.” said Judge Snyder.

”You’ll never take Willie alive!” Willie yelled and escaped.

Everyone winced.

”And further more. I order everyone in the future to not immediately assume Bart is behind every prank and to give him the benefit of the doubt.” said Judge Snyder.

Everyone apologised to Bart. “Sorry.”

”Sorry pal.”

”Sorry boy.”

Sideshow Bob stormed off annoyed Bart got off innocent.

”I should think so too! I only threw one egg, at Martin for being an insufferable know it all.” said Bart frowning as everyone apologised. “I suppose I’ll have to set an example now and take up leadership as student body president and stop goofing off. I’ll have to be a good leader. Like Barbar, king of the elephants.”

”Barbar, king of the elephants!” Oscar screamed dramatically.

Everyone groaned.

”Oz no!” Bart groaned.

....

Meanwhile Grampa and all the old folks became the Avengers or a Justice League. They called themselves the Dependables. With a clone of the late Mrs Glick in an iron lung called the Iron Kung.

They played poker, took their medicine and griped at the young folk. And Mr Burns fought against the abominable Doctor Lenny.

”Yes! The abominable Doctor Lenny! Mwuhahahaha!” said Doctor Lenny.

”And then there was that time I taught a dog to make oatmeal.” said Grampa telling a dumb story as the Rambler.

Speaking of breakfast food. Bart pranked Homer’s oatmeal again.

”Hmmmmm, there’s something odd about this oatmeal.” said Homer eating his oatmeal. A bear growled. He looked up to find a fully grown Male bear lying on the kitchen table with his front paw in the oatmeal. “Oh my god! There’s a bear in my oatmeal!”

Then Oscar had one more thing to do to resolve Bart’s storyline. Get rid of the evil Janet Reno and punish Willie for once again getting poor Bart in trouble.

”Don’t make me summon the Frinkazoid on your ass...” Oscar warned ominously.

Willie laughed. “Really? You’re summoning that’s washed up nerd Professor Frink?”

”No... I’m calling forth, John Frink, the Executive Producer!” Oscar summoned Executive Producer John Frink.

”Glavin.” said a giant Executive Producer John Frink.

”Hoots Mom!” Willie gasped worried.

”Executive Produce them!” Oscar demanded.

”Executive Produce thiiiiiiis! Raaaaaaaagh!” Frink yelled.

...

”So that’s my story done..... Well at least everyone believed me.” said Bart

“And Mr Burns is moonlighting as Batman. Well his own original character Fruit Bat Man.” said Hugo.

Bart winced.

”I am Fruit Bat Man!” said Mr Burns as Batman.

”No... you’re a geek in a costume...” said Bart.

”Why you!” Fruit Bat Man snapped.

”Mr Burns why are you trying to be good now after all these years...” Oscar sighed.

”I have no idea. I apparently liked comics when I was a lad.” said Mr Burns.

”Meh... He seemed interested in my radioactive man comics when he was Oatmeal.” said Bart.

”But your villain song! It’s a high to be loathed!” said Oscar.

”Can’t I enjoy being loved?” Mr Burns asked.

”Mr Burbs it’s too late to ask for a second chance. You did a lot of horrible things. Everyone hates you.” said Oscar.

”Oooooh... It’s true... I’ve turned everyone against me...” Mr Burns sighed.

”Yeah... you might think your Fruit Bat Man but to me you’ll always be Monty the dog, or Monty the bog. Hehehehe! That cartoon is silly...” said Oscar. Then he giggled reminiscing about a cartoon he liked.

Mr Burns sighed.

“Who are you, mysterious octogenarian of the night?” asked some people he was saving one night.

“I am the squeak in the rafters, the flutter in the chimney, the tiny teeth marks in the peach. I am Fruit Bat Man.” said Fruit Bat Man.

”And another thing. Batman doesn’t do the “I am the X in the Y! I am the shiver down your spine! Except maybe in the silver age comics. He’s dark and brooding and goes “I am the Batman!” In a deep rasping voice.” Oscar explained. “What you did was an impression of Darkwing Duck’s heroic boasts...”

Mr Burns sighed.

“Now back to my natural realm, the inky night.” said Mr Burns.


The end!

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