Warning: You are not logged in. Your IP address will be publicly visible if you make any edits. If you log in or create an account, your edits will be attributed to your username, along with other benefits. Anti-spam check. Do not fill this in!== Plot == The Simpsons are having breakfast one morning. Homer is reading a newspaper. “Remember Homer, you have a physical this morning...” said Marge. She served Bart a plate of bacon and eggs and uh fried breakfast basically. “Yes darling. You’ve told me a hundred times already.” said Homer. “Ah at least our marriage is solid sweetheart...” he kissed Marge. Marge giggled and made out with her husband. At the Griffin’s. “Peter remember you have a physical this morning...” said Lois as she served Chris his fried breakfast. “Yes you’ve told me a hundred times already Lois! Nag! Nag! Nag!” Peter ranted as he read his newspaper. “God I should have just married that girl I met at my bachelor party!” “Peter, I was that girl!” said Lois. We cut to young Lois guiding a very drunk young Peter home from the Drunken Clam. “I can’t believe your friends just left you!” said Lois concerned for the drunk man. “Hey lady, you’re so pretty I wann marry you tomorrow instead of Lois!” said young Peter extremely drunk. “They’re so screwed up...” Homer chuckled as he put down his newspaper and left for his physical. A shadow stalked the street of Evergreen Terrace... Homer was at Dr Hibbert’s while he waited for his physical. Meanwhile Peter did not want to go to his physical. “Brian put this on.” Peter was in the extension/random yellow lounge and had a pantomime horse costume. “Why?” said Brian. “Because Lois thinks I am going to my physical and I don’t want to go.” said Peter. “I’m going to the steakhouse with the boys to eat as many steaks as possible.” A talking pantomime horse left out the front door. “Neeeeeeigh!” The horse clearly was Peter trying to neigh. “Kids stop letting horses into the house. We all remember that time your dad bought a brain damaged horse..” said Lois reading. Peter was driving with Brian in his car. “Okay I’ll say it. Why did we need the horse costume?” Brian asked. Peter never answered as he joined his friends at the drunken clam in a steak house. Eventually Peter had eaten so much steak he had boobs. “Come on Joe! You’ve barely eaten one!” said Brian to Joe. “I’m not very hungry Brian.” said Joe. “But even that guy has had two steaks!” said Brian. We pan round to a cow. Yes a talking cannibalistic cow... “Yes I know! I’m naughty! But I’m still ordering dessert! Oh! I think I’ll have the cheesecake!” said the gay cannibal cow. “Um... you’re a cow...” said Peter. “Yes. Have you noticed?” said the gay cannibal cow. “You’re eating steak. That’s made of cow...” said Peter. “You’re eating cow.” “Oh my god! Oh my god!” The cow was horrified. “Come on Joe eat some more steak...” Peter tried to feed him like a baby. “I DON’T WANT ANY MORE! I TOLD YOU I’M FULL!” Joe screamed. “Okay! Geez!” Peter replied. In the waiting room. “Um okay... That Peter Griffin sure is really irresponsible... why doesn’t he like physicals?” Homer wondered. “Because my doctor molested me during a prostate exam.” said Peter. “No he didn’t Peter!” Brian told Peter off. Homer sighed. “Mr Simpson Dr Hibbert will see you now.” said a nurse. ... At the Griffins. “Did Peter go to his physical?” asked Lois. “Nope.” said Oscar. “And you’re not making him go because I like letting him get his own way. Especially if his own stubbornness kills him.” “Fine. It’s your own fault Peter if you didn’t get something important found out straight away...” said Lois. “Yes that’s why we have wrong sounding muppets...” said Stewie. There was a cutaway. Swedish chef sounded gay. Kermit wasn’t even trying any more and Fozzie bear had a thick black guy accent. “Wakka wakka! Who wants to hear a funny ass joke?” asked Wrong sounding Fozzie bear. “Okay that universe is weird.” said Homer as Hibbert took his temperature etc. “Homer Simpson you’re in good health, just over weight. But you’re not gonna change are you? Ahehehehe!” Hibbert giggled. Homer went home and told Marge the news. “How was your physical?” Marge asked. “It was fine except Dr Hibbert said I’m overweight.” said Narge. “Hmmmmmm! Well at least you went...” said Marge sighing. At the Griffins. “Aaaaaaaaagh!” Peter screamed. “Lois I have a lump!” “Peter I told you to go to your physical... now it’s your own fault you have a tumour...” said Lois. Back at the Simpsons. “Hmmmmm! Well I can’t believe I am saying this again but... Homer you need to go on a diet.” said Marge. Peter bursted in as confetti and streamers and balloons went everywhere as a party was celebrated. “Happy 200th diet you fat bastard!” Peter cheered. “Hey shut up! At least I try to stick to my diet!” Homer yelled. ... Homer is driving home from work when Marge rings him. “Oh I can’t wait for dinner!” said Homer thinking he’s having something yummy for dinner. “Homer don’t you remember?” Marge asked. “It’s our anniversary?” Homer asked. “No. It’s the night you start your new diet...” said Marge. Homer whined. “Homie please! This is serious! NASA called this afternoon to say your gravitational pull was pulling satellites out of their orbit!” said Marge. “Honey... That was Bart making a prank phone call...” Homer sighed. “But it comes from a loving place! Please Homer...” Marge sighed. “Fine...” Homer sighed. He drove through a district of fast food restaurants. “I think I’ll miss you most of all Lard Lad... even if you do try to destroy the town ever so often...” said Homer. Lard Lard roared like Godzilla. Homer then decided to have one last splurge. The song Hungry like the wolf played as he ordered stupid things like a several feet long hoagie that workers of the sandwich cafe fed into him as they made it. Then he ordered a pizza, poured fries on it and ordered a lobster. When he saw he had ordered a lobster he broke down in tears and hugged it. “Oh Pinchy!!” He sobbed before putting it in the pizza box with the fries and pizza and eating everything, box included. Eventually Homer was full. “Uh Uh! Can’t let Marge see all of this!” said Homer. “Thank you!” Homer saw a Sideshow Mel bin that when you put rubbish in his mouth he said Thank you! “Eh. It’s better than those Sideshow Bob bins we used to have...” said Krusty. At Krustylu studios a gaffer threw away his can of coke into a Sideshow Bob effigy dustbin. “You will die Bart Simpson!” The Sideshow Bob dustbin yelled. Homer saw these Sideshow Mel bins. “Ah a bin!” He put his rubbish in Sideshow Mel’s mouth. “Thank you!” said the bin. “Well while I’m here I might as well get rid of all this junk in my glove compartment...” Homer threw away lots of paperwork, and random junk. Then he found a corroded car battery. He read it to check how it should be exposed. “Dispose of by- Awww! This book is too long!” He put the battery in the bin. It leaked acid that burnt a gas pipe. “I think I deserve a cigar.” Homer lit a cigar and smoked it. “You sir are worse than Hitler!” yelled Patty and Selma’s boss. Homer threw the match into Sideshow Mel’s mouth. Thank you said the bin with his face. Then a mighty explosion rocked the street as restaurants exploded. A chilli restaurant made to resemble a volcano erupted with molten lava chilli sauce. A pizza restaurant threw free pizzas from the explosion at people. “Oh boy!” said Hans Moleman happily. He waited receive a pizza. A giant chunk of concrete and bricks and mortar crushed him. Even Lard Lad was blown to bits! “Well that’s the end of that advertising monster!” said Homer. Homer left the carnage. Hungry like the wolf played again. ... The town held a meeting to discuss the explosion at fast food boulevard. “Ladies and Gentlemen.” said Mayor West. “There was a massive gas explosion at Fast Food boulevard! Causing millions of dollars in damages and putting several beloved mascots out of work!” Mayor McCheese cried. Hehehe! Mayor McCheese... “I promised I’d stay strong!” He continues crying. “Now now Mayor McCheese. No one likes weepy meat.” said Mayor West. “Is this Oscar’s doing...” Bart groaned. “No this actually happened. There were actually food mascots...” said Oscar. “Mayor McCheese! Hehehe!” He giggled at the silliness of this scene. Homer got up on stage and delivered a passionate speech that they needed to come up with a way to repair fast Food Boulevard. “But to do such thing we’d need a bond issue!” said Dr Hibbert. “And to do such a thing there needs to be an election primary to debate it! And those don’t start till July!” said Quimby. “Then we’ll hold our primary next Tuesday.” said Mayor West. “But Mr West! If we do that we will be earlier than New Hampshire!” said Lisa. “New Hampshire! Oooooooh! They’re gonna be cheesed!” said Mayor McCheese wiping himself with a pickle. Oscar laughed. “Guys don’t encourage Oscar...” Bart groaned. “We could do that.” said Krusty. “But I say we make the man who caused this accident pay! Homer Simpson!” Homer gasped. “Fast food mascots! Destroy him!” Krusty yelled. Homer screamed and ran out chased by Fast food mascots carrying weapons such as lead pipes etc. Oscar laughed. “Oh this is gonna be cool!” ... Homer was in town being chased by Ronald McDonald, Grimace, the Hamburglar, Colonel Saunders, the Burger King, Mayor McCheese, and the Noid etc. Homer was cornered in an alley by Mac Tonight the moon headed guy from the mcDonalds adverts. Homer screamed and ran away. “This is even more horrible than that time Betty White unleashed the PBS on me!” Homer cried as the Aqua Teen Hunger Force fired lasers at him. They look like McDonalds food. Frylock continued firing eye lasers. “Cooooool!” Oscar watched all the carnage. “You love carnage don’t you Oz...” said Bart. “We have to get inside from all this madness!” said Marge. Homer ran to church. “Sanctuary! Sanctuary!” Homer could be held yelling. “Oh not again...” Lovejoy sighed. Homer shut himself in. “Reverend you have to help me! An angry mob of fast food mascots are after me!” Homer screamed. Kill Bill Ronald McDonald and Grimace broke through the stain glass windows. “Give us the money!” said Ronald McDonald. “Grimace knows where you live!” said Grimace. Homer screamed. Summary: Please note that all contributions to the Simpsons Fanon are considered to be released under the CC-BY-SA Cancel Editing help (opens in new window) Retrieved from "https://simpsonsfanon.fandom.com/wiki/Bad_Uncle"